The Big Z

The Longest Hiatus Ever

2010-11-02T01:08:00.000-07:00

Its been more than an entire year since my last entry. Actually, this blog has been pronounced dead a long time ago. And actually, safe to say, it probably will stay dead for a long time to come.

I'm only posting here because I bought a new watch. REALLY! Another waste of money, you may ask? Actually after reading the previous entry, I realise that I love my watches. And that love has bred a desire for more complicated and expensive models. To quote Hui Yi, I'm a snob. Haha.

But I don't think I am, because everyone has their own vices am I right?

Ok, fine, let me showcase my latest acquisition: The Tag Heuer Carrera Day-Date Model

Its my first automatic, and my 2nd Tag Heuer. I even bought a pretty watch winder to wind the watch when I'm not wearing it. Since its going to be my dress watch, a watch winder was absolutely necessary.

So with reference to my previous post, I couldn't even wait till graduation to buy the Carrera. I think the Grand Carrera would be added to my collection soon.

Before you say that I'm a spendthrift, and I should save for my future, let me tell you that the "saving blitz" that I declared last year was successful. But I went one step further, and now I have a diversified 5-figure portfolio of REITs and shipping trusts, producing an 'ok' annual dividend yield.

So yes, the Carrera is an early reward for me.

But who cares? Cos even I don't visit this blog anymore.

Till my next acquisition, a VW Golf/Scirocco, Grand Carrera, Rolex Daytona or something else exorbitant to waste my money on.

Project Save Me

2009-06-13T09:33:00.000-07:00

I have not updated in 2 whole months. That's how long my bike has been sitting in my hall not doing anything. That's how long my arteries have been pleading for mercy. That's how long I've had to be financially prudent.

And yet I find myself in financial and coronary ruin. Haha.

Anyways, i just wanted to update my loyal 2 readers who keep coming back to check up on me, (whoever you are, I love you!) on my new hobbies (or ways to procrastinate saving money).

I adopted a more sedentary hobby compared to mountain biking, and its cheaper too. Aquarium fishkeeping! I had 200 beautiful Amazonian tetras and 2 blue ram cichlids in a heavily planted tank. Its a beautiful addition to my room. I did however, start off with 200 fish, and now I have about 80. Haha. There were a few imbalances in the nitrogen cycle, temperature and oxygen concentration issues that a beginner hobbyist is bound to encounter. As with any hobby, there were a few mistakes I committed, resulting in whole species of tetras being wiped out.

But I'm quite a learned beginner aquarist now. Maybe in the distant future, I'll get a big marine tank, to liven up my own house.

I also adopted another love. Watches. I've had a Swatch chronograph watch since I was 16. It was a birthday present from my family. I've used it everyday since then. And I love it to bits. It has been through major exams with me, has fallen off my bike with me, was there when I got 6 stitches, and saw me through NS.

And recently in March, my mom bought for me a Tissot chronograph for my 21st while we were vacationing in KL. Beautiful, polished and handsome. I believe watches are the only acceptable form of jewelry and pampering that a man can give himself. Unless you're into piercings, rings and stuff, which aren't my thing.

My Tissot chronograph's a real beauty. Unfortunately, my mum unwittingly ignited a love and desire for more nice watches. And I know this, and I'm trying too curb this, but I'm one hell of a spendthrift.

So when I went to KL again this week, and saw the Tag Heuer dealer having a moving out sale, I immediately went to take a look. I bargained and bargained and got a very good price for a watch.

And now I'm broke, cos I paid for it myself. Lol.

And why are all my watches chronographs you ask? I just hate watches without any detail on their faces. A chronograph or stopwatch, adds depth and character to the watch face. Even my Swatch, which had its chronograph fail a long time ago still gives accurate time. This shows that the stopwatch and the normal timing are running on 2 separate mechanisms, all in one small vessel on your wrist. Amazing.

Anyway, here are my 2 timepieces. I know they're nothing to be proud of, cos they're common watches and not limited edition Rolexes, but I just love my buys.

My Tissot, a present from mum, crisp and polished, nice enough for a job interview, or to jazz up any t-shirt and bermudas ensemble:

My latest buy, sporty looking, it contrasts the shiny Tissot by having a brushed steel exterior instead of a polished one:

So, now that I'm broke and super unfit from my lazing around, I hereby launch a new initiative.

Project Save Me. I will save as much cash as I possibly can, and not spend anymore on trivial wants like bike stuff, fish stuff or more exorbitant watches.

I shall go on a saving blitz for the first time in my life.

I will also go on a mission to save my heart from imminent failure. Yes, you heard me, I'm going to touch my bike again.

So we shall see how this works out.

Oh and when I was at the Tag Heuer boutique, I saw the Carrera and Grand Carrera watches. Beautiful. Maybe one can be a graduation present eh? (hint, hint).

But who knows? I'll probably have another way to waste money in the future. Do I hear a vroom vroom of my first car? Haha.

Till next time.

Stamina? Its a figment of one's imagination.

2009-04-02T04:41:00.000-07:00

I went to trail today. Finally, after 18 days of procrastination. Its alright for one not to get exercise if one is busy working or studying, but I have been slacking all the way.

Now, I've paid the price for my inactivity. I''ve lost ALL my stamina, or what little I had in the first place. :)

I've been getting slower and slower on the bike, starting from feb, when Siu Sing, Isyraf and I would trail almost every morning, and end each session with Macs. Soon, the trail sessions got shorter, the Macs sessions longer.

And now, I'm tired just riding to the trail. I did a grand total of 1 round today. And I was tired. Hot, thirsty, and lethargic.

But its alright... I need to reinvigorate my trail habits. I'll try again tmw and next week. If I can wake up, that is.

There is the Macs breakfast as an incentive.. :)

Bike Rally Man 2009

2009-03-16T12:25:00.000-07:00

I survived! 128km of fat-man torture. Again.

This year’s NTU bike rally was more punishing for me, because of the slight change in route, and the weather.

It had nothing to do with my poorer fitness relative to last year. And the Sausage Egg McMuffin I ate a minute before moving off.

But I was pleasantly surprised to meet another new dontbeaboob reader. Sorry if I spell your name wrongly, its Jegnan right? You made my day. And it was nice to meet Mr Sivasothi, another reader who recognised me last year, from 20m away, to boot.

Thank you, for making me feel like the Brad Pitt of obscure blogs. Maybe one day I’ll be as reputed as fatcyclist.com. Good site by the way, given by Siu Sing.

In retrospect, I should have slept earlier, because I think I was moody in the morning. The Macs burger right before flag off, which I was still eating outside 7-11 when the air horn sounded, made me feel bloated and nauseous for the first 16km to the Labrador Park pit stop.

I’m not going to recount every single moment of the rally, as I think you[d be bored. I’ll try to give a balanced review of this year’s event. I’ll start with the critisicm, in true Singaporean spirit, but do reserve your judgements till you read the compliments in turn.

Complaints

In my humble opinion, I think this year’s organising committee weren’t as well prepared as last year’s. I heard that a record 6oo+ participants came down this year, up from 400+ last year, which leads me to think that there’s more funding to ensure that the event runs smoothly, befitting the Sports Club’s reputation of good events planning and management.

However, compared to last year, there were so few safety cyclists, in fact there was only one who was leading the way, a few hours into the race, at Mandai. The rest were scattered and were not doing their jobs. They were being more like participants, and not looking after my safety, instead of stopping and signalling cars like last year, they were just cycling beside me. The safety cyclsit at Mandai, the only one doing his job, kudos to you. Likewise, the road marshals, were few and far between and not at every junction compared to last year’s rally. And thank you for your very late signals especially on right turn junctions. It would help if you do not stand on the junction itself.

These issues however, are not my chief complaints. When it was in the late afternoon, at about 2p.m., Siu Sing, Isyraf and I were already at Pasir Ris, our own estate. From Elias Mall all the way past Downtown East up to the Shell Station near Loyang Point, there was not a single road marshall. There were a few left turns where people who don’t live in the area can get lost in, there were no signs, and no marshals to reassure us that we were on the right track.

And when it started to rain at Changi Beach, all the marshals ran for cover. I even cycled past the Changi pit stop a little, and had to check back to make sure it was there in the first place, as there were no marshals to direct cyclists from the road to the pitstop, which was not visible from the road. What’s more, there were 4 marshals huddled under their tent talking and laughing, 2 more sitting in the rain with ponchos on, while I saw many riders on the road, cycling past the pitstop in the heavy rain, all unaware that they missed the stop.

And to top it all off, 3 Cisco riders were idly talking at the toilet cum shelter, with their bikes being washed in the rain. Shouldn’t they be looking for stragglers, and marshalling people, ensuring safety, i.e. doing their jobs?

Another major issue I had was the drinks. Come on, where was the cold Gatorade, or at least cold water? At the Yishun pitstop, the drinks weren’t cold, but they gave a huge container of ice and people had to grab plastic cups to scoop up the ice and mix it with their drinks. Couldn’t you just put the ice in the water? At Serangoon, there were cold drinks, but only a little, and I had to tilt the container to drain out the remaining water. Made me feel bad for the guy behind me, so I didn’t take my fill.

Compliments

Ok, I complain a lot. But here comes the good points of the rally.

I loved the slight change in the route. It was more challenging and hilly, and though it came after the lactic burning section at Mandai, and even though I was cursing at the more hilly route change, it does add a greater sense of accomplishment to my finish. And I have never felt more drained since ORDing.

Some marshals, though misplaced on straight routes, which was probably not their fault, but lay with the route planners’ instead, were very enthusiastic and fun. We high-fived a few along the way, which was Sing’s idea of boosting morale.

I could see those unlucky few who had fallen or whose bikes had failed on them being attended to by the crew, though I’m not very sure of their response time, but at least they were attended to.

The Labrador Park and NTU pit stops were well stocked, which was more than I could say for the rest.

They thoughtfully provided ponchos for riders, but I would rather get wet, than hot and humid in a large plastic bag. It was thoughtful, nonetheless.

I loved Soyjoy! Because it’s a very drying snack, it goes well when you’ve bloated yourself with too much water. It sort of absorbs the water in your stomach and releases it slowly like a sponge. Haha. And knowing the price of Soyjoy, it was pleasing to have such an expensive, yummy, healthy snack. Though people of my eating habits would prefer nasi lemak or curry puffs. Haha. But Soyjoy’s good.

All I have left to say is this: I am no professional cyclist, and I’ve only attended 2 bike-related events, namely the previous year’s and this year’s bike rally. So my complaints may seem harsh or misguided. Maybe I was in an unlucky group of riders, who weren’t fast enough to see the marshals on the road, or weren’t slow enough to warrant the safety cyclists’ and Cisco’s attention. But all that is just my humble opinion.

All in all, I still say the NTU Sports Club did a great job. For $20 per participant, with pit stops all over Singapore, marshals, Cisco and medical teams on the ready, along with goody bags and lucky draws, they did a spectacular job.

In comparison, OCBC Cycle Singapore priced itself at $78 and above for each participant, and it was only a 40km stretch for non-professionals. Plus they had the financial and PR backing of an international bank, so doing what the NTU Sports Club did with $20 per person, and 128km of road in between, on top of being students in uni with personal responsibilities, kudos to all of you. And I guess with the current economic woes on sponsors’ minds, it may have been difficult to get sponsors. I noticed Cannondale was missing from the sponsors’ list compared to last year.

So enough droning. Good job this year, but compared to last year, it was a bit disappointing, though there may be other unseen factors in play that affected this year’s event planning. I go with the moolah factor? Anyone care to guess?

Personal Notes

I love my Maxxis Detonator road-training tyres! I bought it after last year’s rally in a bid to be a roadie, but I don’t like roads because of the inherent danger, especially if drivers drive like I do. It made riding easier over the long haul, though I was afraid that being a heavy rider (due to muscles, ok!) I would lose traction. And in the rain, I was afraid I would aquaplane when I hit the puddles and fall at speed. However, thanks to the Bicycling Magazine in the goody bag, which I just read today, I just learned that bikes cannot aquaplane, and that slick tyres maintain traction on wet tarmac. In fact, the more slick it is, the more traction it has, but only on tarmac. It doesn’t count those ridiculous aluminium drain covers on the sidewalks. Anyway, this was the 4th time using it, and I say buy it. They’re cheaper than the Panaracer messengers, though those are coloured.

I’m sorry Isyraf, if I went first at Mandai ah. I really cannot take the 7 consecutive camel humps in that area. And the tyres may be slick, but at speeds below 18kmh, they’re sticky as hell. So using my heavy weight, I speed down the hills and use my momentum to ride up, so I don’t need to crank up slowly uphill. Plus it was fun riding past the fitter road bikers. Haha. Suddenly being heavier gave its dividends. And my top speed was achieved at that area. It was the last long downhill stretch before we reached Yishun. I topped the speed at 53.8kmh. Fastest ever, and quite a proud moment for all jiggly cyclists around the world. And yes, I know that speed’s nothing for a fit roadie.

It was nice to have my 2 best friends and cycling buddies for the trip. Now that they know the route, we can try again, because my direction sense is as bad as an old woman’s. Haha. And Siu Sing, you fit man. Knobby tyres all the way, and still chirpy and fresh at the end, compared to the cold, crabby and hungry me in the rain. Isyraf also, you are one powerful fella. I would have taxied home if I had gotten severe cramps at Kranji. I would definitely have gone home when we passed by your house at Pasir Ris. But now all of us can wear our finishers’s t-shirts proudly.

Thanks to Siu Sing’s dad who fetched us so we didn’t need to cycle back home, wet and tired.

Oh ya, Audrey, I too forgot to take pics with you ah. Its like Japan again. Wasted oppurtunity. Haha. Next time, we both won't forget..

And lastly, a KFC 2pc meal has never been so fulfilling EVER. So was the 12-hour sleep I had. The butt pain today, however, is not very fulfilling. :)

I’ll definitely be joining next year. Woohoo!

Get free 20 pc Chicken McNuggets, when you buy any Extra Value Meal...

2009-03-10T07:08:00.001-07:00

Car Woes

I really want a car, to go back and forth NTU. I can get a decent 3yr old Perodua Kelisa (Chery QQs have bad service records) for about $19,000 or a really old honda/toyota for about $10-12k. I don't want to hostel, cos I don't think I'll study there. And basically I would like home cooked food, shelter, and laundry service from the maid.

I can use my tuition jobs for fuel money, road tax and insurance. However, someone has to give me the car first.

And to tell you the truth, I DREAD going to school. I hate public transport. Ever since I started to drive regularly, either I have the car and I go out, or take my bike for a ride, or I stay at home. I just hate waiting for the stupid bus, and then cramming on the train. I'm no snob, but seriously, why bother going out when its so inconvenient?

But it seems I have no choice. I think I'll enjoy my time in NTU, lessons and all, but I'll be one crabby guy on the train to and from there. Everyday. Haha.

NTU Bike Rally

I'm so dead this sunday. 128km of road cycling, starting at about 6.30a.m. SHIT!!! And I have not trained one bit. In fact, I haven't touched my bike for more than a week. I've been wanting to go to trail, but the weather has been bad.

And you know what? The last time I went to Tampines trail early last week, I got tired from cycling from my house to the trail, which is just 5 km. AHH! And after I reached the trail, it started to rain heavily, so Isyraf and I took cover at the nearby Esso. I bought Pokka Milk tea. An hour later, we met Siu Sing at White Sands, where I ate a double cheeseburger meal.

What's more, this has been the trend for the past month or so. I've been using time I normally would spend in the trails and just hang out at Macs, eating with Sing and Isyraf. Yes, I'm enjoying my time now, but my punishment will come this Sunday.

Stay tuned for 128km worth of fat man torture, this sunday, all round the island! If you spot me on the roads, please don't run me over. Haha.

The Bike Who Could..

2009-02-10T21:26:00.001-08:00

The new section at the end of the jungle trail is not just a fat-ass killer, it tortures you before devouring the remaining part of your soul..

!!! The climb is so $%#ing long. And after climbing that zig-zagging section that would make my PTI proud, there's one bumpy gradual downhill in the next section, not steep enough for you to use momentum only, and its full of ruts which you have to pedal over. And after that there's another gradual climb up, where it brings you to where you started initially.

Biking at Tamp now seems more like exercise rather than enjoyment... Must be the sun. Or the heat, or because I forgot my water bottle. It definitely has nothing to do with the 2 new uphill sections that tests the limits of my stamina.

I do realise I have to start biking more, at a frequency similar to the the week after I ORDed, cos the bike rally is coming in a month, and here I am, getting more and more unfit by the day.

And to start my training for the bike rally, I had a double cheeseburger lunch saver meal, upsized, with Sing. With real coke, not coke light. Shiok ah.. Lol.

Change and Hope. Yes, we can.

2009-02-10T06:17:00.001-08:00

Foreword

I decided to revamp the way I blog. I know my posts tend to be a bit long and sometimes the topics of conversation may not be to your interests, like my incessant bike blogs. So I partitioned them nicely in different sections. Enjoy, and if you like my posts, you can deliver KFC to my house to show your gratitude.

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Obama Ramblings

3 weeks into the Obama presidency and so far, to the naked eye, he seems to be rather disappointing. Here are some of his screw-ups that I noticed.

1) His cabinet nominations have been shot down due to them defaulting on their taxes, some from the thousands to the hundreds of thousands. Obama has taken full responsibility for this incident.

2) The closure of Gitmo has also drawn lots of flak. Where will the detainees go? Why should the freedom of Americans be endangered? Blah, blah blah.

3) Lastly, among other problems, Obama's stimulus package has received objections from both parties, more so from the Republicans. One republican went on to say "This isn't a stimulus package, its a spending package."

Aiyoh. I thought Obama was starting to faulter. But after thinking for a while, I realise it's not his fault. For the first point, his nominations should have been vetted properly, and this can be blamed on Obama, which he took full responsibility for on national tv. BUT isn't not paying income taxes a crime? I mean, this points to the corruption within their own government, their own people. Maybe he trusts people too much.

For point no. 2, Gitmo, in the first place is illegal. In almost all respects of its operations, it breaches human rights spelled out by the UN and Geneva convention. What he is trying to do is also to appease the international community, to show that his administration will do things properly, with justice. Not just throw you in prison, just cause they can.

Lastly, for the last point. Wah. Talk about stupid. Here the Singapore government is talking about spending more on infrastructure and skills training and improvement. We are spending money, digging into reserves? Why? Because spending does STIMULATE the economy. Our neighbour has been doing it for decades, government contract after government contract, employs people, and creates jobs. So you need to spend.

I think Obama is facing a lot of opposition from all sides. Too bad their government can't be like ours. Decisive and quick footed, because there's only one party. No bickering. Its sad to see a President who is capable of hope and change, who is stifled by his own countrymen who want nothing to change.

Why do I care so much? Because the US economy is our economy. I can't find a temp job now, cos the economy is crap. My stocks are stuck in limbo, for a long time to come. And I need the economy to be on recovery now, cos when I graduate in 3 plus years time, I want a good job man! haha.

And yes, I've been watching too much of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.. Haha. Go to http://www.thedailyshow.com/ and click full episodes.

Its good stuff, seriously. Good, relatively unbiased view US politics, draped in lots of humor. Wish my GP teacher had given me this link, then I wouldn't have had to read newsweek (yawn). And yes, Mrs Seng, you were a bad GP teacher. Thanks for leaving the class to rot 2 months before the A levels. Luckily, I HAD decent english that time. Its all gone now, thanks to the blue people in CD.

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Biking, as usual

Wah, did you know that Tamp MTB park now has undergone a makeover? New sections, new obstacles, with the original ones rebuilt. And there's this new section at the end of the jungle trail, where in my opinion is a fat-ass killer. Cos I almost died climbing the zig-zagging hill. And on top of that, there was another short burst up another hill, AND another slow long gradual climb.

I would describe that hill as 20% technical, 80% a fat man killer. I almost had a heart attack, really.

Going again tmw.. Whee!

Oh, and the fall at Bukit Timah last week has really scared me shitless. I now find the whole experience of trails scary again. It feels like I just started biking.. Just when I said, Bukit Timah makes tamp look like east coast park, I fall and hit the reset button. Nvm. Tmw I shall ram everything again.

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Facebook, Finally

I finally got facebook. Add me ok?

I got it cos I was so bored at home, and I realised that everyone had one even my old primary school teacher has an account.

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Farewell, Daryl

Good luck, Daryl, and may you succeed in whatever you want in life. Your party was awesome, for the most part.

And thanks for letting me strangle you after the party for sabotaging me.

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This concludes the first issue of the revamped dontbeaboob. Thanks for reading. Bye.

Speeding Rules!

2009-01-30T21:44:00.000-08:00

Before.

After.

Helmets saves lives and limbs.

The gorgeous crash victim.

Yesterday was the 6th time Isyraf and I went to Bukit Timah trail. I just love the clean air, and cool trail, sheltered by the dense canopy. I hate the long climbs though, tiring beyond words, for an unfit rider like me.

But I so LOVE the descents. Long, fast, bumpy. Just watch your speed, don't lose control and enjoy yourself. BUT, in the quest for more speed, some people forget control. And bam! Broken helmet, scratched up bike, and cuts, bruises and sprains that will knock one out of business for a week.

I remember telling myself before the fall, "The next downhill is clear. Time to speed. Just remember to slow down before the corner with the stupid logs, cos that's where you lost control the first time."

As I was enjoying the increased speed, (each time I hit BT, I try to go faster on the descents) the potholes gave their best at me. It was one hell of a bumpy ride. But nothing me nor my bike can't handle. Suddenly, with no warning, I was flung off my bike at that speed, landed forehead first, rolled onto my back, saw my bike flip over, and I landed on my back, with my ribs searing with pain.

Luckily a Caucasian jogger, Jamie found me, cos Isyraf was ahead. She helped collect my Oakleys, which thankfully came off, before I dragged my face on the wonderful forest floor, my helmet visor which broke off on impact, my bottle which was flung so far away, and my bike, 8 metres from where I was laying.

And the irony was, I hadn't even reached the corner where I was supposed to slow down.

I treat every fall as a learning experience. Don't overbrake with the front on slow steep drops, don't do this, blah blah. But this fall is different. I've got nothing to blame, the terrain was full of potholes and small roots, nothing I can't ram through. I didn't lose traction, nor did I skid. I can't blame my bike for the sudden fall. All I have come up with is, I was too fast and lost control.

I guess I have myself to blame. But who cares? I'll just go as fast the next time I go there again, and maybe lean back a little more than usual.

What saddens me is the loss of my Specialized Instinct helmet. A helmet is good for one major crash only, but I think I'm going to continue to use it cos I don't have the money to buy another. It cost $160 in S'pore, but I bought it for $60 in Japan. My XT brake lever, as seen from the 2nd pic above, is mauled beyond recognition Isyraf says its rugged, but I just say its ugly. Like a scar.

And now, i am rather afraid that my carbon handlebar may have internal damages after the crash, considering that the biked flipped and pivoted on the bars itself, cos even my Odi grips are scratched. I have to get the bike shop ppl to check my bar for damage. That bar is another pride I bought from Japan. Its hand made carbon fiber from a small British custom carbon fiber firm. The crash did more permanent financial damage to my bike than injure me. My shoulder, head, ribs and arm can heal. My bike can't.

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Anyways, time for confidence building again. I'll be off to Tampines trail next week once my shoulder and elbow gets ok again. I need the exercise and I think if I were to straight away go to BT to confront my fall area, I'll just chicken out and ride slowly. So visitor man, if you want to join me, be my guest. You were from VS also so I confirmed can click with you. So just contact me when you're free.

Oh, as for the other visitor, Yuva, thanks for the heads up at Kent Ridge. It wasn't useful at all. Haha. The trail there is undoable. Its not fun at all. So disjointed, and my bike is a hardtail, not a downhill bike. The trail is super technical, you need to be an expert to ride confidently there. I wouldn't mind trying, but if i lose my balance at certain points there, I'll just fall off the trail and into a pit of rocks. The whole trail is do or die. Make a mistake, and you'll fall off into a hole or pit somewhere. And once you're past the XC portions, which is indescribably dangerous, you have the downhillers section. Give me an $8,000 downhill bike, and I can definitely do the row of 20 insane logs down the hill. But my bike, with its laughable 100mm fork and no rear sus, is just insane. I'll wreck my wheels before I make it halfway down. And as for the trail, it has no clear direction and we were almost lost if not for the nearby road. Then again, maybe it was my first time at Kent ridge and maybe I need more time to get accustomed to the different requirements and difficulty of individual trails.

Well, that's all for this week and probably the next week too.

A Retrospective Perspective

2009-01-12T07:47:00.000-08:00

ORD. A date many of NSF look forward to. But what lies ahead? School. Phooey. It doesn't start for 6 more months.

I miss my office! No juniors make fun and bark orders at, no tense confrontations with the overly sensitive grown man who has the emotional depth of a four year old boy, no more being the loved NSF in the office who gets free food and drink 'just because'. No more having CD to blame for my boring life. No more nightly sit downs with Fran or Michelle, and getting paid handsomely for it.

What irks me now is that I order no one. And I get ordered around, though politely and with quite a bit of wiggle room. Drive me here, pick this up, help me carry this. Argh. Shawn, I'm sorry I took you for granted, and you should relish the position you're in now. Dept IC there is the best job ever. All the perks, and all the subordinates to help with the responsibilities.

But I guess the biggest gripe I have with ORD life is too much time, no money. As the saying goes, no money, no honey.

I miss the expendable income I will get no matter what, on the 12th of every month, and the tuition money..

At least I secured another year of tuition with Fran. Michelle is going to be a challenge because I have to teach A maths. Told her to take 3 sciences, but she didn't want. I hate maths. Ugh.

I guess I'm a rather materialistic person. Not in the 'I will kill you for cash' kind. But I use it as a motivating factor to ensure that I succeed in life. Some people want to raise children, cure cancer, or save the environment, I want to be rich enough to buy my Carbon Specialized Stumpjumper, my Audi SUV to bring it to BT and M'sia, my Audi R8 for the weekends and my BMW R1200S which I will get when I'm around 40.

So it kinda of pisses me off that I only have a finite nonrenewable source of cash right now. Does not help that the job market now sucks shit.

Enough griping la.

My bike reached the 2,000km mark. Woohoo! Was going to send it for servicing when it reaches 3,000km but the NTU bike rally on 15 Mar means my bike needs to go for its first servicing, Can't have my precious hubs and BB getting worn down by year-old dirt during the 128km route.

Went to Bukit Timah trail for a 2nd time. It wasn't half as scary as the first time, and the place where I lost control the previous time is now highly doable, with the right application of my brakes at the proper time.

What I really cannot take is the stupid climb up those never ending stairs near the end of the trail. After going through almost the whole course, to carry my bike up so many flights of stairs really is bloody irritating.

All in all, BT is the most challenging trail I've been on so far, the most tiring one also. But hey, there's still Kent Ridge in the running. After a few more times at BT, I'll be off to try kent ridge, which would probably have easier climbs than BT but the here say on the forums are that KR is the most technical trail when it comes to the descents.

So wish me luck, and hope I don't wreck my bike, cos I'm as broke as an Icelandic funds manager.

Houston, we have a problem.

2009-01-04T07:01:00.001-08:00

I just went to the Bukit Timah mountain bike trail with Isyraf on Friday.

One word to describe it, "HEAVEN!"

Beautiful singletrack, right smack in a rain forest, with streams flowing next to you, quarries to take your breath away, climbs steep enough to kill your legs from lactic acid poisoning, and last, but far from the least, descents long and steep enough to make you feel like a king for just being able to complete them without getting flung off your bike.

I would describe the trail as deceptively simple, but therein lies the danger. You climb a hill, push yourself, only to find a super long descent ahead of you, that is relatively even, or so it may seem from the top. Hurtling downhill, you find yourself enjoying the speed and trill of the descent. Suddenly, potholes, roots and rocks come into view in the middle of the descent.

You know you can't stop in time, for your tyres will skid on the slick forest floor, so jamming your brakes are out of the question. You know that you ride a hardtail bike, with suspension that's about to die, so ramming the obstacles at full speed would be suicide, so you have to select your speed carefully, not too fast or any deep hole or rut will get you flung off, not too slow or your momentum would not be enough to get you over the obstacles.

So all in all, it was a challenging trail. As you proceed further into the trail, once your apprehension starts to go away, and you start to get the hang of the descents, you start to relax. And there lies the trap that Bukit Timah has set for you.

I was going down one descent fast, relaxed, confident that the I could take anything the trail could throw at me. I took my hands off both brakes.

Big mistake.

Before I knew it, the straight descent had a left curve ahead. And as I got closer, fast, I saw rocks, and steps, one after the other, made out of small logs embedded in the soil. I checked my speed. 30km/h. Shit. Shit. I braked hard, but not so much so I would fish-tail.

I aimed to get out of the trail and onto the grass on the left, so that I wouldn't hit the logs and whatever else at that speed. Alas, it was too late. Trying to steer away from the logs, my front tyre and its insane sidewalls tried its best to climb the slippery berm, but it could not. I lost control and got flung off my bike, and rolled onto my back, thankfully onto the grass, and not into the trail.

I got up and dusted myself, and was highly thankful for my ass, which cushioned my fall. The only injury I got from that roll was the cuts my pedal studs gave me. My bike too, was uninjured, say for a few scratches on the side of the handlebar grips.

All in all, I'm going there again, this coming week, on a week day, cos I ORD next week! Woo hoo!

And yes, I'll be careful next time, and not be too overly confident despite the many other close calls.

Wah Leow EH!

2008-12-23T07:33:00.000-08:00

6 more working days to ORD!

And I almost got charged. Haha. But I was accused by someone (who hates me) for something I did not do. And this person (obviously not an NSF) brought heaven and earth down to try his utmost best to kill me.

And I emerged unscathed. :)

I must thank my two guardian angels (not NSFs also, but people of substantive rank) for supporting my stand.

You see, to sum this incident up, as I am Dept IC, I was held responsible for this incident. Either I give a name up, or I die.

And I must thank the investigative officer who gave me a chance to state my stand and eventually agreed with me.

And lo and behold, it was satisfying that the person responsible admitted to the act, and he was not from my Dept, so the person leading the witch hunt against me had it backfired. Cool right?

Anyway, problem settled, and I'm numero uno! Whee.

And today I talked with AC. I don't want my blog to get tagged on a search engine, so to put it simply, this rank is 4th from the top. Still don't know, go visit the force website.

Ya, anyways, he was in my office looking for my boss as usual. Then while waiting for her to finish talking to someone, he waited outside, where I was minding my own business. And he saw my biking mag.

I didn't know he was a biker too. Cool ah. He owns a GT Avalanche. Everything's custom except for his headset and saddle. Then he asked me what bike I was using. I told him my specs.

He then told me that his previous fork (a Suntour XCM) failed just this September. It caused him to fall, and he had a large gash on his leg, tearing a vein or something. And now he replaced it with a Fox Talas (drool). And I'm using the same fork (Suntour XCR 08) as his previous one.

Whoa. Fierce. His Fox fork is probably worth my drivetrain and wheelset combined. And well, I'm heavier than him, and probably not as skilled, so if my fork were to fail like his did, I think I'll be in deep deep shit. And I won't have the medical coverage I have now in cd.

But of course, he did say that he only goes to Bukit Timah and Ubin. So I guess my fork won't fail anytime soon la. I can't do the jumps that are at BT and I certainly don't have his fitness level, so count me out of the never ending climbs at Ubin.

Ah, I ramble. All I know is that for a super high ranking appoinment holder in cd, he is very approachable and friendly. Not to mention he seems rather young. Ah, a high flyer who still rides his GT Avalanche, even though he probably has the cash to buy a carbon fiber full-sus bike.

I really respect him, and perhaps 20 years from now, I too would have made it, drive my Audi R8 around, but still ride my humble Giant hardtail, repalced with a Fox Talas 2028 edition. Lol.

ORD!! Woo hoo!

Crack, Snap, Can I Have Your Money?!?

2008-11-27T06:25:00.000-08:00

I went to the trail with Isyraf and Muhd. Its been months since we went to the trail with Muhd, and barely 5 mins into the trail, a loud crack was heard from my rear wheel and my wheel locked suddenly, causing me to skid to a halt.

Basket! My chain snapped, hooked onto the rear derailleur, went one round, got stuck into the spokes and snapped both the derailleur hanger and one spoke.

This was almost the same thing that happened to my cheap GT, and since there were so many things wrong with it, I bought the Giant I have presently.

Hohoho. Year end bonus came early for the bike shop.

Derailleur hanger: $38
Middleburn 2nd Gear Chainring: $70
XT Chain: $35
XT Rear Derailleur: $80
XT Cassette: $80
XT Brakes: $300 w/o Rotor (I’ve been meaning to buy this for 3 months)
Mavic Spoke + Truing of wheel : $30

Total: $633

Shit! Shit. Shit.

I initially set aside cash for new brakes, but I spent double the budget because of the stupid stock Shimano chain snapping.

AND I still have to spend about $80 for a set of tyres cos both my tyres are about to be as bald as road tyres. AND new grips, about $35.

ARGH!

But you know what? Its all alright. My tuition cash may be gone, my holiday next year may be a little less relaxing, but my bike’s lighter, faster, and smoother than ever before. So I guess that’s priceless.

But now I can’t cycle to work even though I have about 28 more working days. Why? Cos I’m scared of scratching my new brake levers. Shiny XT levers. Woo!

And yes, I do have other passions beside biking. I love speeding in my sister’s Colt. But never again. Cos I almost killed 4 other people in the car yesterday. Stupid L-plate at Ubi didn’t check HER blindspot, swerved out from her lane, causing me to swerve and squeeze between her protruding bonnet in my lane and the car in the next lane at 70kmh. My front seat passenger swore that I was inches from hitting the L-plate. And I could have sworn I grazed the mirror of the car in the next lane.

But thank god, we emerged unscathed. Women drivers. Always telling guys to go slower. That’s cos they’re probably the gonggongs who block the way in the first place. They should tell others including themselves, beware of women drivers.

And last week, this woman taxi driver suddenly just made a right turn at a cross junction when I had the right of way to go straight. The motorcycle in front of me jammed his brakes so hard that his tyres locked and smoked. Luckily my reaction time was alright. I jammed my brakes and I stopped 20 cm behind the motorcycle. The bike’s front actually touched the side door of the taxi. And before the rider could even gain his balance on the bike, the woman sped away. I was too shocked to take her license plate. All I know was that she was a woman and her cab was a COMFORT cab.

And women cyclists on the pavement are a notch better. God knows how they can be so slow yet so adamant that they own the sidewalk and refuse to let other riders pass. Eh, hullo? I’m still faster than your stupid electric bike. Oh, and if I’m meeting a woman cyclist head on, instead of the gonggong keeping to the side of the pavement she goes to the middle of the pavement.

I have to CHOOSE which side to take. I must be a goalkeeper every morning when I ride to work ah? Then there are the times when I veer a certain direction, for example to my left, and from the middle of the pavement, she veers to my left also. Wah, I hate to jam my brakes ok. Each time my Panaracer tyres screech, is money gone. And the other rider can shoot me dirty looks?

Male cyclists are ok. Faster, yet calm, they veer to one side and stay there, if we’re meeting head on. If I say “Excuse me.” They allow me to pass. Likewise, I allow fitter or better equipped riders to pass me, no grudges, no “Aiyah!” and no dirty looks.

DISCLAIMER: Ah, but I digress and over generalise. Not all women cyclists or drivers are like what I said above. Some are alright, and some are even better drivers than the best of us. Oh, and pardon the poor English and spelling in this post. I’m bout to ORD and I don’t give a shit.

YES WE CAN!

2008-11-10T05:25:00.000-08:00

Obama won. Whoopee. I was so bored during my MC period when I had HFMD last week, I followed the US elections. I watched The Daily Show with Jon Stewart every day, and I could easily conclude that Obama was a superior candidate. He was smoother, more eloquent, and if this were American Idol, he had more showmanship than McCain. It helped that McCain had the most ‘louya’ campaign ever and the fact that everyday SNL and other comedy related channels in the US were making fun of the Palin-McCain partnership.

The most memorable incident was a CNN interview with a McCain aide. The aide was saying Obama mixes around with anti-Semitic people. And the aide named one person, a name I can’t recall.

The CNN interviewer rebuked his remark saying that the person he named had been absolved from knowing Obama. And the aide went on to say, “He mixes around with so many other anti-semitic people. We all know who they are.”

“Who are these others?” the CNN interviewer asked. “Name one.”

“We all know who. We don’t want to name names. We all know who.” The aide replied.

And it went on and on, with the aide trying to bullshit through his pathetic lies. The CNN presenter ended by saying, “You’re ridiculous.”

LOL. I think mindless mudslinging and millions of dollars spent in campaigns and time and energy dedicated to campaigning along with the division that political parties create makes me thankful to live in a country where we only have one gahmen.

But of course, we don’t have any political talk shows which are as funny as The Daily Show cos we can’t make fun of our politics. Also, with one gahmen, we can’t do anything when ERP gantries start going up right at our doorstep.

I still don’t understand why they put an ERP gantry at Eunos PIE. What’s more its $2 from 0700-0730 but $1 from 0730 onwards. Why do they charge more at the less jam packed time? If you want money from those who come out early also and those who send their kids to school, just ask lor.

I actually should join the gahmen. I have a brilliant idea to generate money. Instead of ERP gantries, which require maintenance, policing against errant drivers, and cheapskate Mercedes drivers who wait at the road shoulders to wait for the ERP charge to stop for the day, in turn causing accidents along the way, we should increase the petrol tax.

Make it like 300% instead of the current 40%. Make one litre of petrol cost $6. Then that’s perpetual ERP whether you go for a joyride in your car park, or in town. And if you decide to go to work during the peak period, the jams will guzzle your fuel ($6/litre) like free. To generate a double whammy, decrease the COE and road tax on higher CC cars, and increase it on lower CC and fuel efficient cars.

BOOM. $6 Billion dollars added to our treasury. LOL. Oh, and have a rebate for companies so that they would not be crippled by the fuel prices, ensuring our economy’s survival.

Oh, and package the whole idea to make it seem that the taxes are so high to prevent misuse of fossil fuels and to help our ailing environment. Much like ERP is “to manage the jams during the peak periods.” Yeah, right.

Oh and back to the Obama thing. I liked him, and I thought he was a much better candidate than McCain in terms of his oratorical skills and overall campaign ‘suave-ness’. But I didn’t think he would win. For the reason of his skin colour.

I would’ve thought the ‘Bradley effect’ where white voters voice support for a minority only to reverse their decision in the privacy of the polling booth would make him lose.

I was utterly shocked. I even watched his acceptance speech with awe the moment I got home that day. All I know is that the US voted well, and wisely. But if he cocks up, hoho. I don’t think there would be any black president in the near or long-term future for many years to come. I hope he can deliver change. He looks so promising.

Yes we can!

Anyways, I talk cock a lot already. And yes, I still have no idea why my immune system is so weak to viral attacks. I have not needed antibiotics for 2 years. Namely cos I don’t get bacterial infections anymore. But I’ve been getting viral infections. Viral meningitis last year and HFMD last week, both viral diseases. Shit man. And the next greatest pandemic is potentially a viral one, not bacterial. Better work hard, get rich and buy a bunker worth of Tamiflu. Lol.

Clouds Can be A Blessing

2008-10-30T11:21:00.000-07:00

Life's unpredictable. It can be a pain. But one always has got to look for the silver lining in life.

I lost a LOT of money due to this sub-prime nonsense.
Silver Lining: I'm not the only one. But I am one of the few who lost relatively peanuts. And its not my life savings nor my income that's gone. But it still hurts cos I could have gotten that damn nice Specialized bike with whatever parts I wanted with cash to spare for servicing.

I contracted Hand, Foot and Mouth Disease this week.
Silver Lining: LOL. The 40.3C high fever was a bitch, the painful and itchy sores on my face are not funny BUT its gone now. And I am enjoying the week off on MC. Though I'm a little bored. Finished Fable 2, going to pre-order Gears of war 2. Plus when I get back, i would have only 8 weeks of NS nonsense to endure.

Tuition's over. I'm broke.
Silver lining: I have total freedom at nights. I can relax and sleep earlier. So much so that I can wake up earlier to cycle to work. But the downside is rather serious though. I have to watch my moolah consumption. And I hate that cos I love to spend on whatever I want. I love my disposable income. I stopped wondering a long time ago why my savings are so pathetic. But at least I live life, eh. Still can earn some more cash..

So you see, coming from someone who just contracted a disease fresh off the playground, (my niece had the HFMD and passed it to me) there's a silver lining everywhere. You just have to look.

Oh, and now that I have only 8 weeks till ORD, I am scared shitless of what life ahead holds. Uni life. Have all my brains been sucked dry by the stupidity of CD?

I'm afraid that after rising so easily to the top of the food chain in my dept, not very much attributed to my skills, but more so to me being relatively much better than the competition (Not looking so much at their paper qualifications, which don't say much in the first place, but more to their lousy work ethic which makes even a lazy bugger like me look good), I'm afraid that uni may be a culture shock where things don't come automatically. I guess we all have to go through the same trials. Unless you're a girl, then you don't get a 2 year break from studying, and you get less pay in the future. Lol.

Silver lining's everywhere. :)

To the Fan/s

2008-10-19T03:14:00.000-07:00

Its been a long time. Fan/(s) want updates. I had many, but now most of them have been forgotten. What can I say? I’m lazy.

I’ve been cycling to work for the past 7 working days straight. I must say what started out as something relaxing, something to imbue my lifestyle with some semblance of good health has turned out to much of a chore.

Yes, I do arrive earlier in the office even though I wake up at the same time (cos the journey by bike is faster than the bus, blame the Eunos jam) and yes I do save around $50 a week on cab rides (because most of the time I don’t bother waking up for the bus and just take a damn cab) but I have one large irking problem.

Biking to work kills the fun on weekends. I have no dying urge to go to the trail anymore. It could be due to the fact that the Tampines MTB park has gotten boring after going there for the millionth time, or it could be due to the fact that I ride my bike everyday.

Bah, but tomorrow’s Monday. A whole new week to ride my bike.

Curious to know the distance from Loyang to Ubi? 12.05km, just a 30-45 min bike ride, depending on how late I leave the house, and hence how hard I pedal to get to work on time. At least I save lots of cash now, cos I wake up early, which is expecially prudent since I’m now only earning my CPL pay, with no more tuition cash to supplement my expendable income. I guess I can say goodbye to that Trigon Carbon-fiber stem I’ve been wanting to get to match my handlebar.

Speaking of work, I’m now the highest ranking NSF in my whole department. I’m Dept IC, and have been for 2 months now, but there was always the other 2 CPLs who always prevented my superiority complex from reaching nirvana. Now that they’re gone, I’m the alpha male. The big kahuna. Hoho. But I’m glad to say that I’ve learnt a bit from time as boss in Biz Club. And I’ve even imbued a few CD lessons into the mix.

Has anyone seen the markets lately? Bloody shit. The HSI has dropped by more than half. And so has the value of my unit trusts. Shit SHIT!

Ah, well, I’m still young. Plenty of time to hold, regain capital and hold some more and then gain dividends. Haha. Maybe I’ll be able to buy a few Macdonald’s ice-cream cones for you in about 3-6 years time with my gains. That is, if I gain back my injected capital in the first place.

Vishnu has been in Australia for training for a few weeks now. Our outings have been kinda boring now that my Xbox’s spoilt and there’s no Vishnu’s house to go to watch vids and play games. And on the very day that Vishnu comes back next month, Sing is flying to HK for a long holiday since that lucky bastard ORDs on 11 Nov.

And I only ORD in Jan. I’ve been feeling the repetition of my job killing me slowly, with each passing day.

Upon self-reflection, I think that I have the potential to be rather successful at work. But at the same time, a certain dichotomy exists. I have no holding power. I only work hard, fast and smart if there’s a reward at the end, be it promotion, title or bonus.

Take for example, in school. I worked hard to secure a title in my CCA. Thereafter, I worked hard to prove that I was deserving of the title. And after that, I worked to win the competitions to provide the capital for the café. Then I worked hard to set it up, and then launch it. Of course, I wasn’t the only one working hard, but you get the general idea la.

After that? I was lifeless. I had no idea what to do next, and I was just bidding my time to the handover and the A levels.

Last year, I worked hard to prove myself as the most capable, and in CD, it ain’t that difficult. I got one stripe. And then I worked hard to gain another. And then complacency set in. Then I worked hard again, to become dept head. But I didn’t work that hard to get it cos it was more or less mine already. :)

And now, I’m just bidding my time to Jan.

So there are two ways on how my working life may pan out.

Scenario 1: I have enormous starting power. I will be invaluable as long as there is an end in sight. But once I reach the end, I cannot maintain that peak, unless there’s another obstacle to climb. That means I would need to keep starting up new projects and seeing them through till the launch and then I’ll have to leave to go to the next startup. Could become a good venture capitatist..?

Scenario 2: I start out promising. Then I fail to maintain that upward trend. Upper management decides I’m a fading star. I get passed off the next promotion, cos there’s another shining star. I get pissed off. And I join the civil service. LOL.

Dan says I’m T-800 and he’s the T-1000, that is, I’m the old model Terminator, and he’s the new liquid metal Terminator, superior in all aspects.

That’s not true Dan. I’ve reached the highest possible position I could ever get with the opportunities presented to me. Ya la, can get SGT if I pass IPPT one. But cannot la.

But you have something to prove, and that’s why you have fire in your belly. Lol. You should choose another movie analogy for the both of us. I’m, Rocky, old, bored and complacent. And you’re the new guy, with youth and determination to win something. But remember, be it Terminator or Roacky, I still whoop your ass. Lol.

Ok, good night people. I’m going to go and eat dinner. Now I have an excuse to eat anything I want cos I bike to work. And some may wonder why biking never has any effect on me… Haha. Night.

The Happening

2008-08-24T06:44:00.000-07:00

What i thought was an impossibility happened. My mom let me drive the car alone today. Hoho.

Thrice in a day some more, though to do errands for her la. I must say the Cefiro is nice to speed in. But, I do speed with caution, only when the road's super clear.

Haha. Then another impossibility happened. My sister loaned me her Mitsubishi Colt today. All the way till wed. Haha. Cos she's going to visit her overseas project again. Woohoo. I can finally drive to camp. Pity I can't park in camp. Stupid rules.

Anyways, I want to go to Johore again. Super cheap food and chewing gum, not to mention cheap adidas stuff are aplenty, be it imitation apparel or the original thing, they're all cheap.

But the food there. Gastranomical debauchery. MMMMM!

And what's up with the god damned weather? Rain, rain, rain. Wah leow eh. I brought my bike out 3 times this weekend, only to have to turn back twice at Tampines, and once when I hadn't even left my compound. Crap man.

I had IPPT recently. Haha! What a joke. My results were never stellar the year before, but now, they're just shameful. lol.

And when I wanted to resume trail biking to get back my biker's toned legs, it kept pouring the whole damn day.

Guess this is karma. I get to drive now, with no paranoid safety-drivers beside me, and I can't ride my bike. Its a fair trade, for now.

Well, till another boring post. See ya.

Random Ramblings

2008-08-10T04:44:00.000-07:00

Got to thank Vishnu for the tickets to the NDP preview last week. Luckily it didn't rain like it did yesterday.

Got to thank Aud for getting me awake before noon on a saturday. You extended my weekend by half a day.

Its been a year since I entered the markets, and I have capital depreciation of 15%. FCUK.

Could have bought my Stumpjumper with that money.

I ORD in 5 months. I want to go on a biking vacation, maybe bike up to Kota Tinggi or Desaru and relax there. And by bike, I mean cycle. Any takers crazy enough to cycle about 200km with me? And to cycle back? Oh, we'll be cycling through the plantations, through relativlely flat trails. Biking experience needed though. Must be able to change a flat tyre faster than me. I take about 7 mins now, Isyraf takes about 1 min. So anywhere between that region would be fine.

I also want to go on a proper vacation to either Thailand, or Indonesia. Cheap currency and cheap shopping are a must. Think Isyraf and Vishnu are set. Any other takers?

Oh, my sister is super irritating. Drive slower, careful this, careful that. Wah leow. I'm a better driver than you were when you passed ok? And I can park perfectly at my first attempt, albeit in an empty lot.

But what irks me the most is that she took over the wheel this weekend in 3 instances when I had to ferry people to my sister's house for a party, because she said I drive too slowly. I DRIVE SLOW TO KEEP YOU QUIET. Argh.

When I buy my Audi R8, the closest she'll get to it would be on the passenger side. No paranoid drivers allowed in my future car.

I'm very tired of staying in limbo. My personal development is hampered by NS. Its now a waiting game. ORD, then I can resume leading a productive lifestyle. 5 months.

I'm boring you, I know, cos I'm making myself bored with my ramblings.

To another time, when I'm not so pissed off.

Going the Distance

2008-07-19T01:49:00.000-07:00

I bought my cyclocomputer in mid May this year. And from that time till now, I've finally reached the 1,000km mark. Woohoo!

Think of all the kilometres on beautiful singletrack, the picteresque scenery from Ubin and Tamp, the busy roads and the many idiots on sidewalks I so long to just run over and 2 flat tyres I've had at the most inconvinient times.

Ah, so many memories forged with my cycling kakis in just 1,000km, many good and some painful ones.

And actually ah, I've cycled much more than 1000km on my current bike. The lapse from End Apr to mid May when I bought the cyclocomputer should've added at least 500km to my mileage. Haha.

Not bad ah, considering I only touch my bike twice a week. Anyways, I've decided to buy my Stumpjumper only after I analyse whether I have the time in uni to use it properly. But in all probability, I will end up buying one.

That is, if I survive long enough. I was on the way back on my bike and yet again, I almost got knocked down by a car, at the bottom of the kickass hill from the guardhouse to my block. This time, an Audi had the honour of almost whacking me. I swear man, I know its my fault I'm speeding down the hill when even cars slow down to avoid the 3 humps down the hill, BUT, I'm not a car. And just cos the lane is free doesn't mean you can veer into MY lane.

Bloody P-plate drivers.

LOL. I FINALLY drove today. Took my sister's Mitsubishi Colt for a spin. I've been damned pissed off with my mum cos she's been making excuses for these past 2 weeks saying she has no time to accompany me on the Cefiro for my maiden drive. My other sister with her MPV also offered, and ended up making excuses. In the end, it was the other sister, the one who never offered who actually stepped up to the plate.

And my sister is damn cool la. "Oi. Faster la." were the few words she said to me on my drive from my house to IKEA. I'm like already going 80km/h on the Pasir Ris main road.

So going 100km/h on the main road is allowed in her car?!? Woohoo. Damn cool la.

I was nervous at first cos I thought she would've been a stiff for safety.

Best virgin drive ever. 100kmh on road and 150kmh on the PIE. Lol. And the Colt's steering is so light, it felt like my XBOX steering.

How can biking on the road be fun when one can drive on the road? Stupid roadies.

Ok la, the rain's stopped. I want to see whether I can go do a round at Tamp... Haven't been biking as much because there's my routine of waking up Sat morning to bike has been put on hold for a short while... Somehow, the weekend seems shorter by waking up later.. Weird, cos I sleep later which means I'm awake the same no. of hours.. One of the mysteries of life...

Like a Smelly Jackfruit Falling

2008-07-05T04:25:00.000-07:00

I'm definitely going to get myself one of these... A Specialized Stumpjumper. OOOOOO. Been saving up. I'm proud to say I've accumulated a whopping $6.80 in my Stumpjumper Fund. Only $5,500++ to go. Hoho.

I'm now a bonafide mat. Last weekend alone, I nearly got into 4 road accidents while I was on my bike. 2 at traffic junctions whilst crossing the road, which were my fault, and 2 more while I was cornering at the petrol station near my house.

My rear tyre was almost flat, for some unkonwn reason, and I didn't realise it, so as I was speeding down the hill, and leaning into the turn, my rear tyre slipped out under me, and I almost fell, but I managed to reccover. And being a future unsafe motorbike rider, I tried weaving in between 2 adjacent cars between petrol pumps, and my rear tyre slipped again when I tried going around the car. Thank god the cars stopped.

Then earlier that day, something stupid happened to me. After a round at the MTB park, Aud needed to go home. So we got Pocari from Cheers. As we were parting ways, cos I wanted to do a few more rounds at Tamp, I leaned into the turn as I usually do, but this time, my pedal struck the ground as I was turning and I fell.

WAH! So embarassing. I fell to the side, my knee was slightly grazed, and I hit the side of my head on the ground. My first fall in close to 3 months. Hoho. What a humbling fall. I guess I'm not ready to go buy my Kawasaki... Haha.

So many near accidents, and guess what? I got my driving license. Haha. No points deducted for failure to check safety, and the next day, 2 cars almost knock me down. Lol. I guess there'll be no motorbike license for me...

And despite all the luck I've been having lately, I got to return something back to fate. I got to do IPPT. Yes, I was exempted from IPPT due to my knee injury, but now, somehow, I got called. And my beloved officer has taken the liberty to train me personally. He said he might as well do so, as he's training for some marathon. Wah leow eh. After his PT session on Monday, my whole upper body hurts like hell.. Argh.

On a sidenote, I think these training sessions will be a blessing in disguise. I'll be fitter and closer to acheiving my goal of completing 100km of trail continuously by next Feb.

Oh, and to you skeptics out there, I'm fitter than I look. Lol. At least this applies to that guy who thought he could easily lap me during the run, but instead found it hard to even catch up. And puking after the run because of your 'headache' didn't add much street cred to you. lol.

You owe me an Iced tea, bub.

'Breakfast is the most important meal of the day' Mum's quote No. 10989

2008-06-14T02:37:00.000-07:00

Went on one of my solo biking trips today. My trail trip with Aud was postponed to tmw instead, Isyraf had soccer, Muhd had duty.

But occasional solo trips are actually quite stimulating. I find that my 'breakthroughs' are achieved either through solo accidental attempts at an obstacle or under the watchful eyes of Isyraf.

But then, today was another dramatic event...

I dislike breakfasts. I have no appetite for them, so I usually skip them, save for a banana or two before a morning exam, which is said to improve your concentration by >20%, I can't recall what Siu Sing said 2 yrs back.

But I digress.

I woke up late again today, as there was no incentive to wake up early. It was noon, and yet it wasn't that bright, it was a little cloudy. Ah, perfect conditions to hit the trail.

Got my things and left for Tamp.

Aside from not touching my bike for 2 weeks since the bike rally, and not hitting the trail hard in 3 weeks, I felt good and confident that today I can work to my new personal goal: To do 100km in the Tamp trail by December, and by Feburary next year, I want to join the Bike Asia 100km or equivalent non-competetive event at the trail.

So I reached the main area, put on my helmet, and went on my way to the start point. Earlier on, I decided that I should cheong my first round, to set the standard for further rounds, as I gain more stamina from future training sessions. Or so Confidentman thought.

So I was heaving and panting like a mad dog. Being rather familiar with the trail, I LOVED the corners and the ruts. Hoho. Finally my suspension's showing its skills. Its a stock suspension some more, one of the few things on my bike I didn't change.

Covered 1.5km. I missed doing the small drop at the beginning of the Cannondale section. Made me feel so pro. Hoho. "Biking is like a million times more 'shiok' if you go fast, tethering on the point of losing control, yet maintaining it..." I thought to myself.

I reached the more uphill section of the trail. 'Doing well, so cheong again,' Confidentman thought to himself. So I was panting and panting up the slope, down and up again...

'Wah leow, the sun is so hot.. Dint do trail hard enough fo so long, spent 2 weeks at home eating and playing GTA 4, cannot tahan..," Not-so-Confidentman thought to himself. Finally, I reached a very gravelly uphill.

Riding uphill on gravel is like riding in gooey, wheel engulfing mud, but when you're tired, gravel behaves like damn glue. Finally as I couldn't take breathing like a hamster on adrenaline, I stopped. Pant, pant, pant. Wah leow eh, I felt like I was running my first 5 click run at BRTC again.

Ok, drama time..

I felt light-headed, couldn't focus and I had a sudden migraine.

'Shit la. Heatstroke ah? No one knows I'm here.'

I felt my pulse, it was slow. My breathing was fast and shallow.

'*%$@!!!! Didn't 2 people just die suddenly in the army, a few days back?'

I slumped myself on the handlebar, hoping that my light-headedness would subside. I was feeling like I was going to pass out.. So I got off my bike, threw my bike down and looked for a place to sit on the singletrack. But there was no place to sit. In the end, I couldn't take it anymore..

I keeled over, and puked. And puked some more.

Wtf? Then, I just sat in the sun, on the singletrack, drinking my water, for like 15 mins.

After puking, I felt so much better, but what was rather embarassing is: I keeled over 1.8km into the Cannondale section. Lol.

After that, a little dazed, I finished the remaining portion of the section at my normal speed, which was much much more comfortable.

But being a little dazed, I didn't see that the recent rain had caved in a small section of the concrete-reinforced section, making a rather deep, long hole. My front wheel went into that hole at full speed, as it was at the last turn, downhill towards the end of the section.

Have you seen cows fly? Lol. As the suspension rebounded, the bike bounced and went forwards, missing the turn. I think I may have caught air, I'm not sure. But I didn't fall. Managed to hop over the length of the singletack. Wah, I feel so pro.

Can go to Gangsa already ah, Isyraf?

Anyways, I left the trail after that section, and went to the Esso. Bought 1 Pocari Sweat, 2 bottles of Coke Lime. Ah, sugar, in all its glory, here to rescue me.

After about half an hour of deciding whether to go home, eat lunch or go to the trail again, I decided to hit the trail again. So after glugging down all my drinks, eating a few Sultana crackers, and resting for another half hour, I hit the trail again.

The sun wasn't as hot already, and I was feeling so fresh from the influx of sugar. I went faster than my normal speed, just a notch out of my confort zone, not near the cardiac-arrest zone like the previous time.

Finished the Cannondale section, the Big Hill section, the Log section, and the Jungle section.

I felt quite happy with myself, finshed all that, 7.5km worth of trail in 40 mins. I think Isyraf would have 'loved' the conditions in the Jungle. The mud was so soft it engulfed my entire rim+wheel height. I think its about 4 cm deep of mud. Shiok ah!

And today I was on a roll in the jungle. Stuck in the mud, I did a trackstand, and pedalled forward. For subsequent puddles, when the front got stuck, I 'Power-Pedalled' (coined by Isyraf), that is the front wheel is lifted out of the puddle . Whoo.

Plus, I did a trackstand while on the balance logs! Wah leow eh. Aren't you proud of me?

Also did the 2 uphill switchbacks I couldn't seem to do previously, along with one of the super steep berms. All that's left that I can't do is the super steep berm before the start of the Cannondale section.

And if all this wasn't enough, I did another round, trackstand and all. Woohoo.

But reader beware, don't be stupid, and do eat your breakfast.

The LONGEST Weekend

2008-06-08T05:18:00.000-07:00

Wah... I've been sick since friday. Being sick during the weekend is the worse thing that could ever happen to anyone.

Then the weather is another story. Rain, RAIN, rain. I couldn't even meet up with Audrey yesterday to hit the trails again.

On a side note, I was super disappointed not to be able to go, cos we only meet up weekly, so if we miss one week, I'll have to wait another week. I also wanted to see how she would perform at the trail that day. Her first attempt at the trail was to put it embarassingly, 2-3 times better than my first attempt on my Aggressor. Plus I think in 3 mths, she'll be the one teaching me new stuff. Lol.

Anyways, till next Sat then.

Then today, it still was so cloudy and rainy. I couldn't stand it anymore so I went out to the trails despite my feverish aches and lethargy. But in the end, even with Isyraf's company, we were still not in the mood to hit the trail.. So we ended up doing a round at the dirt path that led to nowhere.

Wah, I feel so bored.. Its like after attempting the trails these past few weeks , sans body armour, after doing round island cycling like a roadie, cycling is starting to... lose its thrill?!?!

No la. I must really be feeling unwell.

And no Isyraf/Sing, my thirst, lethargy, sleepiness are not signs of diabetes or renal failure/impairment. Not funny... Though, I better wean myself off that damn Coke Zero.

Mmm, smooth, silky, guilt-free Coke Zero.

Bike Rally Man

2008-06-01T21:35:00.000-07:00

After a nice nap at the end point, we regained some energy. But compare how fresh Aud looks, while I look like I should sleep for the next 1000 years.

BUT I SURVIVED!!! 128km of S'pore roads. And I made it home, sans cardiac arrest. Whee! Audrey survived too, in, fact, she wasn't as visibly tired as me. LOL.

Now let me recount the journey as best as I can possible can. Better drink your coffee first :)

The day started at 0430a.m. I got ready, both excited, yet reluctant to face the daunting hot roads that were to come in a few hours time. Audrey's father was super nice to pick me up from my house to send us over to Vishnu's house, where we had parked our bikes the day before.

And Vishnu and his parents were nice enough to allow thier house to be a temp carpark to 2 bikes. :)

Then we headed over to a petrol station on the way to east coast to pump our tyres to a roadie's pressure of 55 psi.

When we reached east coast, we registered and met up with Audrey's classmates. Super nice ppl. Very on also. That's why vishnu needs to start cycling. Lol.

Anyways, I had the lowest IQ there, cos all of her classmates, including her, are CN Yang scholars from all over SEA, if I'm not wrong. Smart, witty, enthusiastic and outdoorsy scholars. Very contradictory to my perception of international scholars. But little did I know I was about to meet another person who would correct my perception on brainy people.

Before we started off, we had to attach the number tags to our bikes, so I went to get a pair of scissors to cut the excess tags off, because our bike are pretty, and I dun want their beauty to be ruined by stupid dangling tags.

Then all of a sudden, I heard, "Zul, Zul!!". I turned around. There's no one else I know here. "Zul, zul!' and I saw this man beckoning me to come over. I looked at him, puzzled.

You know who he was? He's http://www.blogger.com/profile/15602079103603710402. He left a comment on my blog previously on one of the posts. He an NUS lecturer on Biological something. Me and my bad memory. But he saw me frmm like 20m away, and he remembered who I was! After talking to him, he remembered my blog entries, my many falls and my experiences. We met him again during the journey, and when he met Audrey, he even remembered stuff from her blog, like how she enjoyed her new bike cos her old one was super heavy.

Holy, Crap! He's like superman. I ask you readers a simple question now. Will you be able to recognise a person you've never met, from 20m away and he's not facing you? Would you be able to remember details from this stranger's blog, details from a month ago? Would you be able to remember who he was friends with? He must be like Super-super-genetically enhanced smart. LOL. Plus he's super friendly, and he organises MTB classes for novices, where they practise stuff at Ubin. They teach jumps, something which I can't do cos I don't have the guts. Haha. But, I'll definitely go, cos if everyone else is a novice MTBer, then at least it won't be so embarrassing when I go splat at the quarry. Haha.

We also met many more interesting people, like the Cannondale shop owner, the one who carried Aud's and my bike up to his shop, so that we could park it nicely while we took a look at his wares. He's the Cannondale shop owner, and he treated us so nicely that day. Not like LandT cycles. Made Muhd and I wait while the 'regulars' cut queue.

I also met this other NUS lecturer. His bike was a Santa Cruz Blur. Full suspension. Isyraf's dream bike. Haha. He's been touring all over the world, India, Europe and other places on his bike. Cool guy, also super friendly.

Met the Scott guy who showed me how to do the balancing beam at Tamp MTB park and a whole host of other people.

OKOK!!!

Now for the Bike rally itself. We got into position, and the air horn blew. Wah, I expected a sprint and scramble. But it was kind of anti climatic. So funny. Cos the group moved off so slowly. Finally, after 20m, the roadies started zipping off into the lead, never to be seen again. Haha.

The first checkpoint was Labrador Park. 20-30km+. ( I had an odometer, but I took more note of total distance and speed to pace myself, rather than point to point distance) Wah, I was still fresh. Confident that this would be a cynch. Haha.

When we arrived there, the fast roadies had already rested and formed their group again and went off. But we just arrived, so we had our share of free flow Gatorade and Gardenia Buns. So Audrey and I waited for 40 mins for the 2nd group to form. But!!! It was an 'own time, own target, move on' kinda thing. So we had lost our lead against the ppl lagging behind. Even some of Aud's classmates had gone off without us knowing. So we set off, with road marshalls to guide us at the turns and stuff.

Look how fresh I am. And look at the view. I didn't know this kind of places still existed on the mainland.
My phone couldn't capture the rainbow in the background. But the view rocks.

Other people at the Labrador 1st checkpoint.

On the way to NTU SRC, which was the 2nd checkpoint, we overtook so many people, including her classmates who left earlier. LOL. From then on, our motto was, "Slowly, but surely, we'll overtake people."

At the 2nd checkpoint, we had more food and Gatorade. Then we set off for Kranji, the 3rd checkpoint. At Kranji, we decided to swop bikes.

Then Audrey asked me, "My saddlebag with my phone and stuff is on my bike. Is it ok?"
To which I replied, "Its ok. We won't get separated as long as we cycle together."

Wah leow. BIG mistake. The drama that ensued was worthy of its own movie.

So we swopped bikes and headed to Yishun stadium. We were near the Mandai area, where there are long muscle killing gradual climbs but nice long gradual slopes also. But, it started to pour heavily. Yet, we decided there was no point stopping, cos its better to rest at the Yishun checkpoint.

Then the drama started. Rain was beating down on my face. The wind was killer. I tilted my head down to use my helmet's visor as a shield. The rain dissolved the sweat on my face, and it went into my eyes. I couldn't see. My eyes were painful from the sweat and rain water that entered, and my specs were fogging up, and I was speeding down the long downhill, with one eye closed, and the other squinting. The noise from the rain and the speeding cars beside me was too great. I had to see, so i slowed down to wipe my eyes.

THEN, I turned around, to make sure she was ok. But she was gone! I looked ahead and there was no one there. AH!!! I waited a little, still no sign of her. I started to panic.

I backtracked up one hill. Still no sign. Panic built up.

I backtracked up another hill. Still no sign. I backtracked up another hill. Still no sign of her.

Argh!! I was super scared. Then I saw a road marshall and asked him to lodge a description with the next and previous checkpoint for any sign of her.

Then, one of her friends saw me, and cycled towards me. He was constantly behind us so I was hoping he had seen her. But no, he hadn't. So he made a few calls to the other classmates. No one picked up. So since she wasn't behind us, I decided to go to the next checkpoint. I gave the road marshall my hp no. and sped off to the next checkpoint at Yishun stadium.

And there she was, nice and dry, safe. Haha. Wah, I was super relieved and as relieved as I was, I was super tired also.

So you know what happened? When the sweat stung my eyes, and I slowed down, she sped down the hill. And I didn't realise she had overtaken me. So she was waiting for me up ahead, while I waited for her BEHIND her. Lol. And both of us backtracked, looking for one another. So she thought I was missing, and vice-versa.

As much as it was a nerve-wracking experience, in retrospect, its quite funny, don't you think?

So we set off once again to Serangoon Sec school, the fifth checkpoint. And I think the heat of the day and the distance was getting to us, but more so to me. When we reached the school, I gulped down Gatorade like no tmw. I had a splitting headache to boot. In the end, we rested at some study area, and she gave me time to sleep my headache off. I slept like a log for 15 mins. But I woke up refreshed, but the headache still lingered. But it was ok, cos there was only 36km left.

Then we left Serangoon. Once we reached Sengkang, I felt a little fresher. And once we reached Pasir Ris, I was back in business. I was proabaly dehydrated, but the Gatorade i drank earlier got working, albeit a little slowly.

Then came the biggest test of all. The long straight slightly uphill road from Downtown East to the Shell station near my house. It was a test, cos I love to speed down that slightly inclined hill. I've attained 53.3kmh down that stretch of road, not because its steep, but because its a very long SLIGHT incline. But I never go home using that route. Cos i hate the lack of shade and i hate long climbs, I prefer short and steep, so I can get it over and done with.

What's worse, is that we were both going to past by our houses. Haha. The temptation was great, but the smell of victory was only 20km away!

Finally, past the shell station came the very nice long downhill raod to changi village. On the park connector, my top speed would be 48kmh cos i will have to stop at the traffic light and there'll always be another slow cyclist or pedestrian clogging up the connector. Since I was on road this time, and the traffic light was green, woohoo. Solid. From the Shell and down the hill my speed touched 61kmh. Wah. SHIOK! I felt like I was riding a white Super Four motorbike. Haha. I know you're smiling Isyraf.

Anyway, once we reached the Changi checkpoint, we decided not to rest and chiong to the end point since we knew the route so well. This time we decided that since we were on the road the whole day, we should try doing Changi Coast rd on the road itself and not on the connector. And we were faster on the road. There were no other cyclists, no branches and no turns. The road was straight all the way for 9km. Woohoo.

When we finally reached east coast, we decided to make it a photo finish. We overtook a few other riders and one safety official on his super fast foldable bike. And we went through the finishing line feeling very happy and accomplished. :)

After that, we were given a finishers' shirt. I never had a finshers' shirt before. So cool. We bought green tea that was on offer, and collected our goody bags.

After that we laid our things down and did what champions do after a race. SLEEP! lol.

We slept in the middle of the open field, near the hawker centre at the beach, along with other tired riders.

Best sleep ever la. Until I was awoken by the stupid DJ and the horrible live band.

It was already 4.40p.m so we decided to stay for the lucky draw which was to start at 7p.m. So we ate dinner at the hawker centre with one of her classmates, Mi Cheng, if I'm not wrong.

Anyways, she commented earlier in the day that I didn't eat much during the journey. But I think she now knows why. I can't eat and then cycle. I eat bread and stuff to have enough free sugar in my blood. The rest of the energy is drawn from my own 'reserves'. LOL. But when everything has ended, and dinner comes, my my. I replenish all that has been used up with a vengeance. Chicken rice, BBQ chicken wings, satay and sugar cane. LOl. Truly, I more than made up for the energy lost during the race.

Alas, we didn't win anything during the lucky draw. And we cycled back home.

But all in all, its was a fantastic day. I became a roadie for a day. And now I think roadies are quite ok. They're nice ppl. Even though, I find that doing distance cycling all the time is boring, but so is trail all the time. So its best to alternate between the two disciplines of cycling.

BUT! Since road bikes can only do road, and MTBikes can do both road and trail, I guess MTBers win. Haha.

MTBers : 500 pts
Roadies: -100 pts

LOL. Thanks for reading, if you read the whole thing, that is. Well good day, I'm ending here cos my fingers are numb.

To Love Is Merely Human

2008-05-29T09:03:00.000-07:00

I'm truly in love. I just spent close to 2 hours washing every nook and cranny of my bike, buffing it, and polishing the fork, to a shine I haven't seen since the first time I brought it to the trails at Ubin.

Why bother when I'll dirty it the instant my tyre touches the trail? Cos I ain't going to the trail this weekend:)

The NTU bike rally is this Sun. Roadies and chauvanistic Scott MTBers with their shiny bikes from all over the nation will be converging for this event.

And with the amount of time and money I've put into my bike, I can't have it look like an ugly step-sister.

And.. Inadverently, I've become a roadie. Shiny bike. And proud of it. LOL.

But yes, I'm really proud of my bike. Its lighter, and faster than any other bike I've ridden, or any other bike that anyone I personally know owns. Almost every single part is not stock, but was handpicked by me and assembled accurately by a trusted bike mechanic.

My Hand made Carbon fiber handlebar from japan holds all my important controls. Avid Juicy 5 hydro brakes, Shimano Deore LX drivetrain, Deore Shifters, Cateye cyclocomputer.

I love my handmade in France, Mavic wheelset. My Scott saddle supports my ass perfectly. My Specialized grips give me ergonomic comfort on the road, and superb grip on trail. Lastly, my Panaracer tyres are too good to be true.

Ahh. Satisfaction. Now I know why some people would pay a premium just to buy a huge BMW or Audi when a Camry would suffice. Its the quality and elegance and sheer enjoyment one feels when one drives such a masterpiece of engineering. And one can always practise his animalistic urges with such a beautiful machine on the trail (or Malaysia for cars. lol.)

Haha. Enough showing off. Enough being a roadie or that idiot neighbour with the Scott bike that never touched trail before.

Aside from being super nice, there's only one chief reason why I've paid so much money for a bike. It handles like a dream on the trail. And considering that I'm a relatively horrible rider compared to Isyraf, this bike helps to make up for my lack of experience, albeit a LITTLE little bit. Haha.

I've gotta buy that full-suspension Specialized Stumpjumper. OOOOOO. But only IF i have the time and MONEY in uni/work. If ONLY...

Oh, and wish me luck in attempting the 128km rally. Hope I don't get a flat cos I intend to pump my tyres at 55psi, something I've tried only twice. Haha.

Roadies beware, I'm going to run your skinny bikes over and break your carbon fiber frames! If I can catch you. Or while you go to the loo. Mwahaha.

This Is Not A Specialized Advertistment

2008-05-25T05:46:00.000-07:00

Oh, I LOVE my Panaracer tyres. They have damn bloody good grip on singletrack and cornering on both trail and road is oh so 'Keira Knightley' smooth.

BUT, the rolling resistance on road is very pronounced. It feels like my tyres are flat. Too many knobs make the tread unsuitable for flat ground. But I guess trail stability is a good trade for low rolling resistance.

And today, my drivetrain gave problems. I initially thought it was my derailleur, but to my horror, my chain is dry!!!

4 months of weekly washing and i dint lube my chain, and now one of the links is stuck. After a long washdown and generous teflon lube, which costs a bomb btw, its ok now.

I really can't wait for the bike rally. 128km of glorious road, plus I get to know the route to NTU and back. And that's excluding the return journey to the East Coast start/end pt from home.

So hyped up. What's more I have a good cycling partner for company. But I'm afraid, if this person does not attempt any singletrack in the near future, she'll turn into a trail rider's worse nightmare...

A ROADIE!!! Ahh!!!

Bikes are supposed to look like this:

Weighing about 10.5kg, and able to do anything, depending on the rider's skill level. Jumps and dropoffs for Isyraf, and nice technical but not too technical, singletrack for me. Even so, it still is light enough to go on the road, and even I can maintain 28kmh for long distances. Maybe more, if I ever lay my hands on it.

Price: US$7400

Its NOT supposed to look like this:

5.5kg featherweights, meant for speed. An average person can maintain 34mh on one of these. Good right? NOT. One kerb ride up, and your $1000 wheelset is permanently damaged. 1 ride along a sandy patch of grass near a traffic light and your $900 hubs and bearings are gone. 1 blob of mud, and your precious drivetrain is rendered useless.

Price: US$8500

Not only are roadies useless just to gain a bit more speed, they wear weird clothes that show every small detail of their anatomy. Which is gross, considering most roadies are guys, who aren't in the best position to showoff anyway.

That's why I think roadies are the weirdest bunch of ppl ever. The only good thing is that because of their endless pursuit for lighter bikes, the MTB community has benefitted from their research. Now our XC bikes are so light. Even my bike weighs 11kg+. But of course, my bike is a hardtail, not a full suspension like the one above. And Shimano and the like now have their own research labs looking for the lightest yet strongest parts ever.

I want a Specialized Stumpjumper. If i were to get the middle range one, it would ONLY be S$5500. Hmm. I'll consider buying it if I have the time to continue on my day-long rides.

And by that time, Isyraf would've have gotten his $5500 Santa Cruz bike, in customized Olive green with the adidas outdoor shoes to match. Lol.

Very tired already. Bye.

The Humbling of the Impossible Berm And The Crossing (Updated)

2008-05-17T23:55:00.000-07:00

Sat Night Update:

Wah leow. I did so many things today. I overcame the Impossible Berm, and I managed to finally film the wooden crossing. Isyraf, Muhd and I found a new trail at Tamp MTB park also. It includes a new fallen tree trunk obstacle which I also cleared, (but forgot to video).

After Muhd had to leave for station, Isyraf and I went to eat Tenderbest chicken rice. Nothing like half a spring chicken with lots of chicken rice to end a fruitful day. And as if that weren't enough, he tried teaching me how to overcome my fear of mounting up kerbs gracefully and with lots of finesse. He also tried to correct my trackstand. Unfortunately, these two new static skills will take time for me to learn.

And I also bought a Panaracer FIRE XC PRO 2.1" tyre to match the back one I bought yesterday. Now both tyres are red hot, and I'm $80 poorer. lol.

And on a side note, they opened Pulau Ubin's Ketam MTB park 'officially'. Haha. Its been there for 1 year+++ already, hullo?!?!

Aiyah, its going to be crowded with wannabe mountain bikers with their Scott or Trek bikes. There's one thing I notice about ppl. They may buy these Scott, Trek or Cannondale bikes, or they may talk like they know a lot about biking, but they actually don't. They're more like the east Coast park kinda ppl who show off their $3000 bikes to kiddies who may be lulled to think they're pro. And they give my bike the condescending look, just cause its from Giant. The frame my be relatively cheap, but my parts are way better than yours. And I've completed Ubin's double black diamond trail close to 10 times, 3 of which I emerged unscathed (lol.) and you haven't, so please, dun be too overconfident.

But of course, these ppl constitute a minority of ppl. Most Trek pro riders are friendly and more than happy to share their experiences and trail experience with newbies like me. Its the Scott riders who are rather full of themselves. I take my hat off to these ppl. They're nice guys.

Oh, and lastly, thanks ah Isyraf for all the guidance these few months. Without your pointers, I would still be flipping over the handlebars weekly. And without your encouragement, the Impossible Berm, The Crossing, The Logs and The Slope of Death would all just be places for me to get down and push the bike. To more fruitful and new experiences. Next stop, Bukit Timah.

I gotta stop buying stuff for my bike also. Its like an endless pursuit for perfection. I gotta save money... To buy a full suspension Trek/Specialized frame. LOL. Or should I buy a Cannondale Lefty? Its $6500. No la. I'll get a heart attack if I even drop the bike while its standing.

Sleepy ready. I talk too much. On a side note, Wrigley's chewing gum helps you stay awake. No wonder Warren Buffet recently placed his bets on the Wrigley company, cos it had "long term stability and a well established brand name" plus its nice and classic. Thanks Aud.

That's all for this week. Till the next cycling trip.

Sat Morning Update:

Went cycling with Audrey again. She really shocked me beyond belief when we finally met her 'mysterious friend' at East Coast. It was Seng Wai. What was more unbelievable was that I remembered his name, seeing as how I constantly forget people's names.

But how could I forget Seng Wai? The last time I met up with him was in sec 2. I played Magic cards against him. I lost horribly. I was still new at that time, and he was a veteran player. Furthermore, he used restricted and banned cards from an older series against my new competition abiding deck. After that day, I swore to regain my honour................

And then I grew up. Haha. Stupid Magic cards wasted my money.

Completed 70km on Sat. Read Audrey's blog for a more interesting account. She can amazingly remember every single small detail. Scholarly. Haha.

Anyways, after yesterday's trip, I slept like a bloody stone. Slept from 6p.m on Sat to 7a.m today. Haha. I only woke up to join Isyraf at Tamp MTB Park.

And today, after an exhausting trip round the Cannondale track, I managed to tackle the 'Impossible' Berm. (See video above)

I've passed that obstacle so many times but have never dared to try it cos I've always felt that I would just fall off. LOL. I'm not a physics person.

But after a demonstration and encouragement from my MTB guru, Isyraf, I went for it. Yay. Another accomplishment under my belt.

And you know what, after notching another 20km this morning at the park today I'm going for another round this afternoon with Isyraf again. My mum just called me crazy. Lol.\

But before I depart to complete new obstacles, I shall get an hour's sleep. Good day.

Oh, and I bought a red Panaracer tyre to replace my bald Michelin one. I think I'm going to replace the front one also, to balance out the colours. heh.

Back from Nippon, Off To Kallang

2008-05-06T08:31:00.000-07:00

Wah. Japan rocks.

Its a clean and beautiful city with lots of pretty cute things to see, and buy, along with lots of pretty people to watch, as they mull about their daily lives.

Unfortunately, with 2 kids in tow, plus all their kiddish necessities, plus a pram, Japan can become a bit daunting. (Lack of disability access) Not to mention its impossible to take pictures when you have your niece glued to your hand.

All in all, Japan was interesting and lovely, but somewhat uneventful. If i were to go there again, I would go with friends, cos my nieces were hard to manage, especially since they missed their dad, who was there with us, but on business.

But there was one redeeming quality about Japan. Bicycles and their parts are cheaper than what's found locally!!!

Hoho. I bought a hand-made carbon fiber handlebar, a Specialized Pinner 2.3' Kevlar tyre, a Specialized Instinct helmet and a Scott MTB lightweight saddle.

Ahh. I was in heaven when I saw this sports shopping complex that devoted an entire level to bikes. Wooot!

Yes, I'm still obsessed with my bike. The first thing i did when I came back was to check on it.... and to see whether my newly acquired upgrades could fit the bike.

Thereafter, it was labour day... I went to Tamp MTB park. Yep, just before I went to Japan, I scraped my knee damn badly, and it was a pain in the arse to heal, cos I had to walk a lot and get into all the Disneyland rides with my nieces, so the scabby healing layer kept tearing everytime I bent my knee.

But back to the park. I went there with the usual kakis. Isyraf and Muhd. Isyraf graciously gave me his elbow and knee guards he used for his motorbike lessons. I think the main reason why I've been falling so much is because I'm scared of falling even more. And guess what, the pads, plus my helmet made me feel so secure I was back to my previous self, with even more confidence and speed than ever before.

I think from now on, I'm going to wear full protective gear. I won't get hurt as badly if I do fall, and its given me my confidence that I've cumutively lost throughout my many many falls.

Then on sat morning, I went cycling with Audrey. It was shiok to be back on the flat terrain of tarmac. We had a great time, we cycled from Loyang Point to Kallang Leisure park. It was my first time there, and wow, that place was cool. It wasn't crowded, and there's a nice tenant mix to choose from after a long bike ride. We went for a pitstop at coffee bean... And I must say, after nearly a year of not going there to chill out, (since the time Siu Sing and Isyraf were crazy about the limted honeydew ice blended) coffee bean hasn't lost its laidback, pleasant corporate Starbucks-y charm.

We took a few pics (blogger's giving me problems, so no pics) and we swapped bikes. Audrey's bike was a full-suspension bike. But it was a heartland bike, so it was heavy. I think my legs got one heck of a workout just from the journey back. Haha.

Then, we HAD to make a stop at White Sands cos somebody punctured Audrey's bike tyre with his riding. (Don't look at me. Ok la, its me.) lol.

While the guy was fixing Aud's bike, we went to eat KFC. Its something every growing cyclist needs after a long bike ride. Haha. Then, out of the blue, she decided to get a bike.

Hoho. There's nothing I love more than to haggle with Mr Tay, the bike shop owner. We got a good price for it, and now Aud's the proud new owner of a GT Outpost 2008. I'm sure my old Aggressor would be happy to meet her.

After that, we went back, and I prepared for the next day. Go see Audrey's blog, she posted a pic of her new bike.

UBIN!!!

To put things simply, cos I'm getting sleepy, I conquered the stupid slope that made me flip over and nearly break a rib. Haha. I went the whole trail with my Elbow and knee guards, plus my helmet and backpack. I looked like I was going for some rescue mission. lol. Rescue mission not to fall and break a rib.

After that. I met up with Aud to collect her Outpost. Man, witnessing her expression was so heartwarming. The bond between man (or woman, in this case) and bike is simply touching. I too remember the feeling I had when I got my Aggressor. Simply indescribable, like McGriddles, which are sinfully delicious... MMMMM. But I digress.

To end this post off, I just want to tell you readers that I am going to do the impossible. I'm joining a sports event!! Haha. Never in my life would I have thought that I would be joining a sports event out of my own free will.

I'm joining the NTU bike rally 2008 with Audrey and her Outpost. The route is from East Coast to NTU and back. So it'll be around 128km excluding the return journey from home to east coast.

At first, I thought the event would be a disaster for me. The distance is not that bad la, considering that on Sunday alone, I covered 38km just from the few hours at Ubin. The terrain is not as bad as Ubin, so its alright, but I cannot stand roadies and their 5kg bikes.. Their thin tyres and carbon fiber frames are a disgrace to bikes. Yes, they go fast, but they can't even go down a road curb without breaking into a million pieces.

Haha. But thankfully, according to one road biker's blog, last year's event average speed was about 20km/h. Which is very doable, and highly sustainable.

Ah, I have more to update, but I'm too sleepy. So goodnight folks, and if any of you want to join me on the trail or on the pavements, just give me a call.

To The Land of The Shimano

2008-04-20T08:51:00.000-07:00

They upgraded the pumping track at Tamp MTB park recently, plus they really repaved and added lots of nice rocky trails for the BikeAsia race last week.

Plus, after the recent close shave at the ribs, I've never been more of a wuss. I was stuck at the pumping track's first main hump, too scareded to go up, lol. After 4 about-turn attempts, I just went for it, and managed to complete the circuit. I went another 3 rounds, faster and faster. But I guess, one must know their limit.

I sped up towards the first hump, leaned forward, in anticipation of the feedback from the climb towards the apex and... I caught AIR! Woohoo.

My front tyre was off the ground. Unfortunately, this never happened before, and before a smile could form on my face, I was about to land, and WHUMP, I fell like a smelly jackfruit.

I wasn't badly hurt, just a scratched knee, but what was ravaged was my already shaky confidence.

Either two things happened. Either I didn't straighten the bar upon impact, hence the front wheel skidded OR I put too much body weight to the front. But if you ask me, I think its both. LOL.

Anyway, I later met up with Isyraf and we went to the BikeAsia trail. 1 lap was 10km, but the trail was so disjointed, we ended up going about it the wrong direction.

But back to the trail. It was spectacular. The climbs are not killers, so you can cycle up without using back-breaking effort, enought to snap my chain. And the descents are long and gradual, allowing you to pick up speed if you're good (Isyraf) or meander around at a comfortable speed (me). Haha.

But they did add lots of rocks and ruts, making it more challenging than it looked initially. I'm definitely going there a few more times to shore up my confidence before heading back to Ubin.

Anyway, ppl, I'll be going to Japan again. My sister needed help in looking after the children while she's there on vacation, and since my brother-in-law is on a business trip while we're there, she needed me to help. Hoho. Free paid vacation. Though my leave for ORD is consumed. but who cares? Japan!!!

Maybe Shimano parts are cheaper there. Can I get an XTR derailleur for like $30? Oooo. I'll buy on the spot.

Hoho. leaving this Tue, coming back the following Mon. See u ppl!!!

A New Dawn

2008-04-16T07:59:00.000-07:00

'Hope won't counter pure inability.' That was what I said at the end of the previous post.

Haha. How right I was.

We went to Ubin 2 weekends back, I forgot to bring my helmet, but we attempted the trail anyway.

And I must say, so far, things were going fine. I even beat Mamat to the halfway point. Haha. New bike, more willpower to endure the climbs. We finished the trail, everyone relatively unscathed, save for Muhd who I think slipped cos his brakes weren't working cos there was a branch stuck in between the brakes and the rim. Bro, you got to check why, can't let it happen twice in a row. LOL.

After a toilet break, ala 'field camp' I was the one who wanted to go another round.

We started off from China Bowl, this 40m long STEEP slope that's just super kickass. My Juicys were spectacular. Finally after moving along, we reached a technical part of the trail, where there's a 5m long extremely freacking steep slope down, and right after, its a left turn almost perpendicular. If you miss the turn, there's a nice set of rocks that seem shaped like ramps to propel you to your untimely demise.

This is the point where Isyraf (who's always the first rider) gets off and climbs up to the point before the slope to make sure we (or me) doesn't plummet to my death, cos I like to speed, though I don't think I have the skills to speed.

Normally Muhd and I would stop and just push the bikes down. But this time we decided to try it. Muhd cleared the slope, albeit with feet at the sides of his bike for balance.

I decided to do it the proper way, and proceeded to lower down my seat. I moved a little further behind, mounted my bike, stood up, shifted my weight back, and hoped that I could clear it.

I pedalled slowly to the edge of the slope, braked a little, and went down. Man, was the slope scary shit! I was too fast, I jammed my back brakes. My back wheel dragged, but I was still moving fast. 'Quick, feather the front brakes!' I thought to myself.

Hoho. All I could remember was that I jammed the front too much, the front wheel dug into the ground and I was thrown over the handlebars and then a rock was coming to my face and..... PAIN. Like a thousand lumbar punctures into the spine, the pain was coming from my ribs.

I tell you, I was screaming like a crazy suicide bomber, and rolling on my back like I was on fire.

All I heard was something like, "Quick Muhd! Zul fell." from Isyraf. And I was still yelling, cos my ribs felt like they were broken.

"Take his bag off," Isyraf said. But I was too busy rolling, clutching my ribs for them to do anything.

"Oh, it looks bad," said Muhd, as he lifted my shirt to assess the damage. Coming from a CD paramedic, it wasn't very comforting.

Thankfully the pain subsided after a few minutes, I got up, and we quickly proceeded down to the end point.

Wah, I tell you, the next day, when I woke up, my left ribs were totally black, and swollen like want to die. But it wasn't broken la. Cos the pain wasn't that severe. The MO in camp gave me 2 different pain killers and 2 muscle relaxants.

You know what I learnt ladies and gents? NEVER JAM THE FRONT BRAKES! Ever. Feather it. But I guess I was to panicky that time I just jammed my Juicys. And being hydraulic disc brakes, one finger is enough to fully jam the brakes. Isyraf saw me use my whole god damn hand to squeeze the front brakes. I swear, sometimes the strongest brakes aren't the best.

Anyway, last weekend, I dint go Ubin. Wasn't free. Could've have made time for it, but the bruise from the previous week and the cuts from 2 weeks before weren't properly healed yet. I took a pass.

But I did go cycling at East Coast with that arrogant marathon runner from my office. I thought he would leave me behind, but the self-declared stunt biker was like shit. He dint even know how to change gears on the bike, and would panic when small children overtook him. I could cycle ahead, sit down and wait for him.

The next day he went to the office and told everyone that he has never seen a fat guy on a bike ride that fast before. Hoho. Please, you're making me blush.

But seriously, this shitass of a person insinuated I was stupid for buying an expensive bike, saying that his $300 Haro bike can do better. he can do all sorts of stunts, and at the beginning of the outing he said he'll try not to,leave me behind. LOL.

I doubt he has a bike, cos he can't cycle, nor change gears on FLAT East Coast Road. LOL. And he couldn't keep up with me, when I was actually cycling and stopping to wait for him. If he were to follow the speed Isyraf, Muhd and I actually go, we'll be able to cycle from end to end of East Coast, go to Macs to eat and make another round before he can even finish one round at the beach. Hoho.

Of course I thought that cycling with this moron would shore up my confidence in biking, and it did. I was fast again, cos after the fall I was very very scared.

That was until Isyraf brought me to the freeride park at Pasir Ris. We attempted another steep slope. Isyraf went down like nothing, I had cold feet. I think I turned and stopped at the top of the slope 3 times, pondering whether I should go down. In the end I did, and I emerged unscathed.

I guess that's the problem with me. I rarely encounter failure because I do the things I know I can do. I'm not a huge risk taker and that is a fault I need to correct. And if I do fail, I get scared and discouraged.

Not going to Ubin again this weekend. Going to the freeride park and Tamp MTB park to practise. Isyraf said my head was close to hitting the rock that day in Ubin, thank god it was the ribs and not the head.

Lesson learnt. Its a new dawn, its a new day. Feather brakes, wear helmet... LOL.

The Aftermath

2008-04-05T04:33:00.000-07:00

Wah leow. I still cannot get over the smoothness and the agility my Iguana has. And I thought the brakes sucked initially, because it had 50% efficiency until its bedded in.

You know what else I can't get over? Bveing totally broke. LOL.

I think its almost fully bedded in and just 20 minutes ago, I nearly got thrown off the bike cos I jammed the brakes.

Haha. Truly, Juicy brakes are the best! And I can keep saying 'juicy' when I'm safely speeding down a hill with the knowledge that my brakes have enough power to stop my colossal speeding mass.

Maybe that's what I bought it for. Anyways, just 4 days after its purchase, I upgraded the bike, haha. Sort of la. I bought Specialized handlebar grips. Ok la, I know my bike is not from Specialized, but its nice enough to pretend...

Could've have bought the Scott grips but that'll just scream 'wannabe'.

Oh, I bought a Lizardskin chainstay so the chain won't scratch the frame on bumps. Giant hardtail frames are prone to chain-rub, according to forums. I think its sort of good, cos it lowers the bike's CG, making it stable.

I feel so damn bloody satisfied right now. Tmw, I'm going to ubin again. Really hope I don't fall and damage my bike. But so far, I find my confidence improving. Yay!!!

We'll see how la tmw.

Hope won't counter pure inability. LOL.

The IGUANA Arriveth

2008-04-03T09:03:00.000-07:00

Holy shit. What did I just do? Why did I pay $1500+ to get a bicycle?

Cos I got a damn good one. Holy shitty shit shit!

The ride back home from the shop was a dream. The bike coasts so smoothly, the Juicy hydraulic brakes require a tap from my middle finger only to stop.

And if a stupid pedestrian blocks my way, said finger will go pointing in his direction.

My god. The hand assembled Mavic Crossrides are just plain HEAVEN. My bike has no drag at all, save for the needed contact between ground and tyres needed for braking and movement.

The LX drivetrain changes gear so quietly, I thought it was spoilt. LOL.

What was once a dream to own Mavics, Juicys and a Deore LX drivetrain, on a pristine white frame, was accomplished in 3 months.

MONEY truly does make the world go round. And now I have none left. Haha. 9 months of tuiton, gone down the drain on driving and my 2 bikes.

Anyways, I've learnt a valuable lessons from NS, cycling, and investing.

NS has opened my eyes. I'm old. Some ppl are already WAY behind in the rat race. ITE, pri sch dropouts etc. And some ppl are scholars awaiting Harvard. And some like me, will be NTU business school undergrads in slightly over a year.

And some struggle to even be in the position I am in.

As much as it does comfort me to know that I am doing considerably alright in the Rat Race of Life, I realise that others are so far ahead, I'm the one who can barely catch up.

So I have to work hard, to achieve what I know I can, BUT at the same time, I must be thankful to God for what I have.

Cycling has thought me that something may seem scary, a slope down may seem insane, a slope up may seem impossible, but you never know how far you can go without trying. Dare to FAIL.
And success will come. Till you smash your face against a wall and split your lips open. LOL.

Investments have thought me that following the crowd will lead to meagre returns. Be your own man. Be a contrarian investor, and money will flow like free.

And lastly, as materialistic as I sound, you can never find full happiness when poor. But neither will wealth guarantee complete happiness and fulfillment.

So I realise now, that I need to be more prudent with my resources and my finances. I need to be thankful for what I have, yet strive for that next big thing. (Audi R8 by age of 35, hoho.) And I need to dare to fail, to taste success.

And for that, wish me luck when I take the Iguana out to the double black diamond singletrack at Ubin. Hope I don't fall in the singletrack called Life.

Rise of The IGUANA, Fall of The AGGRESSOR

2008-04-02T07:53:00.000-07:00

I write this entry with a heavy heart. After serving me so loyally for 3 months, the Aggressor is......... DEAD!

I was cycling at Seashell Park, a gradual hilly area. As I pedalled up the slope, a loud "CLACK" was heard throughout the Pasir ris neighbourhood, breaking the silence of the night.

Little did I know that that was the dying scream of my Aggressor.

I dismounted, reluctant to see what had happened. It had been making funny noises before I went to Ubin on Sunday. After the trip, the noise became worse, gear shifting to the highest 2 gears imposssible. Yet, I still went cycling, the day after that.

I inspected the damage. The rear derailleur was bent. I attempted a hasty repair, checked and mounted the bike again. As I was on a slope, I stood on the pedals.

"CLACK!! PAP!!" I almost lost my balance as my Aggressor screamed its last painful cry, pleading for death.

I got off, and the derailleur looked like this:

It was impossible for me to fix it. And then I knew... Its dead.

I went to Isyraf's house nearby, lugging the dead chassis. We discussed funeral plans, and the new girl I'm going to get.

I took a cab home, with the chassis in the trunk. I knew... A lot of thinking would've have to be done that night.

And here I am, welcoming the new addition to my otherwise uninteresting life, the IGUANA Disc 2008.

What the shit? Isn't it the same as your Aggressor, you may ask? Not exactly. The frame is much lighter and stronger. The parts suck like shit, although its 3 levels higher than the Aggressor in terms of components.

Haha. But my Aggressor will not be forgotten. Instead, the Iguana will be a commemoration to her. A salute to the lessons learnt, the falls she made me make, to become the rider I am today.

Still sucky components? Hoho. I upgraded almost the whole bike.

I swapped out the stock parts for these:

Full Deore LX drivetrain, $400 (4 levels higher than current)

Mavic Crossride Wheelset, $400 (Incomparable to the Jalco rims and brandless hubs now)

Avid Juicy 5 Hydraulic disc brakes, $450 (Its Avid, Juicy 5! Its an insult to compare it with my Tektro rim brakes)

Total Price after an hour plus of haggling: $1,550 including the frame.

If I had bought the Trance ($2,000), I wouldn't have been able to afford the high end wheelset (brandless on Trance), brakes (Tektro hydrualics, won't have enough stopping power for my mass plus weight of full suspension) and drivetrain (Normal Deore derailleurs, generic Shimano Cassettes and cranks). I would've have been back to a broken derailleur in 6 mths, maybe slightly more? A broken derailleur on a $2,000 bike. Lol.

Finally, my dream bike is here, albeit the lack of full suspension. Though 'Iguana' is not as 'fierce' as 'Aggressor'. Haha.

Collecting it tmw. Oooo. Can't wait to try the Juicy brakes. Mwahaha. Enough stopping power to stop my immense mass and ass downhill the China Bowl at Ubin. Woohoo!!!!!!!

The stupid thing now, is that I'm kinda scared to go Ubin on my new, expensive Princess.

Well, at least it didn't come with clipless pedals. If not, I'll fall like some enthu ppl I know. LOL! No offence, brother, but clipless on trails is suicide.

Can't wait for this weekend. Gonna bed-in my hydraulics Juicys before I head down to Ubin. Yay.

Some pics of my Aggressor before her untimely demise:

And guess what? You know how much it'll cost to repair my Aggressor's derailleur? $25. Lol. I think I may trade it in, or let someone deserving ride her.

Are you deserving of riding my first bike? I think you are.

Trance... The new 2008 craze

2008-03-23T05:51:00.000-07:00

Son of crapper. This is my DREAM bike. Its light, fast, and heck of a lot more comfortable than my GT Aggressor. But of course comparing this with my Aggressor is like comparing Brad Pitt with me. I'm so hot, and well, he's Mrs Jolie.

Now the problem with buying this bike are many. Firstly, its the moolah issue. Its $2000 without bargaining. Secondly, its me and my brilliant riding skills.

Now lets take a look at issue no. 1.

I have no problems coughing up the money by End July at most, while still comfortably maintaining my dangerous paycheck-to-paycheck style of living. The problem is, do I want to put my future financial earnings for a freaking dreamy bike?

If I put in $2000 now into my portfolio, and if markets rise 40% by mid 2009, I would be making $800 profit in slightly more than a year. And if markets rise an annualised average of 10% a year (averaging bulls and bears), my money would turn to $3221.02 by the time I turn 25. By that time, I'll be ready to buy my Zara shirts for my new executive position at Xyz MNC.

And its all doable, considering the markets are so shitty and dirt-cheap now.

Now, let's say I do buy my bike. By 2013, that bike would be still in relatively good condition, with many priceless memories, however, I would be $3221.02 poorer, not just $2000 poorer than if I had not bought the freaking sexy Trance bike.

That's the money part. Now, we come to issue no. 2. My brilliant riding skills.

I am a brilliant mountain biker. My days at Ubin can never be complete without me breaking a sweat, flexing my toned legs, or almost bleeding to death or breaking an arm.

Yes, I suck. There was a week in Ubin last month, where I crashed 4 times. And who can forget the stitches I got when I crashed into the Damai Sec wall, face-first? I'm sure my Aggressor won't forgive me for the damaged fork barely one-month into its existence that time.

But recently, I've been improving dramatically. I fell only once last week, with a deep cut on my arm, because I stupidly attempted something I KNEW I wouldn't be able to do. The rock garden was so uneven, and I wasn't confident enough, so I went slow, got my front wheel stuck in a rut, and instead of falling, I braced my arm against a sharp boulder, and got a cut that would give my torn lip a run for its money.

What was I talking about again? Oh yes. Me improving. But anyways, after that, I didn't fall in the singletrack. Oh, and there were many parts I could have fallen to my untimely demise.

All in all, I feel more confident now, and the ride yesterday at Tamp MB Park made me more so.
The only thing is, confident and improving or not, another big fall will come. Its all part and parcel of learning how to cycle. The problem is, do I want to fall on my $2000 bike or my already slightly damaged $400 one?

Another small issue would be my lack of technical bike maintenance know how. As you can see from the pic, the bike's full suspension is rather a bitch to clean, not to mention the hydraulic disc brakes would be a ITE worthy year-end project to manage and maintain.

But the question still stands. To buy or not to buy? To wager future monetary earnings for current and future happiness? To buy a bike meant for skill levels much higher than what I have now?

I say, if I can bravely see portfolio losses of 45% and still put in more money hoping for the best in the long-term, I guess I can reward myself with a little something to celebrate more of my future successes.

Haha. I'm so gonna buy my Trance.

You've served me well, my dear. And you'll continue to serve till the new girl comes. And ride her, I will. Heh.

The OTHER Side

2008-03-19T01:51:00.000-07:00

Above is a video showing the other side of mountain biking, the side I'm VERY familliar with, though my falls are much less spectacular.

You can see that most falls are due to rider error, but there are a few where the rims, fail, causing you to just die.

Scary shit. My life and safety is in the hands of cheap aluminium rims and small rubber $3 brake pads, no more than 4 cm long.

That's just way too scary.

Anyways, why do I have so much time you ask? Well, I was and am on 2 days MC.

Keng? No la. Where got? I got injured in a spot most males care not to talk about. Haha. Ok la, its just near 'that' area. And there's a funny story on how it happened. Let's just say I won't be wearing those again to Ubin.

But I've really treasured this 2 days of hols. Seeing as how I've not taken MC for a whole year (not withstanding the 2 days I took when I busted my lips open), and I'm actually well enough not to spend th whole day drugged up and sleeping. I've enjoyed myself and have managed to catch up on some finance news.

Yes, its money time again. As at today's stock prices, my inital investment portfolio, which I started up in August 07 has since made a 49% loss. I've named it plan A.

Fucking hell!?! Yes.

As at today, the few hundred dollars I've just pumped in this month (aka Plan B) has made a 10% loss. Not bad eh?

Losses, losses losses. But I'm thinking long term.

If prices return to pre-Aug 07 prices, Plan A would make a 1.02% gain, and Plan B would make a 78.9% gain (total gain would be around 13.5% cos the weightage of A is much higher). It seems that I made bad choices in Plan A. During that period, I just started out, what. But this recession rocks. Prices have not dropped so much in decades and its set to drop further. I'm just snapping up the bargains baby, and I hope to acheive total portfolio gains (combined plans A and B) of 20% gain by mid 2009. Which is doable, unless more US banks go belly up, and the Fed refuses to bail them out, then I'm dead. Oh, and Hong Kong doesn't get SARS again, then I'm set.

I can smell the money.

Ah, we are getting old. Girls our age are getting primed up for jobs, guys our age are in NS, either being a mighty SISPEC warrior or a CD clerk planning his financial future.

Soon, in 10 years time, when we meet again, some of us will be driving big cars, some small cars, some still riding the bus. Some of us will be managers, executives, academics, some just paper pushers in MNCs or worse, the Garmen. Some married, some with children, some still alone.

What we achieve in life depends on what we do here and now.

And here I am cycling like a child who's never had a childhood, however true it may be.

Kick-ass Vids

2008-03-18T10:00:00.000-07:00

These people are crazy man. They look like they're flying on their bikes. Its amazing that they just don't skid and die.

Wah. And here I am, unable to complete the Ubin double black diamond courses fully.

These people have my respect. Bloody awe-inspiring.

Snow City

2008-03-13T08:43:00.000-07:00

The newest addition to my bike.

F***ING SNOW TYRES!

Einstein was called insane when he dreamt up of his what not theories, and I've been chided by my colleagues when I brought this back from lunch today from the Eunos Technolink.

But I daresay, this idea is pure genius. Snow tires on the slippery, 1.5m wide singletracks of Ubin, now that's genius.

Till now. I went to check it out, each of these tires weigh at least 300g heavier than my current tyres, also by Kenda. Plus, in retrospect, after riding my bike around the carpark tonight, (which I've since washed and lubed on Tue) cornering on concrete with metal studs may well be my last turn.

Lol. I guess it wasn't very smart eh? NOT. These branded Kenda Klondike tyres, retailing at USD $54.99 cost me SGD $9.50. Hah. More grip at Ubin for close to the price of a return bumboat journey with my Aggressor.

Thank god for the clearance sale. Now to put these new babies on and pray that it grips the road.

Oh, and (*Y&(*^*&%^&$%^#^%#^%$&^*&^*&^*&^*&&&!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've been buying and topping up my unit trusts, bit by bit ( once bitten, twice shy ) everytime the market drops. Then, today, the bloody Hong Kong markets dropped by 4.8% and I didn't top up. Argh. Wasted buying oppurtunity. My recent few hundred dollars that I topped up has been breaking even, if I had bought at a low price today, my ailing portflio would've been much better.

I bet this is Karma for the other time I grumbled to my mum that it was her fault that she forwarded my loan to me late and caused me to miss the CNY slump. Now I missed a correction, all by myself. SHit. Could've have made a few hundred in a week. F.CUK. Argh.

Singapore Fei-Fei Live at Ubin

2008-03-09T08:23:00.000-07:00

Went to Ubin today with Ismam, who is my CD colleague and Dept IC, Muhd, and Lin Hao the gay ACJC guy who I once threw accross my table (see late 2007 entries).

Lin Hao went home haflway cos he wasn't used to cycling. Anyway, here's a short video of me and Muhammad doing a very short round around a pumping (see entry below for defintion) track.

We're supposed to shift our body weight while standing, but we're not pro enough. Enjoy the sight of me bouncing around more than I usually do.

Oh, and sorry Ismam, cos I edited your commentary away cos my prep time while you were talking was too long.

Oh, anyway, here's the actual way of doing it:

But you know how pro I am? You know in the second part of the instructional video, the guy was damn fast in the forest? I was fast and confident too.

Then... I hit a tree.

Next week I'll try the same dirt track, slower and mindful of the tress. Lol.

Two Wheels and Knee-deep in Emo

2008-03-03T06:55:00.000-08:00

I couldn't go to Ubin last Sunday due to the heavy rain throughout the whole day. But as the rain died down at around 4p.m., I was so itchy to get onto my bike I really couldn't stand it anymore. I went to the Tampines Mountain Bike Park.

I expected a crummy attempt by NParks to just build a park for the sake of building it, to achieve their goal of becoming a cycling city by 2015.

But I was wrong. I tell you the view was so breathtaking. I was indescribably happy to learn that there was a park with a good solid trail, and steep, easy downhill trails down, with a site for pumping ( small consecutive humps to be tackled at high speed, with balance to be maintained by shifting your body weight intermittently between the back and front tyres, retaining traction.)

Wow. Because it was raining throughout the day, I wasn't able to explore the park fully, but I'm definitely coming back this saturday to explore the area, pending the state of the whether.

Now, let the pics do the talking.

Even though small, the lush green rolling hills hide the lack of size, while also hiding the kick ass mud hill ahead.

Never thought being at a crossroad would've been such a beautiful thing.

I thought I was alone, but there goes another lonely soul exploring the park, breathing in the fresh crisp air, and enjoying the solitude that we sometimes need but can't get. Thank god for the bike.

The top of the hill overlooks the entire park.

Not choosing the proper line can get you in deep crap. Lol.

The mud's so thick my bike can stand on its own. I hate the rainy season. For once in my life. Haha.

Can you imagine I went to White Sands to eat covered in mud?

The greates hill and trail on earth. The KFC crispy chicken skin trail.

Now I know why those small kids put those tacky "I Luv My Bike" bells on their bikes. Cos they really do.

The money shot.

A great day, on a great bike.

You know what, if I ever get a girlfriend, she must be able to cycle or at least interested in learning, and must not be content with just cycling at East Coast. Haha. I guess I can put this on the backburner along with winning the Nobel Prize for solving world hunger. Haha.

Now, enough emo shit. Let's talk hard cash. Dow dropped 2.51% on 29/02/08, effects could be seen by Hang Seng and STI dropping approximately 3.55% the following monday. Hoho. I smell fresh bargains. Let's hope the industrial report released tonight sucks along with the Federal Govt employment reports this friday. I smell dollar cost averaging around the corner.

Oh, and thanks so much to all those who wished me well today. I love you guys. So touching, hor.

Oh, and the food at the office today was too much. Lol. OK,la, it was just nice for me, too much for all of you. Haha.

And to my mum, to whom I gave the ultimatum, "I want a bike or cash only," quietly submitted cahs, to prevent any arguments on the bike issue. Haha. You just funded my bike upgrades. Thanks loads.

Crossrods? Bah. First-quarter-life crisis.

2008-02-28T07:21:00.000-08:00

Son of a bitch. When I gripe to my mother about missing the boat after not topping up after the CNY market opening, she says that I shouldn't worry, and that there'll be another opportunity.

Well, I tell her that markets are cyclical, and if you don't prepare by injecting capital in a bear market, you will never be able to fully gain from the upcoming bull market coming soon.

PLUS, markets have gained 10%, for which I have no stake in, which I missed because of her tardiness.

So she says, "If you know so much, your initial investments won't be at a loss."

Touche, mother.

Sorry, you joined the non-believers. Anyway, I have learnt much since my August foray into the markets. I have since picked up technical analysis, now I sort of know what to look out for and stuff like that. So I KNEW that there was nothing but a high probability of gain after the CNY markets opened. DAMN IT!

Shit man. No point crying over spilt milk, I know.

I guess I'm having a first-quarter life crisis.

Why? Cos I'm going to reach the big 2-0 soon. And what do I have to show for it?

I'm still oppressed. Can't go out till late at night, can't ride a bike outside East Coast park (or so she thinks).

But I don't give a shit to all this anymore. Hah. I just come back late nowadays, cycle till past midnight on the roads, I don't care.

I earn a relatively high income for my age, and I'm well on my way to becoming an Audi-driving adult, I hope, in at least 15 years time. And this excludes future dividends and long term capital gains form my so-called 'failed investments'.

But don't get me wrong la, I won't be an ungrateful son. I will contribute and repay the enormous debt I owe my parents. I'm just saying that they cannot control all aspects of my life anymore.

And you know what, rebellion is quite fun. Heh. Now I know why people actually form political parties against our garmen. They know they will never win anything, but I suppose its all in the name of fun.

Woohoo. Upgrading my bike soon.

Motorbike license in 2 years time? Nah. Rebellion doesn't need to end up in my untimely demise.

F%%%! HSI rebounded so strongly these past few days.

NVM. US GDP is below analysts' projections. Momentum will be low in the first quarter of next FY. Good for bargain hunting.

Ben Bernanke says he's going to cut the Fed rates to prop up the economy. Hoho. I sense a rally next week after tmw's inevitable fall in the SnP and DOW.

Its going to be another volatile week for the HSI. Let's hope I can buy correctly.

Corporate Governance at its Best

2008-02-27T03:21:00.000-08:00

Hoho. I'm so happy that I broke my Oakleys. ( Refer to the entry 'Lip Service')

My specs were the most snug and comfy specs I've ever owned, and despite some heathens saying its not 'me', I loved them. May they rest in peace, cos the service centre said I smashed it beyond repair.

Haha. Beyond repair. So they gave me a NEW PAIR!

Yay! But those specs were not only aesthetically pleasing, but it saved my face when I smashed myself against the wall.

No doubt after crashing into the wall, I split my lip into two, like what Jack the Ripper did to Geylang escorts; the glasses left a deep 2 cm cut next to my eye, but it was all fine and dandy.

I remember the WHUMP sound of my face hitting the wall, and my face sliding off my specs, hence the cut.

So I guess if i had been wearing cheapskate brittle specs, I would have cracked my cheek bone. Cool.

So what has Oakley got to gain by giving fatboy a free frame? It just ensured that my next frames will be Oakley also. I'm thinking of either buying sunglasses or converting my current ones to sunglasses and getting new ones.

After much thought, I will never switch to contacts. They're more expensive in the long run, more risky ( due to infections), but the main gripe I have about them is that you need to wake up earlier to put them on and sleep later after you clean them.

So specs are they way to go.

Ok, enough boring ME talk.

Let's talk about something everyone can relate to: MONEY.

You know what? I told my mum to forward me money so I can invest. its just a temp loan, after I pay off my driving, I can pay her loan back with my tuition money.

So she agreed, and I told her to give the money the week bofore CNY.

She was late. Damn. When markets opened after CNY, it was so low, now the markets gained 8% even during this bearish times.

I knew it would be low, aiyoh, I could have made around $75 per $1000 invested after sales charge. Wah leow. Now the loaned money is sitting in a cash storage fund. It generated $1.25 interest during this time. WAH! My mother shortchanged me of $150+ these 3 weeks. Wah leow. All because she was too lazy to go to the bank. I could have bought my hubs.

Ok, enough about money. Bike time.

I know that my bike is really in a bad shape, because its my first serious bike, so its taken all the hits and falls and face-smashing-on-wall action, all part and parcel of being a better cyclist.

So I decided if I want to upgrade my bike, I'm going to buy a new bike. I'll stick to a hardtail bike, cos I don't think I'm brave enough for downhill riding and jumping. But I'm willing to spend around $1k. That'll get me a full Deore LX gearset, good XC suspension, shiny disk brakes (OOOOO!) and a GT Avalanche 1.0 frame. Good buy.

But I'm not going to buy it now of course, I'm not Bill Gates. I'll buy it after the first year of uni, to see whether I even have the time to cycle, cos NS allows me to live life without working hard to pass any exam or other responsibilities that will crop up in uni.

So why am I talking about end 2009 now? Cos what I notice is that high end hubs aren't provided in the $1k++ bikes. So I can upgrade my hubs now, then I can transfer them to my new bike later down the road.

Yay! Cos there's a BikeAsia Expo in april. Its a Regional trade show for bikes and motorcycles. I can buy my hubs cheap (I hope) then.

So finally, my bike will have something non-stock on it besides the metal pedals I bought recently. Yay! I'm like a japanese schoolgirl when it comes to my 'Yay!'.

But now all I need is to dig out $250+ to afford my hubs and wheel set. Damn. If only I had the $150 that I knew I could make after the CNY market opening. If only she wasn't too late to go to the bank or write me a check. Argh!!!

Life Sucks. But at least it doesn't suck as much as yours. Cos if you read this whole entry start to finish, you must really have no life. HAHAHAHAHA!

No la, I treasure readers. I too read other people's long long entries. It sometimes makes me thankful I'm not them, while other times I feel like I really am quite pathetic when it comes to accruing accomplishments.

Bah, there's always time to become successful in life. I have dibs on a silver Audi R8 ok?

Oh when, oh when will i break even?

2008-02-22T04:35:00.000-08:00

Wah leow. SOB!

Every weekday, I pray, I wait, I endure and slog through the week so that the weekend can come.

Why?

So i can sit my ass on my GT and go cycling. Yes, folks, I can't wait to exercise. But no, I'm not clearing my choked arteries just yet, cos almost everywhere I go on that damn bike, I eat lotsa lotsa good food. Yummy!

But anyways, i'm damn pissed that I'm sick now. Its a friday night, I should be happily greasing my chain now, anticipating the pre-planned bike ride to tamp mountain bike park tmw, and Ubin on sunday again, with Isyraf and my CD colleagues.

Shit, man. I guess no chicken rice and nasi lemak on the shores of Ubin on sunday for me. Damn it! I'm so bored.

Anyways, I'm eagerly watching the markets now, waiting for the damn market to bottom out before I start buying. Haha. But I think all the losses I've made so far have not dampened my risk appetite, but has more so, increased it. I can't wait to inject more fresh capital, wait for the next bull run, and ride it through. Hopefully the bull run happens before i ORD, to show those non-believers that I'm not a douche who just blew 28% of my portfolio in 3 months.

And, lastly, a note to Tat Chung, and a few other readers, my entries on money are entirely entries on money. No hidden meaning, no code, no innuendo. Haha. In 2006, I guess this could have been a form of coded entries, but not now. I'm really talking about money, not other non-fiduciary happenings like last time. Heh.

The sad thing is, the money lost is real. Haha.

Lip Service

2008-02-17T06:20:00.000-08:00

Sorry for the lack of updates. Been kinda busy lately.

Finance news:

I've come to terms with my portfolio disaster. Pumed in 1k fresh capital to lower down average costs and take advantage of current economic downturn.

The biggest automobile scam (CDC) has currently swallowed 2k+ of my cash. Hope they actually will give me a license at the end of their con.

I've sunked further in debt as the fiscal responsiblities of driving and the need for fresh capital for DCA in my unit trusts over this short period has made me a borrower from the Ma-Pa bank. Thank god its no interest.

Can't afford to lose my tuition clients.

Will be debt free and hopefully have a return of -28% on my portfolio by Jun and a return of 25% by next Feb.

"Why do you invest if its so risky?", my colleaguge asked, citing the fact that he didn't make any money, but he didn't lose a single cent either. My answer is, yes I did come in at the wrong time, but in the long term of 3-5 yrs, that cash will make more money than your fixed deposit can make in 20 years. And my injection of fresh capital in this current recession which ended a bull cycle all so suddenly will yield far better returns of about 20-45% in 2 yrs or less. So laugh, make fun now, but when I'm driving my Audi R8 past your house in 25 yrs time, I''ll make sure I'll horn real loud, ok?

Oh, and READER BEWARE!

Cycling is fucking dangerous if you're a fat sod who goes speeding at 12 a.m. on a weekday night without replacing the flat batteries in your headlight.

As the TP says: SPEEDING KILLS, DON'T PAY THE PRICE

What was my price for my moment of folly:

6 stitches on my upper lip, my $600 specs split into two and damage to the front suspension on my GT.

Thank god I didn't break any teeth and that my medical is covered under SCDF.

Lol. Cooked up an excuse that I fell while running at night around my estate to my mother, so she wouldn't ask any questions. She still doesn't know about the bike. LOL.

But seriously, the 2 weeks after the incident, I was damn scared of cycling. Cycled like a scared girl on training wheels.

But as Isyraf says, "Every fall makes you a better rider."

This wasn't a fall its a collision, but anyways that's not the point. haha. The point is today I went to Ubin again with Muhd. Fucking fun. Speeding down the gravel trails, climbing up never ending hills then speeding down a rocky path, with no helmet, has restored my confidence in my skills.

Long live my Aggressor and most of all my lips, which have since completely healed after 5 weeks without any visble scarring.

Yay!

Going Ubin next Sat / Sun. Anyone wants to follow? You must be a beginner so you don't leave me behind, haha. But not so green until you can't do a downhill gravel.

Sorry la for the fragmented update, but I'm pressed for time. See you guys next time.

Its Too Late To Apologize.. Its Too Late...

2008-01-22T07:37:00.000-08:00

If there's one thing I've learnt in SCDF, is that Microsoft Excel is a wonderful tool.

Tadaaa!

Just pop a figure in and all the info that you need (but not want) comes on sceen. Hohoho.

What's that? That my dear, is one of my Unit trust investments. And I can recall barely 3 months back, breaking even, and celebrating 0.7% profit. Haha. Good times.

Weighted average cost is the average costs of all my units, and NAV is how much they're currently worth.

How much I gain or lose is the NAV difference multiplied by the no. of units I own. Simple maths, to trick simpletons like me to put their hard earned money into the world's oldest IR, the world's equity markets.

Haha. Long term thinking must be employed eh?

Not exactly. According to the data, my investments should yield some profit for my future grandchildren to buy a few cups of bubble tea.

After a 2061.23 point drop in just 1 day, prior to a 1500+ point drop last week, its official! Its a recession my dears!

Let the graph do the talking.

I bought on average when the markets were recovering form the major August 2007 correction when markets just discovered the CDO credit crunch. ( 1st Red Circle )

Well, now (2nd Red Circle) they say this problem is here to stay and will most likely cause a recession. Like motherFing DUH!

I lost 35.616% in 3 months! Woohoo. Happy 2008 folks.

Gorgeousness during the PAE

2008-01-07T04:00:00.000-08:00

In light of the previous post showing Perkafe becoming an integral part of MJC, despite many who were unsure of its long-term feasibility in its infancy, I went snooping around MJC's website. Wah. Quite professional hor. And lo and behold, my face is on the front page for the PAE admission. Haha. I should get royalties for my gorgeous face being used for admission.

Further snooping led me to the milestones page, where in 2005 and 2006, there were a list of several entrepeneurial achievements, whereas in 2007, there were none.

Which makes me quite proud that Siu Sing and I managed to both set up a viable business and do competitions at the same time. But I suppose that the juniors did concentrate on the family business, Perkafe.

But Biz Club should not solely be about Perkafe, it should be about business, like what the name suggests.

But I suppose that's because Sing and I are no more at the helm. He's busy driving his tank protecting the nation, and I'm doing a more inportant role(yeah, right) of ensuring stupid CD people's payrolls occur in time.

As Russell Crowe said to the emperor in Gladiator, "The time for honouring yourself will come to an end."

An so it has.

Perk You, Perk Me.

2008-01-06T07:29:00.000-08:00

Nice picture of Azlyn's classmates. No no. I'm not a stalker. Look at it properly.

Its PERKAFE!

They went back recently and Perkafe just got a new pool table for 2008. To think that when the idea was suggested by Siu Sing and I 2 years back, it was shot down. Certain people in power did not want pool tables and gaming areas. Well, look at it now.

Haha. Brings back old memories. To think that Siu Sing, Bjorn, and I will forever be known as the founders of a small little cosy place we call Perkafe.

Has it been a year already?

2008-01-01T01:40:00.000-08:00

HoHo.

A year has come and gone. Many new things encountered, many new experiences to make us into better men and women of tomorrow.

My year was boring and uneventful. I learnt few things in CD, could've have sent me for a 2 week CD crash course and I probably would've learnt more.

Made losses in my Unit Trusts. Forced to hold for the long term.

Spent all my money that I've earned in 2007 from tuition and NS. Had an epiphany. I can't afford to have credit cards, for if i do, I'll be saddled with debt till the day I go poof.

So I decided that 2008 should be different. I should have achieveable resolutions, that will have a greater impact on my life.

I intend to:

Cut my spending by 50%
Increase monthly savings by at least 50%
Perform a trackstand properly

Simple right?

The first and the second goals may seem the same, but its actually not. I spend a lot, mostly on food, entertainment, and big ticket tech and lifestyle gadgets.

But not anymore. I going to cut spending and invest. So its not savings la. Stupid? Maybe. I already made losses. But 2008 is going to be a near recession year. If i invest now, all I need to do is to wait a few years and then when the economy is up, I would've have gotten a good bargain on all my equities.

That's the simple logic. Its tried and tested, BUT the question therein lies in where to put your money? Hmm. I'm guessing I'm overexposed in China, but Asia ex Japan looks good. I'll wait till prices start really dropping in the 1st quarter of this year to start snapping up undervalued stocks.

Money money money. Enough about money.

I bought a new bike! Woohoo. A GT Aggressor. Haha. I LOVE my bike. Its so light, comfy, and yes, tough enough not to buckle under all the kerb bashing I do. Mmm.

I still can't do a basic trackstand, I guess I have to practise some more. I guess my arse is too heavy.

Well that's all. I really hope for all the best to all my friends. We're turning 20 soon. My GOD. WE ARE DAMN BLOODY OLD.

To the guys in NS, don't despair. Though we haven't accomplished much in life because of NS, there's still time for us to grow into captains of industry (I Hope la). Haha. I'm talking to myself actually.

And to the girls, good luck in uni. Graduate well, get a good job and stay hot.

No la, I'm not dying, I just feel old. Call it a first-quarter life crisis.

Ah well. Happy new year.
1 more year to ORD!
20 months to uni!

Woohoo!

Oh, and Audrey, after seeing the pics, I finally realised you weren't wearing full pink that day. I guess I associate you with pink too much. But you have to admit, there was a little pink on you. So I'm not totally blur.

こんにちは!! Back from the land of the rising miniskirt

2007-12-15T22:30:00.000-08:00

I'm back. So tiring. Have a bad cough. I'm hot, so I guess the cold was antagonistic with my sexy body. Heh.

But I had loads of fun. I truly experienced Japanese culture, albeit it was just a miniscule fraction of what Japan truly is.

Oh, and I met Audrey!!! 5600+ km from home and even that was no hindrance for me to meet up with an NTU cheerleader dressed up in pink in Disneyland. Major coincincidence. Tokyo is huge, Disneyland is huge, and I bumped into her. Oh, and I was so shocked I forgot to take a photo of this amazing happenstance. Stupid. And yes, I did comment this in my cbox, but it disappeared.

Anyways, what did i do there, you may ask?

Day 1

Landed in Tokyo. Spent some time at a Narita hotel, can't remember the name. I thought it was a crummy hotel, cos the room was super small. Little did I know, hotel rooms would get smaller as their locations got better.

Went shopping at a mall, ate Japanese food, which btw, I don't like. Half of the food I ordered tasted absurdly fishy, and I chose a dish that was fully cooked. But the tempura and the roasted horse mackerel/tuna/I don't speak Japanese fish was superb.

I never tasted saefood so fresh, succulent and juicy before. And I have cut and gutted prawns and fried them alive just to get the freshest prawns and yet their prawns tasted fresher. Mmmm.

Day 2

Went to Mt Fuji. It was a 3hr coach ride. I was disappointed as the road was closed as Mt Fuji is dangerous during winter, so we were only allowed to stop at two-fifths of the mountain. It was boring and lousy, as the pics sucked. We were too low for scenery. The cold was very bad. 3'C is very cold indeed. But no snow. So sad. I'm about to be 20, and I have never touched snow. If only we could have gone higher.

Checked into a hotel near Mt Fuji. Was asked to try the hot springs. Shy la, but in the end i braved it, and there was no one there. Haha. Why was I shy? Cos you have to go nude into the spring. Being naked in 5'C cold and then entering into a 50'C hot spring was one of the most unique expereinces ever. I was freezing, but to put my feet into hot water was insane. But I went in anyway. And I came out with skin as smooth as that woman from the Last Samurai. (But I'm still hotter than Tom Cruise).

The spring is indeed a cool Japanese tradition. You sit there naked in the cold outdoors, but you're warm, protected in the spring. Not to mention that Japanese culture dictates that if the women's spring is full, women can come over to the men's hot spring and vice-versa.

Unfortunately, the hotel wasn't full that day. Damn.

Day 3

You know how I was disappointed that i didn't get to see Mt Fuji? Well, the sutpid CD mat in me didn't have common sense. You can't see the mountain if you're on it. But you can see it if you're looking at it from a distance.

I woke up in the hotel room with a brilliant view of Mt Fuji. Magnificent. It was picture perfect. Just like in all the tv shows. Beautiful. I don't see why the tree huggers want to save the environment, but now I do. Nature is so beautiful. Its just that singapore has no nature.

Went back to Tokyo. Did some shopping in Harajuku, Tokyo's equivalent of Paragon. Why not Orchard Rd? Cos its like paragon. All branded shops. Burberry's, Chanel, Mont blanc, etc.

The only store which I could afford stuff from was Zara, which was entirely disappointing, cos all the stuff there I could find in singapore.

After that we went to Shinjuku. Now, that's a better place. It has shops more suited to the masses. Went around, looked at all the weird Japanese stuff, but still couldn't find anything worth buying. So I headed into the back lanes, looking for more bargains. And here, the land of the weird and the schoolgirls and the miniskirts in the middle of winter thrived. Adult video and toy shops were everywhere, right next to convienience stores, eateries and the like. It was crowded, like a normal singapore street, but it had sex shops in between. Moi, being innocent, but curious went into one of the shops. Wah, porn videos, toys, contraceptives, everywhere. I got out of the shop after taking a picture, (pics later) and was stopped by a man.

I was scared. Shit. Did he see me take a picture in the shop?

He muttered something in Japanese. I gave him a blur look. Then he proceeded to say, "Do you want sex? Do you want sex? Very good."

WTF?!?

I enter a porn shop out of innocent curiosity and now I was stopped and being touted with sex by a pimp, who could possibly be just a robber, or worse, a gay man attracted to me?

I said, "No. No yen. No yen. Arigato." And I walked quickly out to the main streets of Shinjuku, carefully not veering off too far into the side streets.

Crazy. Offering me sex in the middle of a crowded street.

I later met up with my tour group shortly after.

Haha. All in all, it was truly a new unique experience.

Vishnu said I should have asked the guy how much he was offering. Haha. Maybe I should have.

Haha. Pervert.

Day 4
DISNEYLAND! Not paticularly fun, cos I like scary rides, and disney is filled with kiddy rides. But the fun and clean family atmosphere was simply breathtaking. The disney experience simply envelopes you from the gate to the exit at the end of the day.

I'm a changed man. I like disney now.

Oh ya. I met Audrey there also. Dressed in a hot pink sweater. Pink looks nice on her.

Lots of pictures, but I didn't buy much souveneirs as I felt they were astronomically overpriced. But I bought a buzz lightyear pen cos it had the cute green martians on it, and a crystal drinking glass, with my name engraved on it. It has a Winnie the Pooh stem. Classy and cute. And the engraving serves my narcissism well.

Day 5

Checkout day. Dint do much, did some shopping at a branded outlet mall. Was tempted to buy the s$60 Levis jeans, but I have too many already.

But i did buy a watch. A Fossil watch, with kinetic movements, only available in Japan. Cool. But I regret buying it, cos now I have to replace my old swatch watch. Its been with me for 4 years. Through O levels, A levels, Biz Club, NCC, up till the day I ursurped my mentor in CD by taking over his place, and outranking him.

I guess I can forge new memories with my new watch. Graduate with 1st class honours in NTU (haha, fat hope), 1st job, 1st million (after which I'll get my Tag Heuer), etc.

Flew back on North West airlines. Worst airline ever. They were having a strike. The seating was all over the place, AND during the flight the pilot was serving coffee in economy class!! Not the captain of course, but the other 2 low ranking junior pilots.

Haha. This post is getting too long, and I simply can't describe the innumerable things I've experienced these past 5 days, so I'll let pictures paint the words aye.

There's a lot of culture in Japan. They are a mordern people, but they don't lose sight of their traditions.
Soon to be school girls and boys. Train hard. Look pretty for the tourists.

Took this at some smaller theme park. Needed a more adult ride considering disney had none.

I must say, falling 20 storeys is not so fun as I initially thought. No suicide by jumping for me.

I like you the way you are, no need to buy all those extras.

Tatami mats!!!

The food I bought. Fish and tempura were heavenly, the dessert was orgasmic but the rest were not my cup of raw food.

Damn nice mango pudding with pumpkin ice cream below.

Delightful indeed!

Mt Fuji is so beautiful with me in front of it.

Go to school my dears. Go!

Weird signs for a toilet eh.

The pic that almost got me mugged by a pimp.
Walk girls, walk.

The Land of the Rising Schoolgirls

2007-12-08T09:58:00.000-08:00

Did you know they ban the word shit on the comment box? hoho. Only I can put asteriks on my comment box. What is the world coming to when you can't use the word shit. Haiyo.

Well folks, I'm off to Japan. I'm not paticularly excited as I have some issues that will be hindering my fun.

I'm rather excited with the fact that I'll be able to venture into the country that has invented such a society and culture that is so vibrant and unique.

What's so vibrant and unique? The years of temples, samurai, emperors, kimonos and the like?

No. I was thinking of Japanese schoolgirls dressing like those in anime. Hoho.

And Vishnu wondered why I asked him to help me buy the 4GB memory stick for my camera at SITEX. (And why was the fair so small this year?)

It'll be cold there, but I should think that the sights will keep me warm.

And as I have to leave at an ungodly hour of 3a.m monday morning, I should sleep early today.

Lastly, just some business. My unit trusts have been gradually but surely are about to break even. My losses now are about 6.45% up from a high of 19.85%, with goood appreciation in fundamentals driving the increase. The prices would mean my UTs are not overvalued and hence I foresee breaking even by early Jan 2008.

I guess I will be making my earlier projected gains before the Olympics after all.

The Bounty VS. The Potato

2007-11-15T08:17:00.000-08:00

I swear, uni girls blogs are so damn depressing. Can you imagine that after the hell of the A levels, uni life is so much more difficult? Life sucks. And yes, my sister lied. Uni's not all fun and games, unless of course you take some slack course like Building and Estate Mgt (10 yrs ago when no one wanted it). But its fun to blog hop and see the many changes that have blotted the girls I knew.

Anyway, I went to watch the Kingdom with my colleague. We got free tickets to the National Fire and Civil Emergency Preparedness Council Charity Movie Screening.

Like what a hell of a mouthful.

Anyways, the movie was full of US bullcrap but it was an ok movie. But the movie isn't my point.

It was the damn hot girl sitting beside me. But that wasn't entirely it. It was the hot girl wearing a microdress ( or whatever you call it, the kind of dress that exposes part of her butt cheek when standing and a whole lot of thigh when she was sitting down) and straddling a cup of KFC whipped potato.

Yes, you heard me right. It wasn't the bounty of hot female human thighs that piqued my interest. It was the cup of KFC mashed potato that she was balancing between her thighs and eating from that was stimulating.

KFC mashed potato vs. hot girl. ***KFC WINS!***

Good god, I'm obsessed with food.

On another note, my astronomical losses of my portfolio have been somewhat cushioned by my dollar cost averaging (DCA) measures.

I managed to bring down my losses form 16% to 9.6% after DCA.

Still have yet to break even. But I'm ok. China's growth is set at 10.8% next yr. So let's hope for a really good year ahead.

Closing Down the Shutters

2007-11-13T08:18:00.000-08:00

I made a 16% loss in my portfolio. The post below was bad, now its worse, cos its finally showing monday's bloodbath.

This kind of losses would mean that there's a high chance I will never get to see my principal amount ever again.

I can dunp what little reserves I have left to cushion the blow when markets reach a technical rebound, but I doubt I'll be seeing my money again.

Now, good night and good luck, cos the Big Z has been declared a bankrupt at the age of 19.

I predict I'm only going to see my cash when I ORD in 2009.

There goes my dreams of being the big boss of a multi-million dollar company, cos I can't even manage my own small cash reserves.

Aiyoh, with my losses, I could have paid for my entire driving lessons.

Damn. What a way to go.

Good night, finance reports will resume once I'm no more in the red.

Next up, movie update on The Kingdom and my Ubin trip.

Same shit. Different day.

2007-11-12T07:01:00.000-08:00

F***! KNNBCCB! SHIT! SHIT! C*** B**!

I lost 10%. Shit. Fuck. Shit. The late sell-down on Friday on wall street along with China's credit tightening, has caused WORLD markets to tumble, drop and get shot in the head. But like hell, all your torment doesn't kill you. You wake up, and you get tormented again.

Markets are set to fall MORE.

And I NEED to buy more to really average this out.

But I don't have money! ARGH!

I'm down to my last 25% of cash. I think I'll buy more tmw and on wed.

I need to average this catastrophe out. If I don't I'll lose out.

But if I'm wrong, I'm in deep shit.

SHIT as in F***ING shit.

Invictus!

2007-11-09T23:12:00.000-08:00

Refer to post below.

Did dollar cost averaging work? HELL YEAH.

Were my paper losses great? HELL YEAH!

Will this translate into actual tanglble losses? Most probably F*** YES.

With rising crude prices (if you look at previous posts, were the reason for me being optimistic), plus the start of the true backlash of the sub-prime crisis in the US, coupled with steep losses in large US MNCs for the third quarter, combined with the resignation of 2 big-wig CEOs, plus the fact that banks the world over are facing billions of dollars in write-offs, together with a depreciating US dollar and concerns of further tightening of the Chinese economy, are among many of other concerns that have caused world stock prices to tumble down like humpty dumpty atop Mt Everest.

Good time to buy? That's what I thought. I bought, and yes, dollar cost averaging did help my portfolio losses to drop from nearly 10%, to a less heart-attack inducing of 7%.

To think that 12 days ago, my portfolio had a 2% gain, and now its a 7% loss.

Could be worse, I guess, it could be 10%-15%.

Aiyoh. And now, I'm down to the last 25% of my investable money that is still in cash form. I need ta save my ammo and select the correct time to put my last vestige of cash at the right time, in the right fund.

Wish me luck.

To buy or not to buy?

2007-11-05T06:37:00.000-08:00

Crap.

I bought some more units on friday thinking that I would be taking advantage of the decrease in share prices and hence practise good dollar cost averaging.

NOT. China's premier just announced several set conditions for the implementation of a much-hyped scheme that allows mainland chinese to trade in HK shares, leading to a further postponement.

This very same scheme caused stock prices to jump by 40%, now its probably going to drop back to its original levels. NOOOOO!

But I did buy some more today. I REALLY hope dollar cost averaging works.

If not, my losses will not only be on paper, but it will be very tangible indeed.

Finally, the chinese market correction is here, right on time as analysts predicted. Hoho.

Why do we fall Bruce? So we can learn how to pick ourselves up.

2007-11-02T03:55:00.000-07:00

Holy crap, I broke even! NOT!

Holy crap, I made a loss!

Haha. My paper gain has now become paper loss. LOL.

The very same factor (surging crude prices) driving up the prices of my unit trust, was its own undoing.

Prices tumbled slightly, due to the fact that companies are wondering what effect the oil crunch will have on present and future growth, leading to slight decrease in stock values.

Then today right, I was listening to newsradio 93.8, (which I find rather useless, cos they broadcast news from the whole wide world for 55 mins of an hour, and cram all business news in 2 mins. But I need it cos SCDF doesn't allow internet acess on its computers.) they said that Citibank needed to raise 30 billion bucks of capital because of some losess due to the sub-prime thing. Citibank's shares dropped 8% and world stocks tumbled like how I do after running 2.4k.

So i checked my colleague's com, and whoppee-doo, the Hang Seng dropped by a thousand points plus. Haha. That's a huge current loss for me, but it's finally here. The minor market correction. So I popped slightly less than half of my remaining investment reserves into my HSBC china fund.

I'll reserve the other half for the government induced correction later this month.

But enough on money. That's all I talk about these days. But its what drives me nowadays. I need money to go to camp, need money to eat, to go out, to buy nice things.

Yes, I lead a lonely life. But its not all my fault. I'm in CD for goodness sakes. I can't exactly go out with CD people to smoke under the block.

Anyways, I got promoted today. finally, after missing the August promotion, I got promoted today. By right, I'm supposed to be promoted in January, due to too many MCs from meningitis, but my officer got the help of my director who used her 2 crabs to get me promoted.

But you can't penalise me for contracting a deadly brain membrane infection? After all, I'm one of the few in my dept who has a functioning brain, so you have to promote me right?

And now I have to give a treat with another guy, which amounts to me forking out around $50-$60. COME ON! My pay increase as LCP is only $20. Hello?

They said its no sweat, cos I earn money from tuition. Like Hello? I drag my fat ass to class every night. I put in my sweat and blood into earning my meagre $17/hr.

Speaking of tuition, my incumbent EM3 student passed, and against my expectations made it, with all passes. YAY! Going to ask for pay adjustment soon.

And my expenses have skyrocketed ever since I bought my phone. Haha. I adopted the 'I busted my budget for this month, I might as well go all the way attitude'.

Yup. I got more interesting stuff to share, about the markets, CD and stuff in general.

But my fingers are aching, and I don't want to get carpal-tunnel syndrome.

That's all for today folks.

Revitalisation Of JBank?

2007-10-30T06:45:00.000-07:00

Holy crap! I broke even !!!!

Wohoo! I made 0.74% gain on my China equities. Whee...

That may not seem like much, but I had to pay off the 2% sales charge remember? Hoho.

I'm rich! I can buy a Macs Extra Value Meal, upsize and still have enough money to buy a $0.60 ice-cream cone!

Now that's what I call rich. Haha.

But seriously, this are all paltry paper gains, like I said, earlier, fuelled by the rise in crude prices and the impending Fed cut.

But when the hell is my China correction coming? Aiyoh. By the time it comes, the prices may have risen so much, it won't be much of a correction anymore, then I might as well buy now.

So many options.. Aiyoh.

And yes, I need to do something to improve my standard of health. Its getting out of hand.

Bring It On : All or Nothing Part 2

2007-10-29T08:58:00.000-07:00

va-va-voom : informal
n. the quality of being exciting, vigorous, or attractive.
adj: her va-va-voom figure.
— origin 1950s (orig. US): representing the sound of a car engine being revved.

If anyone could be guilty of epitomising and personifying that phrase, one can look no further than this place.

No I'm not talking about me, you dimwit. I'm just gorgeously dashing.

Go look for this person. She's been mentioned here before.

Note to self: Should have made more audio recordings.

The Talented Mr Ripples

2007-10-29T07:44:00.000-07:00

Well hello. My P5 student msg me today out of the blue. HoHo...

I called her immediately. And yes, it was good news. She passed English AND Maths! Woohoo.

Science is a definite pass for her, cos I've screwed and hammered a lot into her crummy brain.

But Maths!?! Wah leow. I should start a tuition centre if I can make her pass.

At this rate, she won't go to EM3. YES!! I'm so glad I've made such a difference in her life. She's not on the EM3-Normal Stream- ITE trail, because I was there to save the perpetual F student.

Tooting my own horn you say? But of course. No one's going to toot it for me when I ask her dad to increase my fees.

You see, with the amount of hours I'm putting in, I earning a measly $17+ an hour.

The gay idiot in my office who flunked his A levels and who's retaking again this year (without studying he says he can pass, because there's no pressure)is getting $25 an hour. Sure, he has to take a bus, and I only need to walk across, but the disparity between our pay is so great.

He goes there not because he wants to show results, but to pass the time to get cash. I actually care for the airheads I teach. I often get neck, chest and back pain coming home from tuition cos I'm so tense I could snap my neck with my neck muscles if the student fails another practise paper.

AND I've shown results. So yes, I'm going to ask for a raise that is more congruent with my performance and qualifications.

On another note, I've finally learnt how to use the UT account: all the timings, the processing lags and what not.

And I'm so eagerly awaiting the China market correction that will temporarily cause the stock prices to drop for a day.

Then again, I have to weigh how much the China correction will bring the stock down for that day, against the overall gain that rising crude prices and falling US Fed rates have between now and the impending correction.

BUT, I have a more or less demarcated time when the correction will occur, that is before the Nov 5 IPO of Petrochina. (if analysts are correct)

Regardless of whether I use the correction to take advantage of dollar cost averaging, or buy now to take advantage of rising crude, in the long run, it will still gain cos China's economy is set to grow 10.8% in 2008. This is excluding any unforeseen booms due to the Olympics.

Yep, I've been listening to the news, and yes, I barely understand 1% of it, but its getting more or less clearer by the day. The problem is, as with the news bits I gave you above, is that having a long term strategy is fine, but there are so many opportunities to take advantage of to make more gains than the average investor. Problem is, I don't know what to do. Haha.

Care to give me some advice? I'm as Lost as Jack when he got off the island, and wanted to go back in the season finale of Season 3. Haha. I still can't believe that they got off the island in the end. Season 4 is going to be so cool. There's going to be flashbacks and flashforwards. Hohoo.

What a difference a day makes...

2007-10-24T03:13:00.000-07:00

That's a nice Jamie Cullum song. And so true. A difference of a day can mean a lot to many different people.

Haha. And to those readers who think I opened JBank, I haven't ok. All this while some people have been thinking that all my entries were related to JBank and its clients.

Well, to clear the air, JBank remains closed.

Anyways, why the more merry mood today, you ask?

Well, firstly I had audit today at 2nd Div. Wah, the place is so airy and nice.

And I got to wake up at 8am today to go to camp, reached there at 9.30, and had breakfast till about 11. Then at 1pm, my colleague drove us to Century square, where I ate my favourite chicken chop fried rice.

Then to boot it off, the audit ended at 4pm. And I got to spot lots of major mistakes in the audit. I just love to sabo CD people.

What's more, today is the last lesson of tuition before the school hols. Plus I get my fees tonight. Finally a break from tuition almost every day. I can watch my shows, learn more stuff, and play XBox.

To top it all off, my 6.04% loss in my UTs has been reduced to 2.43%. (all figures include the 2% initial sales charge)

Topped up some more into the UT, which has finally finished processing, now I can rest easier.

The audit continues tmw. I hope that means prices rise further. I feel like watching a movie tmw. Rendition sounds like a good movie.

Slow and Steady does not win the race

2007-10-23T03:24:00.000-07:00

You know, I still don't get how the system works at fundsupermart.com.

My first purchase for my HSBC Chinese equity has been priced but is still processing, but my more recent Cash fund purchase has been completed.

My Cash fund has already accrued some interest, and I can use the fund to buy more unit trusts without the time lag from internet banking payments. Its like letting them hold your money, so you can buy more UTs faster, but with a higher interest rate of 2.121% p.a. which is 9 times better than a bank.

So no problem there. Money has grown, albeit a little.

BUT my HSBC UT is still processing. F%^& YOU!

They gave me Thursday's pricing, which has NAV of $186.54.
Today's NAV value has dropped to $178.991.

Fine. Its ok that I lost 4.05% of my money (excluding the 2% preliminary sales charge).
They aren't responsible for markets going up or down.

BUT! They are responsible for ensuring that the UT is mine, and that I'm able to do anything I wish with it. I cant buy more of the same fund, cos the previous pruchase hasn't finished processing. Good god. Its almost a week. I can't sell it yet also, cos the processing isn't done.

Crap man. I wanted to top up more of the same fund so that I could average out the cost by buying it lower now. But I guess its fated that I don't buy it now. Maybe its so that I'll buy more tmw when the price plunges further.

But I seriously hope that this stupid US sub-prime thingy won't derail the olympics boom. Cos if it does, I'm not going to afford a laptop for uni. haha.

This whole thing is starting to lose its humour actually.

Who stole my cheese?

2007-10-22T08:25:00.000-07:00

You know, this particular unit trust I’ve been eyeing has been having 23% gains on average every month.

God damn, sitting on my ass every day, I could more than double my money in 4 months.

Then, my sister takes forever in setting up my account, the internet banking lag time is 2 days, the online fund house lag time is 2 days, so by the time my purchase gets through, I lose out on the gains in that few days.

But now I’m the proud owner of the HGIF Chinese Equity fund.

Yes, the proud owner of shit.

On the bus today, they were talking about the spillover of the US sub-prime markets, that the US will be in near recession by next year.

Who cares about the US? China and HK stocks weren’t very much shaken in August when the whole sub-prime thing blew up. They recovered, and have resumed their pre-August values.

BUT, then they went to talk about a whole slew of other shit that predicts that Asian stocks will tumble.

And tumble it did. The Hang Seng tumbled by 3.5% today.

And my value of my trust was Friday’s value (pre-Monday tumble).

Shit man. In the first place, I don’t even understand what the hell sub-prime is, and I can barely comprehend a single thing they say on channel news asia.

I watched the news for 15 mins on the bus, and all I understood was the stuff in bold above.

Haha. I am so going to lose my money.

On the other hand, the tumble is alright. I can always buy more, and hope that when you average it out its ok. Anyways the only reason why I’m buying China UTs is because of the ching-chang-chong Olympics in 2008. Hope that that spillover effect will benefit me, and not some speculative US loans crap which requires a PHD in economical bullshit to understand, that will cause me to lose my university reward money.

So I guess I shouldn't even bother with all this stuff, cos I'll end up losing my money. But if no one loses money, how are others supposed to gain? Anyways, all in all there will be gains, it just depends on whether my gains will be in peanuts or Singapore dollars.

Speaking of money, my Hari Raya yield is getting lower and lower. Sure, my mum gives more, along with my sisters and brother in law. But relatives are giving peanuts or none at all.

And they’re starting to ask about whether I’m getting married soon or not. Get a life man. Marriage. That’s the only thing on a Mat or Minah’s mind. And apparently my Chinese and Indian colleagues’ minds also.
They get married in NS, then a baby, or heck, sometimes the babies come first.

Hoho.

But they don’t think, planning is key. Money, stability is key to survival. You can’t have a wife when you’re raking in peanuts. You can’t have a child in NS.

And as to answer the questions of my relatives as to whether I have anyone in mind, I tell you nicely to Foff. I’m still young ok.

Lots of money to earn. Lots of food to buy with that money. To me a relationship is only worth it once you’ve put yourself first. Then only can you think of another person. And hey, I have too little experience putting myself first. (I’m not narcissistic. I’m handsome.)

Anyways on the matter of investing in myself, I just blew a wad of my remaining cash on driving. WTF. Comfort is trying to kill me man. I booked my FTT, and like 10 lessons in Dec. FTT is in Jan. Hope I can drive before I turn 20 in March (AHEM. Birthday. In. March.). Then at least I can say I’ve added value to myself this year.

Anyways, the year is coming to an end. What are your new year’s resolutions?

Mine are:
To lose the lard I’ve gained since I POPed.
To achieve at least 17% returns on my UTs.
To save 90% of my 2008 tuition income. (Pending me not getting fired cos my student ends up in EM3. Which is 50-50)

I think that the second and third goals are achievable, pending my employer’s approval, and a good Olympics.

But the first one. Now that’s a gargantuan resolution. One which in all probability, you shouldn’t even bet monopoly money on. Haha.

Well, toodles everyone. I’ll be back here next week. Feel free to drop me a mail. Don’t bother sending me MSN things when I’m offline. Cos I go onto MSN bi-monthly. So if you see me online, and I don’t reply, that’s not me.

Haiqal said I got hacked. He chatted with me several times, but I dint reply even though I was online for hours. I’m never online for hours eh. I fall asleep whenever I touch technology that’s got nothing to do with an Xbox.

Win a date with Zul Hammyton

2007-10-11T03:20:00.000-07:00

Wah, nanapok. Once the festive season hits, my wallet dies. My mum gave me a larger than usual budget this year, seeing as how I didn't buy many clothes last year, as it was the A levels then, so I didn't have time to shop.

She calls it love. I call it love AND dollar cost averaging.

So this year, faced with the numbness and regularity of my job, I took 3 half days of leave and went shopping like a crazy rabid moronic girl.

Let's review my shopping disasters:

Baju Kurung: $78.00
Head gear: $10.00

I had to please my benefactor, so I got those purchases out of the way. I buy festive clothes once every 3 years, cos I don't see why I should buy one every year. I wear it for like 2 days max and it gets chucked in my cupboard for a year.

Unless Vishnu is playing the part of some racial harmony thing and then it may get out of my cupboard again.

Then I went shopping for real clothes, the ones that I'll be using for going out, and perhaps uni, seeing as how its only a year away. (God, I'm old.)

And there went my budget, and my tuition earnings.

Zara Shirt: $99.90
Tangs shirt: $129.90
Aldo Shoes: $157.50
Dockers Pants: $97.50
Socks: $12.90

So yes, people. I've taken your advice and imparted on a sartorial journey to dress better.
As you can see, Mr You-know-who, I replaced the cowboy shoes.
I also added 2 more shirts to the few I have.
And I bought pants that are not brown.

Happy? Haha. Now its going to be more difficult predicting which shirt and pants I'm going to wear aye?

I was thinking on whether I spend too much, or too exorbitantly. But, I was raised to appreciate quality, not quantity. ( Somehow the teaching dint apply to food. Hoho.)

So yes, I may have fewer clothes than a normal person, so much so that you can predict which shirt I'm going to wear, but the quality is there all the time. 1.5 years on, and my shirts still look as though I bought them a week ago.

So in the end, I spend the same as someone who changes his/her wardrobe every 3-6 months.

Speaking of quality, I recently cut my losses on a venture. I invested too much time, thought and resources into this venture. YET, it didn't give me the returns that I wanted. Certain friends told me to just hold onto the stocks, so I kept investing and checking up onto it from time to time. There were flashes of potential now and again, but in the end, till today, returns were zip. So i decided to pull out. Yes, Hafiz said I'm stupid, but I think he's overestimating the potential of this venture.

As my wise friend Mamat Muhd put it, 'If you have to ask whether this venture is worth it, then its definitely not.' Ok la, he dint say that, but I construed his advice to be as such.

And now, I feel so much better. I feel free.

And to end this whole pointless entry, for which I'm surprised you didn't skip to the end, (you did didn't you? that's why you're reading this, you bastard.) on a meaningful note, let's take Muhd's advice and apply it to all our lives.

If you have to ask whether something is worth it, then its not worth it in the first place.

For that Muhd, you won a date with me to watch Resident Evil.

Invasion Of Private-sy

2007-10-05T08:35:00.000-07:00

WTF?!?! I ain't no fan of the net, but when it wrongly accuses me of doing stuff I don't do, its the last straw.

I hate technology ok. Finally logged onto friendster properly after 4 months and did something cos my colleague added me, so I needed to spruce things up.

Then I went blog surfing, and wanted to drop a comment and voila! Wrongly accused of a serious crime.

Aiyoh.

Got to clear my cookies and cache then. Haha.

A Portfolio Change: From Xbox to Lard, returns hit record mass!

2007-10-03T09:16:00.000-07:00

Hello folks.

So I logged on to my friendster! After nearly 60 days of inactivity. Still no friends there. They should put a disclamer: Does not help you to find friends, you moron. Neither does it help you to remember people's names if you don't give a shit, you forgetful prick.

Anyways, I've been blog hopping and once again, I've noticed a dramatic change in everyone I know, in just a span of 2 months.

Take Audrey for example: She's a cheerleader now! Lots of brains, now she's super-hot cos she's a cheerleader. oooo. Not that she wasn't hot in the first place. AHEM. I'm speaking objectively ok!?

A lot more people, guys and girls included, have moved on, for the very much better.
Though Sing is not in OCS now, he's at least in SISPEC. A few others are doing so well in their schools, both in terms of a vibrant social and academic lives.

I too have tried to improve myself, by doing several things, including research on certain stuff. Alas, none of the things I'm doing now have anything to do with me getting off my fat ass.

Things change. People change.

But some things don't. Take my hotness for example. Every night without fail, I get a msg wishing me good night from my student. And in the afternoon, I get a report on whether my homework is done. "If i get 50, will you like me?"

WTF. I was joking la, when I unwittingly phrased my questions in a dirty ah-pek tone, the last time I asked her for lessons.

But WTF, she's a small kid. Aiyoh, hotness knows no boundaries, it ensnares all prey, babies and all. And apparently, I'm too hot for myself.

But on a side note, at least she's more into me than most other people. At least she doesn't play impossible-to-get. (though the ACJC gay in my office is impossible-to-get-him-to-fuck-off).

Ah well, back to sleeping, eating and Xboxing. Finished Halo 3. Master Cheif died in the end, FUCK.

Going to buy Bioshock and a 2nd hand edition of Shadowrun, then I can play all these online when tuition is on a hiatus for the school holidays.

And hopefully my sister makes good on her suggestion to teach me fund investing. Cos after fasting for a month, I realise how much money I waste. I spend hundreds of dollars a month on food, and movies. Hot damn. I'm a bonafide lardy ass.

Hoho. Take that Planet Fitness recruiter!

Tab TV: The Nissan Edition

2007-09-30T08:59:00.000-07:00

I treasure my friends, for I can say that I know many people (but most of the time not thier names, cos I'm a forgetful bastard), but the few friends I have are very good friends indeed.

You know who you are, whether I go out with you every week, or I have not returned your headphones in months, or even those that don't even read this thing, I treasure our friendship.

Isyraf is right. We are growing old. Among Sing, Vishnu and Isyraf, I'm the oldest among all of them, and to put it simply, i have not many accomplishments to be proud of.

Which brings me to the fact that I have to improve myself. How? I'm working on it.

Anyways, congruent with my sad and lonely life, I finished Halo 3 in 9 hours. Master chief died in the end. Fuck. They just killed off a multi-million dollar franchise and any chance of making a movie.

Ah well. Anyways, back to the topic of unit trusts. My sister apparently, was too busy to come over this week, so she still hasn't given me my moolah to start investing. I have my eyes set on a few trusts I'm willing to put my money on, but as of now, I still don't have full privy to all the unit trusts sold in Singapore. Because in Singapore, to start investing, you need to be 21. So my sister needs to set up a beneficiary account. And she's taking awfully long to set it up. I need the account so I can use my weekdays to go fundpping.

On a side note, all the backalleys at geylang are so cool to drive around at night. We were looking for some tab tv material, but alas we only spotted a few traders plying their trade. Its ok, that's what a CD guy is for. I'll just ask my friends this week where all the trade shows are, and we can get some good reality tv next week. Hoho.

ZulDonald Gates

2007-09-23T05:58:00.001-07:00

Yesterday we all had a ball of a time. Vishnu, Sing and Isyraf came over to my house to watch a movie.

At first, we all were out already. Isyraf fetched me from my house, we proceeded on to fetch Sing, then Vishnu. Then we realised that Vishnu didn’t book the tickets.

Isyraf was cheering. Why? He didn’t want to pay $9.50 to watch Premonition.

Neither did I. I would watch if everyone wanted to. So I suggested that since I had a lot of movies at home, we all could watch it over at my place.

And boy, was I dressed to go home. So was Sing. All of us dressed in our Sunday best to go to my house. Whee.

So I connected my laptop to my tv. And mofo bloody hell, its clearer to do stuff on my tv than on the laptop. Further proof that plasma beats LCD.

And no one was happier to see 42 inches of pleasure than Sing. He couldn’t stop looking into my private files and folders.

Folders of pics we took back in MJ lah, you perv! I don’t have any ‘alternative’ stuff on my com.

We watched my movie, ate ice-cream, drank coke, and watched Son Of the Beach. I don’t know why no one found it smart and witty. Only Sing laughed a bit la, but Vishnu and isyraf were somewhat bored.

Then we went surfing around in friendster and facebook. I haven’t logged on my friendster account for so long that when other people view me, the “logged on since” function doesn’t show the last time I logged on.

Come to think of it, I can’t remember when was the last time I logged on. And that account is like only 4 months old. That’s quite bad. Haha

Had dinner today with my family. Ate 2 slices of pizzas, 7 sweet and spicy drumlets and lots of briyani. Hoho. Getting fatter and fatter aren’t we. I haven’t jogged in 4 months, and I tired doing so last week. Couldn’t finish quarter of a round around my estate. Tried again 2 days ago, I pushed myself, finished a round 3 mins off my timing 4 months ago, but I had to stop myself from doing another. Why?

Cos of a searing pain across my chest. Haha. I’m too young to die. But before you start preparing to auction away my things in preparation of my demise, rest assured, I’m still relatively healthy ok. It was just a cramp, caused by heavy breathing due to a lack of exercise, so my chest was overtaxed. Thanks wikipedia.

Anyways, I told my sister that the money books she loaned me were very useful and I asked her for more. She said she’ll try to find some more for me..

And she’ll be sponsoring my first 1k in a unit trust of my choice underneath my name. Woohoo!
Now, nothing’s set in stone yet, but all I know is that that 1k will help me learn about the process of investing cash.

I just hope that I can wear her down to actually give me that 1k. haha. She wasn’t explicit enough as to say whether it’s a loan or a free cash starter.

And in the spirit of charity, my mother has allowed me full usage of the small university cash present for me to invest. Its been sitting in an Islamic bank account under my name. It was supposed to be a present for me to buy my clothes, laptop, and phone, for the hard work (yeah right) I put in to go to uni.

So I managed to convince her that letting that money rot in a bank account was not as beneficial as giving it to me to invest it now, while I’m still free in NS and not needing the money yet.

On a side note, the Islamic banking account from OCBC has generated 1.64% DIVIDENDS p.a on my uni present. That is quite a high rate ah. Plus the fact that its not interest, its counted as halal derived money, therefore it can be used for food. I guess I can use some of my dividends to buy a bigger pair of pants.

So I guess now, its off for a learing journey. How am I to invest my uni present and my sister’s starter fund without losing it all?

I guess this is where SCDF has its benefits aye? I have time to research. And given that I’m in the finance department, where everybody from the directors to the clerical civilians invest their cash, there’s bound to be someone who can guide my hand.

Cos my sister is too busy, she’s just dumping the cash in my hands and expecting me to make a miracle.

Hullo? All I know now is to put that cash in my NTUC savings account. I’m no risk taker, especially when its my own money at stake. I guess that’s why, I’ll never be a ZulDonald Gates.

Swim, my little princess! Swim like the mermaid from pocahontas!

2007-09-21T09:55:00.001-07:00

Prodigious Accumulators of Wealth (PAW) : These are people who are disciplined enough to live below their means, and use their surplus money to invest and increase their net worth.

These people need not necessarily have high incomes. They can have a range of incomes, but their net worth is much higher than most other people in their income group.

Current Net Worth > Expected Net Worth

Under Accumulators of Wealth (UAW) : These are people who are not disciplined enough to live below their means. They may live from paycheck to paycheck or they may live above their means, sustaining their spending habits via credit and loans.

Current Net Worth < Expected Net Worth

How do you calculate expected net worth?

Multiply your age times your realized pretax annual household income from all sources except inheritances.
Divide by ten.
This, excluding any inherited wealth, is what your net worth is expected to be.

So for example, my NS pay is say $470. My age is 19.
Therefore: 470 X 19 = 8930
8930 / 10 = 893

My current expected net worth is $893. If you take away the cash I’ve saved up and I’ve been given from young, minus my earned tuition cash, my current net worth (cash earned from NS only) is much less than $893.

So I’m a UAW. Damn.

I did this test with my friend at HQ. He too went to JC, so he faces the same spending pressures. His expected net worth is the same, but his current net worth (likewise, only considering cash that he only saved and earned in NS only) is double of mine. The fact that he has served 3 months more NS still doesn’t make it an excuse for me to have less than half his net worth.

I spend too much.

So I decided to take some measures. As said earlier, to make things easier on oneself, make things automatic. My monthly savings account deducts a certain amount from my NS pay and transfers it to a high interest fixed deposit.

But what about the excess cash that I (hopefully) manage to save? It does not generate much interest. The normal 0.25% p.a. interest on your savings account is below Singapore’s inflation rate. (2% GST increase on everything you buy? and a further hike to 10% GST in the next few years?)
So basically not only do I spend a lot, but money that I’m saving and keeping in the bank is losing its value just by sitting there.

Life sucks eh?

Not exactly. If you look around, you can actually save and make your money grow, or at least sustain itself. My monthly savings account will eventually provide me with the capital to invest when it matures in 2 years time, when I actually know how to at least not lose my money by making the wrong choices.

So what about the depreciating money in the bank?
I suggest 2 options. Put it into a fixed deposit account to generate interest that will at least cover part of the loss due to inflation.

POSB provides the best services for our age group: Minimum $1000 deposit. Period of 1-12 mths available. So basically you can select a 1 mth tenure, and when it matures, your money will lock itself for another month, unless you call the bank to do otherwise.

OCBC provides a little higher interest, though minimum cash required is $5000. Tenure policies are similar.

Interest rates for both is about 0.375%

* Go check the rates yourself first, before doing anything, don’t blame me if anything is wrong you lazy shit.

Another option is to have a high interest savings account. That’s what I’m doing, (as I want to have the freedom to use my cash anytime anywhere and not lock in a fixed deposit)

And guess what? I found a damn good alternative. The Fairprice savings account. Its like a normal savings account from OCBC, BUT it has neither minimum deposit nor minimum amount needed in the account.

Plus its interest rate is 1%.

Its bloody higher than an f.d. plus it offers you the fluidity of nets. And you get linkpoints if you use the card at NTUC.

Cool. But I hope they approve my application for it though, I think I have too many accounts in OCBC. ( And all of them have no money.) haha.

I guess being a clerk in CD ain’t so bad eh? Who has the time to read up on all this shit at commando camp?

Speaking of work, my officer is going for his honeymoon. And now I’m in charge of his stuff. All the submissions for performance indicators, stats on payments and lots more of other stuff. I’m flattered that he trusts me, but hey! I’m only an NSF. I don’t understand all your stats calculations and all your numbers. I’m not in NTU yet! Aiyoh.

But he did speak to the director about my promotion predicament, and I’m “slated” for promotion in November. At least that’s what I read in the minutes of one of his meetings.

I should not have been penalised for my meningitis la. For goodness sake, you ask me to do all your thinking shit, you call me your asset, you promise me SGT if I pass my IPPT ( you might as well promise me a million bucks cos IPPT is like learning how to fly) but you don’t try to keep your asset happy. If this were the private sector, I would have left already.

Cannot tahan. I really feel like a stupid mat now. Given work I barely understand how to do and I still have to do it. Thank god I’m friends with one of the civilians who can help with all the calculations.

Maybe I should show him my MJ report card. (I never got above E for maths in 2 years of JC, except for the giveaway promos, where people got 98/100 and I barely passed. Hoho.)

How I managed to do the A levels is beyond my small mat brain.

Anyways, enough talk about money and stupid CD stuff.

I SAW MY STUDENTS SWIMMING TODAY! Hoho.

As I was walking home, I heard screams of help. Being the heroic CD clerk, who barely knows how to do CPR cos I forgot ready, I went to peek over at the pool. I saw 2 ang moh girls spraying each other with a water gun. Then I realised it was 2 of my students. So, being the concerned tutor, I went over to ask whether the small kid finished her homework. Lo and behold, she didn’t.

But now I know why she’s so tired for tuition, and why a P5 girl has tan lines all over her body. Not that I look, ok?!?!

Aiyoh she’s not the studying kind la. She wants to be an actress. I think she has talent. You should see her eyes water when I scold her during tuition.

As for her older sister, kudos to your smart ass, man. She’s the one who’s going to ensure that I retain my job next year. She scoring 80++ for her subjects.

Woohoo. Spell “iron rice bowl” anyone?

Prodigious Accumulators of Wealth

2007-09-18T07:43:00.000-07:00

Have you read the report about the NS guy who ran away with his rifle?

I know I'm just a CD mat, but let me give you my 2 cents' worth first.

"For serious security incidents such as those involving missing arms and ammunition, the unit’s Duty Operations Officer is required to report the incident to the Army’s General Staff Operations Centre within 30 minutes.
However, in this case, Corporal Teo, together with his firearm and ammunition, was discovered missing by the Guard Commander at 11.59pm on 2 September, but the Army’s General Staff Operations Centre was only informed of this incident at 3am the next day.
The Military Police were alerted at 3.30am and when their preliminary investigations showed that the missing firearm and ammunition were no longer on the camp premises, the Police were contacted at 5.45am."

"Guards on patrol duties are also required to make situational reporting to the guard room at half—hour intervals but these were not enforced properly or Corporal Teo’s absence would have been detected earlier."

Ok, let me say something first. NO ONE reports every half hour la. At least not in CD. And if certain friends of mine can sleep while on guard in the army, that means CD is not the only one 'relaxing in a korner'.

And like come on, if you were to really report lost guns within 30 mins of discovering someone missing, then there'll be a manhunt for every guy who failed to report cos he needed to take a shit.

But then again, this was not CD. Unlike us, the Army doesn't take 5 months to process everything.

Anyways, I got my portable DVD player. Its 5 months late. And it sucks. There are like smaller and better portable media players for $165, which is what they spent on each mat. (plus the one they gave is this cheapo china made one, that even the storemen themselves said will last for about 2 months)

I'd rather they give me a $150 cash voucher like what they got last year for CD day.

But then agian, its free. So thank you CD. Money well spent.

So today, I did forces for tutition with my P5 kid. Hot stuff man. Forces requires you to demonstrate push and pull, so I got to poke her, to illustrate that a beating someone is a push motion.

I got to pinch her, to illustrate that living things respond to external stimuli.

You get the picture. haha.

But yes, I really like my student. She's so cute la. Plus, she requires 5-6 sessions of tuition a week. Definitely her best quality, for both me and my wallet. Heh.

On another note, you know how I was so hyped up about reading all those investment books my sister loaned me? Well, they suck. They teach you how to be Prodigious Accumulators of Wealth (PAW), and how not to be Underaccumulators (UAW).

After reading though the first book, I've signed up for the OCBC monthly savings account, to become less of a mat and actually save part of my meager earnings.

But, the next step is to invest, and I'm on my way to being a millionaire. (Bear in mind you have to be frugal, which is not in my vocabulary). Anyways, the books wrote that if you start saving $100/mth when you're 19, by the time you're 59, you'll get $1,122,242.

Cool right? But WAIT!

That is if you earn compund interest of freaking 12%. Tell me what bank on earth pays compound interest of 12%? The thing i signed up for has a promo rate of 1.68% FIXED interest.

But if you do read the invest section in the Sunday Times, you see that most people they interviewed have returns of 20% on their investments.

Cool right? But WAIT!

They're freaking CFOs, stock brokers, fund managers.

They're not CD mats. So I guess there's one thing left to do.

Open up my account at Vishnu International Bank. Hoho.

The Latte Factor

2007-09-16T02:33:00.001-07:00

My sister has been giving me books on how to plan for my financial future. I now know that the tidy sum she has invested in several funds and her own personal cash is due to astute financial planning on her part, none of which is due to magic or her huge salary (which she should share with her brother).

What I learnt so far:

The latte factor. All the small unnecessary stuff that you buy on a daily basis, eg. Lattes which you can bring from home instead of buying from starbucks, can cost you thousands a year, money which in turn could have generated more cash.
Save what you can. Millionaires don’t go buying those nice JBL speakers. Entry level Creative speakers will do.
They NEVER borrow money from banks, but in my case my bank is the Vishnu International ( Interest free wad ).
They always have what unused money they have making more money in several trust, index, hedge or other kind of funds.
Most ( not all ) start young. And the sooner you start, the higher the chance of getting your first million before your retirement.
The more money you have, your gains will proportionately be bigger.
For the undisciplined like moi, you have to make it automatic, i.e. you have to invest the money as soon as you get it. You also can’t spend what you don’t see, if a proportion of your pay is channelled straight into a separate account for investment/savings purposes.

So after a short look at the several funds offered by our local banks, I realised that the thousands I’ve wasted on stupid stuff (latte factor) has cost me even more money.

Why? Cos I don’t have the minimum amount to start a fund.

Anyways, for those of you out there who like me, can’t save a single cent, my advice is, start slow.

I’m going to sign up for the auto-savings account thing for my bank account, where they deduct a certain preset amount from you, and transfer it to a higher interest account. The best thing is, there’s no penalty or extra charges. So the bank gets you to save, plus they give you about 1.3% interest, much higher than the current 0.25% your savings account fetches.

Using this method, you could set aside maybe $100 monthly. By the time you ORD and enter uni, you can shift your cash to a index fund, or buy that nice laptop you’ve been eyeing.

Best thing is, this method is automated, so like I said, you can’t spend what you can’t see. Definitely for people without discipline like me.

I sound like a damn salesman. Damn. But I guess, if I’m ever going to buy my silver Audi TT Quattro before the age of 35, I’ve got to start planning early.

‘Why so serious about your future now?’ You may ask me. Well, when Vishnu, Sing and I were in Isyraf’s car last week, I realised something.
WE ARE OLD!

We’re old enough to drive. Old enough to die in a red rhino crash at a traffic junction. Old enough to start worrying how in the hell we’re going to provide for ourselves.

Got to start saving. Got to stop spending. And I’ve got to terminate my credit card with Vishnu International. Haha.

The Tipping Point: Rise of the Lipids

2007-09-11T07:59:00.000-07:00

Wah. I didnt know that I could be such a violent person. What I did was so not me. It was so primal. I think I may be turning from fat boy to fat man. Hoho.

There's this ACJC failure in my office. He acts gay 24/7. Smacks everyone's ass, hugs and puts his dandruff laden head on you. Now that's not so bad right? Try having him around 5 days a week, for 5 months. Good god. Everyone is about to snap. We used to reason with him, but now we have to resort to physical means like simply pushing him away.

But yesterday, he pissed me off to the max. I just woke up from my lunch nap, and had a deadline to meet. He was putting his disgusting head on my shoulder and hugging me, and caressing my butt. I pushed him away, but after doing so for like 5 times, I said sternly, "Fuck off, or I'll smack your face you moronic piece of shit."

A normal human would have just stopped fooling around and realise that ppl needed to get some work done. But he's an idiot. So when he started grabbing my face, and in doing so, bending my specs which cost more than his life, I snapped.

Literally. I grabbed him by his collar, threw him on my desk, and pinned him against the cubicle wall. "Idiot! Even a dog knows when to fuck off. You a person or dog?" He looked at me, with the stubborness of a 3 year old child. I threw him across the table, and he slid off the table and fell onto the floor.

Woohoo. Funny as hell. I could have gotten a few days detention if anyone saw that. Thank god no one did.

BUT!

An hour later, he came back, again, head on my shoulder, but this time, he was massaging my neck. He then squeezed my artery. Whoa. That was the tipping point.

He was behind me, while i was sitting on my chair. So i elbowed his chest and got up. I twisted his arm, the way teck teng showed me how the police do it, and i started to crush his right wrist. By now he was helpless.

Heh.

"ok.OK. I stop. Stop crushing me."

So i let go off him and he continued doing my work. For 20 mins, he was standing behind me, staring at me. My civilian officer said maybe I caused him to become insane. Haha. He said I was too harsh.

But when someone says stop fooling around so many times and you don't stop, the person will snap. And I snapped. And I didn't see any of the civilian officers stop the fight. All the adjacent cubicles were occupied by them, and they kept quiet. Obviously, someone needed to smack him, but no one wanted to touch him, probably cos of his dandruff.

Anyways, I was thinking, as I always do, on how to cover my ass, just in case I get accused of bullying. First thing this morning, I told my officer the whole thing, including me pinning him down. I reiterated the fact that I reasoned with him first, and that I am not a physical person. I also told him that I do not want to be seen as an antagonist. I was antagonised instead.

And I told him the rest of the story, no spinning, no bullshiting. The whole truth, because I notice he has a knack for finding out the truth.

And it got sorted out in role call today that took like half an hour of my lunch.

Now that idiot touches me with a pen or pencil, and talks to me nicely.

Cool. I've learnt one thing today. That is reasoning with a moron alone doesn't work. You must smack it into him. But of course, ensure that any action taken is retaliatory, not pre-emptive. So you're never in the wrong.

I hope this story inspires all other people who get irritated till they can't take it. Smack at the right time, make sure its a validated smacking and be irritant free for the rest of your NS life.

** Note, I'm not exaggerating any of the throwing around parts. He's a small thin gay guy, who despite weighing lighter than a sack of rice, can't do a pull up. So even my pri 5 student can throw him around. (So ya la. I'm not that macho.) (And yes, my student would rather throw me around.)

Hoho. I never change.

The Hills have eyes

2007-09-09T03:12:00.000-07:00

Little do I know.. There are eyes watching. Everyday, after tutition, a pair of eyes stare at me, stalking my every movement from block 89 to 86.

Every day, the eyes watch, the mind stirs, but she doesn't want to succumb to my hotness.

WTF is this weirdo pervert talking about, you ask? Well, after some casual banter with one of my students about the cute pussies on the first floor, (2 Siamese cats) I discovered that my other student has been looking out the window every night to see me walk from her block to mine.

Ah, young infatuation and crushes. I can't blame her of course. I can add this to the innumerable and irreputable incidents which once again concretise my reputation as being damn bloody good looking.

Not only have I enthralled females the world over with my good looks, (Ms Universe called me again this morning), but I've now even captivated kids half our age. HAHA. I guess age is no barrier for the reach of my good looks.

Of course she likes you, she looks like a dolt right?

HAH! No! She's young, but hot. She's got her looks from her ang moh dad.

But too bad she's my "client" and therefore I must be professional and stuff, lest I lose my porcelain rice bowl.

Plus I think that the hot minah girls on the first floor ( the 2 Siamese cats' owners ) are hotter. They live right next to the pool, and their windows and curtains are always open. A bit exhibitionist to me, but after a bit of observation to and from tuition, they're JC ppl.

Hmm, hot minahs who have some smarts, living in the next block.

Wowee, I'm just a mat, but even I can do the odds on that and the odds are freaking impossible.

Tuition has brought nothing but benefits for me.

I've got more money now, and among the SIVZ gang, I'm the highest earner. (though I still have to sometimes borrow money from Vishnu, to make ends meet until my pay comes, but I'm working on that. My sis gave me a book on how to manage my money. But its impossible to get my mat brain to work. I can't seem to read engrish. And mats by nature borrow money, so I'm sorry.) But for some reason, I'm still the poorest.

Vishnu has a freaking 32 inch sony HDTV in his room.

How do I know this? Isyraf drove us in his own car to Vishnu's house.

Siu Sing is going OCS, a mere stepping stone to becoming a future engineering visonary.

And the mat is still poor and stupid. Hmph.

Tuition has also allowed me to explore the next block's nice cats, 2 purebred siamese, 2 tabbies and 2 purebred homosapien hotties of the minah-hottiecocus species. Haha.

Anyways, my sister just came back from Japan. (Nothing like talking about family to stop my imagination from running wild)

She says that japan rocks. Ok, enough about Japan.

I'm bored. I'm going to watch lost now.

We are CD.. We are CD... To be the best that we can be..

2007-09-03T09:20:00.000-07:00

Met Soo Yee just now on the way home. She looks nicer than the last time I saw her, which was like 9 months ago after the last A level paper I think.

How time flies. And how people change for the better. And guess what?

She's taking BUSINESS!!!! Shit man. Is everybody taking business now? Be it at some private uni, SIM or Changkat Changi 3-for-$10 uni, everyone is taking damn business.

I'm beginning to think that if i take Urdu literature and flunk it, my job prospects will be be higher than if i graduate with 1st class honours from NTU. Cos every Tom, Dick, Harry, Jane, Chan, Ahmad and Velu is taking business. And countless others are thinking of taking business.

Damn. Maybe I'll reapply next year for a PE degree, get a useless Masters and grow up to become a Mr Aidil from MJ.

Then I met John from Vishnu's class. We started talking about how crummy NS is. He's a clerk too, so we clicked instantly. Anyways, he was going on about how CD is becoming more and more prominent in the news and its role in society. At first, I thought he wanted to borrow money from me or sth, haha. But after a while, I realised he actually did think CD was useful.

LOL.

I must concede that yes, what he's saying is true. We do daily stuff that benefits society, we do prepare people for disasters, and we are one of the best in Asia, and we train more countries fire services instead of us training in other places, like in the crummy army.

Its all true. From the outside, CD may seem fine.

But to put it in the wise words of this NJC flunker who made more money after his A levels than I made in my lifetime, and who also just wrote a letter to Min_ef asking why he dint get posted to the army, he says " Its not that I want to enter the army because of the prestige, its the disgrace of being in _D that pisses me off."

*Fill in the blanks yourself. Gaaarmen watching. Haha.

At least one person respects the work CD does. Haha.

The Poseidon Adventure

2007-09-02T00:21:00.000-07:00

I watched Poseidon yesterday.

Man. What a lousy movie. The way they escaped from the ship was as realistic as me going running on my own cos I'm worried about my health. They tried to balance the impossibility of the escape by killing off the hot latino girl and my hot Kurt Russel, who happened to be a fireman turned New-York mayor. My kind of guy.

It was a waste of my time. I think I should stop rationing my lost and heroes episodes and just watch them.

Toodles.

Baris! Hormat ke hadapan, HOR-MAT!

2007-09-01T00:45:00.000-07:00

Hey. You see, according to the manpower distribution in the building, I'm an extra guy in my department, most probably a 'special order' clerk because of my qualifications, or maybe because I'm a rare find, seeing as I have a brain and all.

Anyways, more to this later.

So I'm in charge of accompanying my finance audit team to the respective places where we audit and help them out.

On Tuesday, I sat in the front seat of my colleague's car cos my officer went to the place by himself.

Now here I am, in uniform, in the front seat of the car, the provost stops the car, checks it, and allows us in.

Suddenly, from the guardroom, came out the division RSM. He looked at me, then saluted me.

LOL. I was like "um.. ok." He realised his mistake and started shouting for me and my colleague to wear our passes.

I know I look like an officer la. A Captain, nonetheless, but I'm not a captain yet. No need to salute la.

Then, during the audit, this division had just set up a mess. So they were super nervous about the audit. I had like 3 SSGs waiting and looking at me, ready to answer or grab any file I need at any time.

Ah, this makes me feel like I'm of use again.

But what I really can't understand is why people are scared shitless about audits. No corruption, no problem what.

And I tell you ah, garmen rules and regulations are a waste of time. The amount of paperwork to do something is rainforest-killing. Chop here, print this, chop that, print 2 copies in case the building burns down, send one copy to another department so they can file it and dispose of it 10 years later. Wah. Useless.

This post is rather pointless, I know. Anyways, I was thinking of buying a nitro-powered R/C car. It'll be fun, modifying the engine, painting a body.. The idea expanded into a buying a nitro helicopter. Fun, fun. It'll cost a bomb, but I can afford it la, all this tuition I'm having, all of it can't be spent on food, cos I'm running out of food to buy.

Then I pictured myself playing the thing. All alone, near the empty field near the bbq pits. What a sad sight. Then I realised that me wanting all this stupid stuff is cos I have more time than I can shake a stick at, like what someone said to me.

So here I am now, without an R/C vehicle, typing nonsense on a Saturday afternoon, cos I'm bored, but can't go out cos I have to see my sister off at night.

I need a bigger stick to shake.

And no, I'm not referring to that kind of stick to shake, you freaking dirty shit.

Low fat milk, please

2007-08-28T07:48:00.000-07:00

I don't know why, but I'm getting more and more lazy and tired all the time. Its like the drudgery of daily life is eating away at my life's spontaneity.

But enough rants and complaints, because that is all i seem to do nowadays.

So let's talk about current affairs. i watched the speech by our garmen leader. I think he's a brilliant man, who woks hard and basically is serving his country. I myself can't imagine being in his shoes for a day, no matter how much he's paid.

Though, i think that there's an issue that needs more thought. The more university places issue. Just because so many parents are complaining that their children can't get into the 3 local unis does not make it the unis fault. No matter how large the population, there has to be a cap at the number of grads out there. As if the thousands of grads who clog up our streets every year is not enough.

"My son got grades of CDE and C6, and he can't get any place."
"My daughter is in poly now, I'm afraid she can't get a place."

Now the above are just examples, but its close enough. I mean, look at me. I'm a lazy piece of shit, but when push comes to shove, I worked hard to get my crummy place in NTU. Siu Sing worked harder than me, for a longer, more sustained period, that's why he's now in the elite engineering science thing.

Now, those other people out there should work hard too, there is no damn point to dilute the scholar grads with more lazy people like me. Or more people who are more lazy than me (if that's possible).

As if all those other private institutions offering business degrees (at half price and half the time) aren't diluting my prospects enough, I now have to deal with a 4th uni?

Cannot tahan la. I already have all the smart Siu Sings and Audreys taking all the high paying jobs, now I have to slit someone's throat to get a factory supervisor job?

Even CD is offering sponsored degree programs at SIM. Die la. Average joe like me, kena diluted to become ordinary-super-average zul.

I'm like so in love with Audi cars right now. Ever since I played Forza Motorsport 1 in 2003, I've been aroused by Audis.

How am I to afford such luxuries with so much competition? Well, I guess that's life. We want to be an education hub, that's why we're upping the no. of grads.

But at who's expense? No point having so many grads, so much so that we become construction workers or maids in richer countries.. But i guess, the garmen will monitor the situation so we don't become a bangladesh, or philipines. That's what they said la.

But I just want to know what will we call the cream of the crop when its been watered down? The low-fat pasteurised goat's milk of the crop?

The Quartermaster's Visit

2007-08-15T09:19:00.000-07:00

Alas, I bringeth news from the front.

I've lost the war. Surrender was inevitable.

The march to the place where I was to surrender was a long, hard one. I handed over my uniform, head bowed down in shame.

Who could have known that such a small thing could have led to my demise?

At last, the hello pandas had their victory.

I traded my No.3 for a 7, and my No.4 for an L.

At this rate, I think I might even be excluded from IPPT. Haha.

The Road Ahead: One pot-hole, and boom!

2007-08-07T07:55:00.000-07:00

I must admit, my cold deameanour lately has got people all wondering who died.

Well, I'm not quiet for no reason. I realised something after reading all the post-College Day entries on people's blogs. Lots of people are utterly moronic and stupid. Some, like my students, really test my patience. But, there are just as many out there who are successful. And all you need to run this world are just a few really smart people. The rest will be working for these people.

Academic results are one thing, but what we do now, what courses we choose, the people we mix with, the stuff we expose ourselves to in the media, all these will shape the person we will be in 10 years.

Whether we'll be the next Stephen Hawking or the Korean scientist who faked his results, or the next bill gates or TT Durai, every single small factor comes into play, whether you'll be successful or a loser.

Intergrity, creativity, personal networks, luck etc.

The life ahead of us will be hard and uncertain. And for the stupid CD Mat like me, what lies ahead?

And people can still wonder why I look like shit nowadays. I'm 19 going onto 20, and I have no life plan. My live-life-in-the-moment doesn't work anymore. I've got to start planning. And guess what? I don't know jackshit.

I can only hope that the many of us destined to work for the great few don't know what to do too. Cos, Highway To Hell is playing right now, and it's just such an apt theme song for the way life is heading right now.

LOL. Wait, this isn't funny.

Out-of -Context

2007-08-04T10:37:00.000-07:00

A simple conversation with one of my students (not their real names):

"So, Emma, you missed me the other day," I said, " Are we going to make it up?"

"Um, you said you weren't going to camp on National Day?" Emma replied.

"Oh, ya, I forgot.. So I do you in the morning?" I asked in turn.

"Uh, ya. 11.30?" she replied sheepishly.

"That's not morning.." I laugh."So how about Melissa?"

"Oh, Melissa and I were discussing. We want to do it together at the same time. While you're with Melissa, I do something else." she suggested.

"But that won't be very good. Can you last 4 hours? I think its best if I do each of you separately."

"Ok. See you thursday then. Good night." she replied and I made my way out of her house.

You know what I've learnt from recently? Anything taken out of context can look really bad. And no, I'm no pervert. I just have to word my sentences properly from now on, lest I continue this till I start real work, I'll have to pay a fortune in sexual harrassment suits. Haha.

Connected@SG

2007-07-31T07:11:00.000-07:00

I bet that all of you are simply dying to know where I've been during my 2 months of absence. Was the voice of truth and justice being snuffed out by some oppressionistic force? To a certain extent, yes, I was facing calamity, but calm down. I've brought uncensored news from the outside world.

The important things that you should know are:

I'm still hot and sexy.
Scientists are still trying to find out how my amazing No.3 uniform does not just tear underneath the stress placed upon it.
I'm still trying to make this website sound funny.
It's not working out very well.

Jokes aside, I was absent for several good reasons. Let's see, in these 2 months, I've experienced:

Meningitis
Established weekly 110km/h motorcycle rides with Isyraf
Got my first tuition paycheck
Conjunctivitis
Blew my first tuition paycheck
Finally got my own internet instead of leeching on my sister
Being hot and sexy, though that's nothing new

Yup. Anywyays, everything above is self explanatory. Though the one thing that I REALLY can't get over is the fact that I'm not getting promoted to LCP tommorow. Because of my 3 weeks MC due to meningitis (which exceeds the alloted quota), I'm being passed over for a promotion. Which is ironic, considering that I'm one of the few who actually does work in that stupid place. Despite numerous appeals from my officer, he only managed to convince the department in charge of promotions not to penalise me again (as they look at the no. of MCs taken in the last 6 month period beforethe promotion) when I'm considered for promotion in November.

Nonsense. But what more can I expect from an institution that recieves only the best pick of ITE and primary-school leavers to form their organisation?

2007-06-01T05:57:00.001-07:00

You know how I always complain about the morons I put up with in CD? I know all of you are tired hearing about it.

But now, I have hard evidence of the stupidity that engulfs me every day.

Introducing Mr X, the personification of a moron, the epitome of a spastic retard, the vanguard of mental disability, the ultimate, perfect BOOB!

He’s from a top 10 JC and his CCA record and external business activities makes what Biz Club did in MJ look like a kindergarten kid’s school project.

From me, at dontbeaboob.com, I proudly proclaim him the first-ever Dontbeaboob’s “But-you-are-a-Boob Award” winner!

*Loud Applause*

It was a sure win because Mr X has a media consultancy business ( fancy name for wedding video / photographer ).

He was tasked with taking a picture of this person in a spa wearing NOTHING BUT a BIKINI:

She's already dressed. :)

But he refused because he didn’t like her attitude.

Would any sane man refuse to shoot this:

Or this:

Let’s congratulate either the most stupid person of the 21st century or the most un-straight man ever born.

Ladies and gentlemen, your But-you-are-a Boob Winner!

Misc Updates

I now have friendster. I realised that forgetting people's names is not very nice anymore so I thought keeping a catalougue would help me remember their names, but I realised that only a quarter of the people I know have profiles. So I guess, I just have to not forget names anymore.

Oh, and of all 3 unis, I accepted NTU Business. Don't give me that expression! NTU Business School is ranked first in Singapore and third in Asia ok?!? Plus, its an accelerated honours program which means I'll get an honours degree in 3 years, not 4.

So even though I will have a degree that another trillion people will have, I will have an extra year to find a job compared to NUS and SMU people.

I hope I don't live to regret this.

Confessions of a Lesser Mind

2007-05-17T06:35:00.000-07:00

So I finally received the reply from SMU yesterday evening. The big ‘Congratulations’ emblazoned on the envelope did give me a glimmer of hope till I read on:

“I am aware that you aspire to do a Law degree program; that you have been interviewed by the school testifies to your potential to be one. (So far so good) Indeed, you have interviewed creditably. (Why, thank you very much) In a field of highly talented candidates, our selection process becomes even more competitive and in this regard, you miss qualifying into the law school. (D’oh!) However, I am delighted to offer you admission into SMU’s Bachelor of Business Management programme at the LKCSB ….. arguably the most popular (You say oversubscribed, I say overrated ) business school. You should be proud of your achievement.” ( Don’t need to patronize me lor.)

It was a long shot anyway. I won’t deny I’m disappointed but it was not much of a surprise, but kudos to the admin office for such a personalized and tact way of rejecting me.

And no, I am not blaming CD for making me stupid and stuff. There was serious competition and I was beaten fairly.

Well, I guess its back to reality. I now have only one option, of which three routes are placed before me.

Business Admin. (It was my sole dream to scrape the A levels and get into this course, at any uni; would have sufficed for me. I guess we were all young and stupid.)

So should I go to SMU ( its 9 times oversubscribed perhaps that many overrated), NUS ( their over-aggressive ads have fooled me into thinking they’re outstanding. Who can go wrong with the tagline ‘That’s the difference between them and N’US.’ ) or the super quiet NTU ( that only finds it sufficient to put up unglamorous ads on buses and bus stops. But perhaps they have the most to offer? )?

I don’t know. Any suggestions?

An Apology to all Pandas out there. I ate your family!

2007-05-10T06:28:00.000-07:00

I just want to apologize to the person who wrote the quote in the previous entry. I was not and am not offended by your writing. It was more of me regretting how my past neglects may have caused one too many obstacles in my pursuit for a better future.

Once again I apologize for any out of context usage of your writings and lack of sensitivity on my part.

Big hug to you!

And no, I've not turned gay.

And yes, I've become really stupid because it took me 10 mins to properly type that out in a readable language.

Is it me? Or is it Ironic in here?

2007-04-29T00:11:00.000-07:00

"As for BizClub? I admit, it form the bulk of the nuisance that I had to deal with in JC life. But I was really glad that I did do those work because they, like a good investment, paid off. I am glad that I did help Zul out when he needed it. If I didn't, I wouldn't smell a scholarship at all."

Life's funny.

I’ve always got what I wanted without having to work too hard, and now, BANG! I get whooped in the ass.

A lot of people getting nice uni applications and here I am, waiting for the offers that scholars decline.

I got accepted for NTU Business last Friday and NUS Business this week.

But the one offer I really am dying to get hasn’t come. I wish they’d just get it over and done with, if they’re not going to give it to me, and just give me the stupid Business acceptance letter.

But of course, if they are still deliberating as to whether they should give me my first choice there, well, take all the time you need, all the way till the end of May.

But it’d be cool if they do give it to me, then I would actually get my first choice for all 3 unis.

Choices

It’s a pivotal point in our lives right now. The courses we have chosen, the things we do now, will affect our professional lives till we die, unless we retake another course after realizing our mistake, though this will cost us a lot.

The irony is, the choice is now not really mine to make, because of my prior bad choices.

Again, I should have taken 4 subs, then I wouldn’t have slacked so much, in such a slack class, till I almost got retained.

Then I would have done better, and in all probability, the quoted quote up there would be mine to make, and the “zul” would have another name on it.

By providence, I got 2 choices put forth to me right now. And I do hope that by another act of God, I will get the one choice that I’ll be able to accept without any further thought.

Heavenly Spies

The wonders of the internet eh? The girl form heaven was found to be mortal, after a quick search on different blogs, friendster and the school yearbook.

But the internet can never beat your own network sources. And from my sources, I have learnt that I have never talked to that ‘heavenly body’ ever.

Another form of proof that my hotness precedes me. =)

But of course, one would not need sources, if one was observant enough to remember what one does in school. My bad. =p

So I didn’t forget the person’s name, its just that I didn’t know the person.

See? I’m not forgetful after all.

But WAIT! At CD HQ, this guy suddenly approached me and said hi. I remembered him as being from Vishnu’s class. But I couldn’t remember his name, so I looked at his nametag, and said hi, Josh!

But after the watching wild hogs yesterday with Vishnu and the rest, ( I didn’t need to do guard duty after all.) I realized that that guy borrowed his nametag from someone because it was his first day!!!

Damn embarrassing. Hoho.

The girl of bus 854; The girl from heaven.

2007-04-24T02:44:00.000-07:00

The Girl of Bus

I was late yesterday morning, so I had to sprint for the No. 2 bus. What I didn’t know was that early-morning sprint would freshen me up for what was to come.

I then transferred to bus 854 to go to HQ, chose a seat and sat down. As the bus was about to move off, a JC girl, (I shan’t name the JC) boarded.

This was the second time I’ve seen this particular girl, but yesterday, she was the personification of the perfect female form. She stood at the front of the bus, looking for a seat on the semi-full bus. She was unsure of whether she should take the vacnt double seats at the front, or a single seat next to an old man, which happened to be the seat directly in front of me.

She bit her lip, a befuddled expression on her face, one that turned her visage from perfectly beautiful to irresistibly adorable.

As if knowing that her lips betrayed her adolescence, she returned her expression to its usual, demure self.

She walked toward me, and sat at the seat in front of me.

My heart leapt into my throat.

“Eh, you dreaming ah?” my Corporal George, was shaking me back to consciousness, “ You ok or not, stoning like that?”, he said loudly.

I didn’t even realize that all this time he was sitting in the seat diagonally in front of me.

The girl, shifted in her seat, turned and smiled at me, albeit in amusement at my reaction.

It’s obvious from the detail I’ve described the 8 seconds that she took to sit down, that I was just blatantly staring at her, and George didn’t help by making it less obvious.

She knew.

The girl of 854 knew, that for 8 seconds, all my attention was forcibly transfixed onto her.

The Girl From Heaven

I took MC today. Went to the Pasir Ris polyclinic, and proceeded to the Marine Parade CC to sign up for a class. Then I ate chicken rice at banquet and then didi some window shopping.

Met Hui Yi on the way. Still as lovely as ever. Met Abraham too. He’s going BMT this Friday. Godspeed to him.

Parkway has changed much since my VS days. To me, a visit to Parkway is never complete without a visit to Ig’s Heaven, a cool gift shop, with lots of quirky stuff.

I went into the shop as usual, eager to see the new cool stuff they may have brought in.

I started to play around with the balance balls thingy, (which I think are SO cool).

“Excuse me, Zul.” The salesgirl muttered politely, and I obliged, thereafter resuming fiddling with balls.

Suddenly, it occurred to me, the salesgirl knew my name. I looked at my chest.

Nope, no stupid CD name tag there. I was in my home clothes. I must be hearing things.

I looked at the salesgirl. Hmm. A hot salesgirl knows my name? Poppycock la. But could she?

I proceeded to the shelf behind her. She was busy trying to get a cool light clock from the top shelf.

Good god, I was staring again.

She came down the footstool, “Hey, zul.”

So she did know my name.

“Remember me? **** from MJ.” She started a conversation. I immediately liked her friendly tone.

“Ah, yes.. ****! From… um.. Ya. ****.” That was all that I could say in return.

She then busied herself with the customer who wanted the clock, and I made an exit, still in shock and in awe, that I forgot such a hot girl’s name.

What do I make of these 2 incidents?

I got to start remembering people's names more.

And I got to stop staring. At least, obviously staring, that is. Hoho.

1 swoosh is better than 3 ______.

2007-04-20T07:03:00.000-07:00

I think BRT had done quite a good deal for me. I shed quite a bit of weight, cut down my 2.4 timing by 5 minutes plus, finally beating my brother-in-law who proclaimed that he was unbeatable. Well, Tubby beat you.

BUT now, in my little cubicle, I sense myself being more “value-added”, the value being in kg.

With every packet of Hello Panda! I eat, I feel 10 seconds added back to my timing. Not to mention my toight No.3 uniform is now just plain tight.

And it may not be only me, but the Hello Pandas in the cafeteria are getting nicer and nicer, because it keeps getting sold out.

Well, you can’t say that CD doesn’t add value, can you?

Oh, and my pay is getting more and more miserable. Yes, I get the same pay as Vishnu and Siu Sing, but Vishnu has food, lodging and transport provided 5 days a week, Siu Sing has food provided, while I have to pay for my daily food, transport and Hello Pandas. That leaves me with little to enjoy on weekends. Bummer.

Anyways, Siu Sing and I met up yesterday to collect some Biz Club t-shirts, which are overpriced, by the way.

I must say, Sing does look dashing in his No. 3. Tight ass. Hoho.

But not as tight as mine.

And I must say, my circle of friends are rather successful high-flyers aren’t we? When collecting the t-shirts, Wei Qiang, current bossman, believed us when Sing told Wei Qiang he was a pilot and I told him I was a Lieutenant-Colonel.

Then I think Vishnu was promoted to Brigadier-General last week I think.

Oh, and here’s a fast fact, if you ride a bicycle out of the bicycle path anywhere in Singapore, you can get hit by a bus, truck, car, aircraft carrier or all four simultaneously!

It’s not true you say? According to my dearest mama, it IS true. I’ll die a horrible death if I get a bicycle. The moment my 2 wheels touch the road, drivers will immediately veer off course to ram me to death. Yes, even the Brigadier-General on his aircraft carrier will hit me.

At least that was the reason she used not to allow me to get my mountain-bike.

Little does she know about the cheapskate china-made bike I have parked in the car-park Need to repair the rims though. I guess I’m just a tad too heavy for those cheap ass tires. Lol.

And yes, I’m very bored in the office right now. But wait, its lunchtime! And I hear pandas calling.

PS: This entry was written on Tuesday, but because CD still relies on the floppy disk, and my sister's com hs no floppy drive, I had to transfer it to my thumb first............... I hate computers. And I just logged onto MSN after a year of inactivity.

The Wrong Room

2007-04-07T04:36:00.000-07:00

Eh. I think I’ve lost my funny. I’ve become more of a bastard-ish kind of funny, something like Egoman’s kind of funny, but something totally different too.

Bah. No matter.

This week was an eventful week. I had the law interview and my Passing Out Parade (POP)..

Firstly, let me cover the interview. I tell you, I have not been in the ‘thinking’ frame of mind ever since I’ve left Biz Club. I’ve neither watched what I’ve said, nor done any serious bullshiting since then.

CD hasn’t helped to sharpen any of my skills either.

Lo and behold, when I arrived at the seminar room, I was greeted to a room full of guy nerds. And 2 pretty, manicured VJ girls, who in my opinion looked like they would be my future bosses one day.

We were then asked to proceed into the adjacent room and were tasked to write an essay on one of five topics given to us within 15 minutes.

4 out of 5 were Lit-based questions. They took excerpts from Shakespeare and asked us to relate it to the confines of the local legal system.

I had no choice but to do the last general question on “The greatest human virtue is ….”

I put ‘hope’.

When the time was over, I must say, I was satisfied with the essay I had written and was confident that the next part of the interview process would go fairly well.

We were then asked to proceed to 2 waiting areas, each leading to an interview room. It was free seating, and fate had seated me in a particular area.

We waited for our turn to go in, and 3 by 3 we went in for our group interviews. I must say, wrong company to hang out with. In with me was one VJ and one AC guy.

The VJ guy, I will never forget. No, I’m not smitten, I’m just shell shocked. He spoke with such eloquence, with such proficiency, confidence, grace, finesse, he left me looking like an uncouth barbarian. Thank god, the AC guy was a poor speaker.

I can’t begin to describe how it felt to be outspoken, and beaten, yet I felt that he deserved his win. Thank god it was just a Q and A style of interview, for if I had debated that guy, I would have left the room, curled up into a ball, sucking my thumb.

Kudos to that guy.

All in all, I felt that I did my best, but I was awoken to the true realities of life. Your best may not be enough. All it needs are a few good men, like that VJ guy to beat the rest of us. I will never forget his name, for he may one day be an MP or something. Post-interview, I did some digging up and discovered that he was a very prominent figure in RI and VJ.

Totally the wrong room to be in.

Ah, I’m lazy to write any further, so I’ll keep it short.

I’m now a Private in CD. POP went well ( how could it not? I was in charge of all proceedings. =p )

And now, I’m posted to the SCDF HQ in Ubi into the Finance Department.

Its an 8 to 5 job.

So anyone knows anybody who can get me tuition clients?
Call me if you know of anyone.

Till next time.

POPOPOPO! POP!

2007-03-30T23:16:00.000-07:00

I haven’t updated in ages primarily because I’ve been sick of my CD life and I just want to enjoy the brief reprieve that they afford us every weekend. I have the same complaint, that is the people there REALLY are horrible. I know I complain every week, but I just have to vent ONE last time before I have my Passing Out Parade. The people there in my opinion, form the lowest societal class in Singapore. Rowdy hooligans. I know I sound super high and mighty, but seriously you have to be there to understand it. Best of luck to Muhammad and Hafiz who are going in, in 2 weeks time. More luck to Muhd though. Heh.

Enough emo complaining stuff. I’ve done quite a lot these past few weeks. Notably, I went out with the old class last week. My, my, absence does make people look hotter. Heh.

I went out with Hafiz, for the first time, ever. We went to Changi to eat Flattened Chicken Rice. We took his friends car, and he sped like some dog. Woohoo. His friends seem rather mat, they smoke and go clubbing, though I don’t mind them, for a simple reason, they have a brain.

But all these things seem trivial now. I was eating BK with my platoonmate (English speaking Australian-Arab guy) yesterday. Then I got a phone call from a strange number. A very throaty, yet soothing male voice introduced himself as someone, and I shall not mention his name. He said he was form SMU admissions. My mind went racing, (something that hasn’t happened since I donned the Civil Defence uniform). I was like “shit shit. I’m rejected so fast?”

He finally went on to say that I’ve been short listed for the law interview, and that its this coming week, that a on-the-spot essay will be required… blah. Blah. Blah.

My mind went racing again. ‘ my results weren’t that bad I suppose.’

I took a bite out of my Mushroom Swiss.

My mind stopped racing. Then my ‘area of paranoia’, the part of my brain that brews up all the negative things that can happen (which in my opinion was the sole reason I did anything in school or Biz Club) came alive once more (in CD I don’t need to think).

It reminded me that the last time I spoke proper English was 3 months ago, the last time I read any proper current affairs stuff was 3 months ago, and the last time my brain was stimulated was after the last A level paper, 5 months ago.

All this really means I truly am prepared for my interview. Woohoo.

Hopefully, if / when I screw up the interview this week, they’ll still consider me for my second choice. And god willing NUS will accept me, without any interviews, just in case SMU deems me unworthy.

Anyway, I called Azlyn to ask how her SMU interview went. Nice to hear a friendly female voice in a long time. It was ok, then she also said her friend from VJ went for the law one. Dang. Competition. From smart people. (Repeat previous paragraph).

Anyways, I got to go now. Got to go eat lunch. I swear, the calories I burn over the course of the week are just paid back over the weekend. But like the badge on my field pack, “ Eat well, Stay fit, Die Anyway.”

I got a lot of flak for that badge. Heh. So much so they shaved off 2 mins off my runnig timing within a week. LOL.

After rereading this entry, I think I’m happier now that I’m leaving those CD people behind. I just hope that when I’m posted out, I don’t meet a whole new slew of them.

2007 resolution: Next entry onwards, I’ll cut the complaints and bring more of the funny that made dontbeaboob have 2-digit hits. Cos now the stagnating single and barely 2 digit hits are not good.

Heh. POP next thursday. Woot!

A New Dawn, A New Day

2007-03-10T21:44:00.000-08:00

You know what? I've never felt the way I've felt on results day. The feeling of relief, that I didn't flop like a loser, mixed with the feeling of regret that I didn't achieve my true potential like many of peers had.

So I guess from my morose mood, I didn't do very well did I?

Like a lost sheep, I followed Siu Sing round the NUS open house yesterday. Really really don't know what I want to do. Earlier on, I wanted to do business, but alas, a business degree now is worth as much as the paper its printed on. Though I still don't know what I want to do, after the whole thing was done, I managed to scratch a rough idea from my Civil Defence-induced coma of a brain of what I wanted to do.

We proceeded on with a journey to SMU. Four words could sum up the experience there. "All presentation, no content." The only reason I dragged Siu Sing and Muhd there was probably to check out their new law school. It wasn't of a comfort that my grades were the bare minimum requirements, with the exception of GP, which amusingly, the arts students in MJ did atrociously for ( For which I'm sure is retribution for looking down on science students' lack of imagination and creativity). But I'm sure even IF I managed to score an interview, I'll probably fail it, seeing as how it takes me ages to construct sound English sentences, be it in written form or oral.

Though with all the regret I have for not putting in my utmost, for what had been the most important exam in my life ever, there is a little reprieve that my results are better than some, if not few people.

4 more weeks till I get out of recruit life, 4 more weeks to end the torment, the personal mental toll on my intelligence.

2 more weeks for me to decide which course I should take. Damn. No one told me that life just throws everything it has at you, the moment you receive your result slip. All decision making is on our own now. We have to manage or money, time and future now.

I guess I shouldn't have bought the XBox wheel should I? Its one hell of a distraction.

The Real World

2007-02-10T21:49:00.000-08:00

I swear, NS makes you ignorant. Shielded from all news from the outside world for 5 days a week, I come back feeling like a hilly-billy. New gadgets, new news, more people dying, new tv shows, I come home feeling so... inadequate. But that's NS life I guess. your mind switches off for a few months.

Anyway, the title of the post below was so apt. Little did I know that one of my platoonmates was actually the Crew Leader at Pasir Ris MacDonald's. The night that Siu Sing and Isyraf came over for the 12 hour gamefest at my place was the night when the freak heavy rains took place. But being hungry gamers, we ordered Macs, that took 3 hours to come. The only reason that they sent a dispatch in the heavy rains was because we kept calling for our food. And he was the one who had to pack it. LOL. He looked at my IC and asked me whether I was the persistent bastard who kept calling for my Macs during that night. The manager was then forced to send a rider. LOL. It wasn't our fault. We were hungry.

Anyways, I went out with my platoonmates yesterday, shortly after Vishnu, Siu Sing and Isyraf came over to my place to game and pig out on pizza. Wah. Big mistake. Those pieces of shit (my platoonmates) told me to meet them at 7 sharp at bugis, so i rushed there in a cab, that eventually cost me 15 bucks and they had the cheek to arrive at 7.45 to 8.15. They then smoked like 2 packs of cigarrettes each and we played pool. For people who play pool regularly, they suck. I've played pool like 6 times, and I managed to win 2 of 4 games. To think that till today, i don't know how to hold the pool stick. I was still miffed about wasting so much moolah on my cab fare and left early, after paying for more than my share at the pool place. I would rather have had Siu Sing and the rest stay over at my house longer so we could catch up. Well, that's the first and last time i go out my platoonmates.

You know how adults keep bitching about how tough working life is, and how precious weekends are? I think they're on to something. I just feel like catching up with friends, gaming and watching tv. If possivle, i want everything to happen without me leaving my house. Ah well, the real world sucks.

Oh, and my pay finally came in. It feels good to spend money that didn't come from your parents' wallet (except when you spend that money on a stupid cab ride). Though it really showed me the importance and good feeling of having cash flowing into your bank account. I can't wait to get a job. I guess I really am a spoilt child, never having worked in my entire life. Ah wells, I'm going to save up for my driving lessons and that wireless XBox 360 wheel, the wet dream of any 360 owner.

Call 6777-3777 If you want to meet my platoonmates

2007-01-19T23:34:00.000-08:00

I seem to complain a lot on my blog huh. Viewership has been down as more of my fanbase has been caught up in their work or are serving in the Serve And F***off.

So I shall be thankful today of all the glorius things that have been happening of late.

I thank my :

Paranoia -- For without it, I wouldn't have brought half my medicine cabinet and i would have been sick for the whole week in camp.

Rain -- What's the big deal with that guy anyway? I thank the real rain. And God of course, for bringing it. For without it, morning and afternoon PT would have been long enough to kill.

Aww, I can't stand this goody-two-shoes crap. I want to rant again.

I hate Mats. 10 days with them, and I'm speaking in Mat language half the time. My English is deplorable, and worse, I'm thinking in Mat!

They're nice people la. BUT they're damn lazy. To study I mean. They're actually quite sharp. And they say I have no life. Spent my whole life studying. Yeah. I agree, I didn't have a childhood, I didn't have much of a fun teenage life, but guess what boys? Half the damn country is trying to improve themselves everyday so that they can be commercially viable when they enter the workforce and not be the delveryboy who delivers ME my Macdonalds at 3am in the morning, dipshit.

I'm tired.

Camp life is the same everyday la. Wake up, make your bed, run, eat, run, march, swim, eat, run, attend some stupid lesson, run, eat, talk cock, polish shit shoes, sleep and REPEAT. Boring.

And I better log off now before I get too incoherent SIA.

--- I suddenly want to upgrade my bicycle to a motorcycle. Mwahahaha. I'm going to be a changed person 3 months from now.

Back From THAT Place

2007-01-12T22:38:00.000-08:00

I'm back. Came back yesterday, had dinner and slept like a log for 12 hours. The 4 hour sleep nights I've been having of late have taken a brutal toll on my unconditioned XBox 360 playing body.

Oh my god, I expected CD to be tough, since my much fitter sources said so. But I wasn't prepared for such a brutal onslaught of EVIL.

The physical part, I can handle.
The screaming, I can handle.
The higher expectations for A level students, I can handle.

The people, I cannot handle.

I have 37 people in my platoon, including me. Out of that, 30 people are from ITE or below. By below, I mean ITE, 1 O level pass, (namely their MT) or 1 N level pass, or even primary 6 education. And no, its not their education status that scares me, its their attitudes. Mats, Bengs, and the like, they are everywhere SURROUNDING me. And it doesn't help, that when either me or the other JC guy (from YJC) makes a mistake, the Platoon Sergeant screams at us "A-level students!?! You thinks you smart? Then why you making mistake? "(sic). Ah yes, I'm sure they teach you how to pull your bedsheet super tight, till a coin can bounce of it, in JC. The wonders of our education system.

I knew that it would be prudent not to seperate myself from the rest by even giving a hint of my education status, but that Sergeant was a bastard. And I learnt yesterday, from another JC guy in another platoon that the reason why he hates JC ppl was because even though he was best cadet, he couldn't get into the elite ERS course because he didn't have the proper education status. Boo hoo for him, but you don't need to take it out on me. Now the more evil platoonmates are looking at me and the other guy in a funny way, but hey, I don't give a shit.

Not a good start eh?

But its not all bad. Some of the others are ok. Though I have to communicate either with broken english or malay to them, which will undoubtedly cause my own language skills to deteriorate, they're good people, caught in circumstances that weren't as conducive as ours so they weren't able to achieve their fullest potential. But I do have to watch my mouth though. I remarked once that the uniform looks like a glorified security guards' uniform, and a few of them, being former security guards took offense.

But I guess NS is shitty everywhere for the first initial weeks, so I need to get used to the language and the more abrasive cultures and colourful characters around me.

Well, wish me luck. I'm going back tommorow night, and I need to survive another 5 days, that is IF I don't get stuck with Guard Duty if I cock up, for which I've already been threatened with, along with many others.

Woohoo and whopeedoo, I'm getting $350 for this shit.

The Big Z

2007-01-08T01:16:00.000-08:00

I told you all I was hot. You see, even some random unreliable girly gay blogger quiz thingy agrees with me.

They got hot, smart, genius, magician and cupid down right, buit being unreliable, gay and girly, they got certain parts wrong, namely dirty, liar, mad and deviant. I'm a saint ok?

So anyways, goodbye everyone, for my hotness fades again. I'm going to my new home at Jalan Bahar tommorow. I'll be learning how to put out garbage chute fires so i can keep your HDB flats safe. you're welcome. Don't miss me ok?

Yes, you. Don't miss me. Yes, I'm talking to you, the reader. What's that? I can't hear you. You don't give a shit? Ah, yes, always the joking crowd. I'll miss you too. Yes, point the middle finger, I'll miss you that much too.

Thank god I don't have a confinement period like the army. But the army ain't that bad too you know? Vishnu got into the Pes BP Welfare platoon and 1 month into his BMT and they're only doing 10 for their 5 BX. Basically, 10 push ups, sit ups, jumping jacks, burpeeeeees (how the heck do you spell that crappy exercise) and flutterkicks or another exercise. That's like the first day of NCC training in VS if you're sick. But hey, he's got 5 months more. So i guess by the end, 5 BX will be up to like a gazillion reps, so godspeed Vishnu. Godspeed.

As for me, according to my SCDF source, the training isn't so gradual. Well, whoopeedoo for me then. Ain't that a pickle. I'm sure my untrained muscles are dying for a less than gradual transition from all-nighters fighting zombies on my couch, to PT at 6 am in the morning. Whooopee.

But hey, I go in tmw, I just need to survive for 4 days, 3 nights till i book out. Then rest for 1 and a half days and go back in then survive 5 days, rest and repeat for 2 years. Wow. FUN.

Well whoopeedoo.

Emo Shit

2007-01-04T00:18:00.000-08:00

I woke up today with a feeling of total dread. For I know that in 4 days, I’ll be gone. My rite of passage as a man will be a long hard 2 years. After that, I’ll be a man.

A man. Wow.

So I logged onto the net at my sister’s place, as I always do when I either get emo or bored. And I blog hopped around. It seems everyone is doing their yearly resolutions and whatever other nonsense. I guess it doesn’t hurt for me to jump onto the bandwagon.

My resolution is simple.

Its to have no fear, and to go all the way, even against all odds, in everything I do.

NS is going to be a trying time for many, especially for me. I guess that I’ve learnt a few things in life.

One, is that fear is bad. VS has taught me that, and I never fully appreciated what VS had taught me till I stepped into JC. Being posted into NCC Land against my will was a scary twisted start to my VS life. I was a wussy sissy piece of shit back then, afraid of my own shadow. Let’s just say that fear is highly visible and it attracts aggression. I mean, if you see a scared cat, the evil side of you would ask you to kick it won’t it? But not everyone in Land was evil, and eventually I found a nice comfortable home tormenting others. Heh.

Fear puts you at the bottom of any food chain, and I cannot have fear cos I cannot be at the bottom anymore.

Another thing I learnt from all this is that, well, if you’re at the bottom, shit rolls down hill. I thank god that when shit rolled to me, it had some more road to roll downhill. I thank the brave soul who made my initial Land days easier, and the subsequent days fun. A salute to Mr ****** *** ***.

MJ has taught me some interesting and valuable lessons too. It taught me to go all the way, so that you don’t regret later on. I regret taking 3 subjects instead of 4, cos I was too lazy to take 4. I regret other things, things that would not have happened if I had pushed harder a little more. It also taught me that even if all the odds are against you, tenacity and wit will get you through many things. It also taught me that not all things in life a rosy and good. A little pre-emptive dirty play could prevent other dirty players form succeeding.

I really hope for the best in the upcoming 2 years of my life, for I hope that it’ll be a great learning experience for me.

Oh my god, I’m kinda emo today aren’t I? must be the rain.

On a side note, I feel that people who get panic attacks are total wussy, sissy faggots. I mean, its ok to be anxious about something like how I woke up today, but to be not able to breathe and to get a panic attack means your life is totally out of your control. Wussy.

Oh, and pardon the grammatical errors, and all the other poor English stuff. My brain has been switched off ever since the end of the A’s. and I’m going to the Civil Defence. Who needs a brain?

Promises. Bah.

2006-12-29T10:50:00.000-08:00

I promised that i would update today and I have.

Let's see. What did I do today?

Oh, I went out with Siu Sing for lunch and some other stuff. Lots of sales. Like EVERYWHERE. But money was NOWHERE. Bah. I need fulus.

Want to buy a new X Box game.

Ghost Recon Advanced Warfighter?
Rainbow Six Las Vegas?
Splinter Cell Double Agent?

Hoho. Cashless = gameless

gameless = rambling early in the morning

Bye!

Too Hot To Update

2006-12-28T02:45:00.000-08:00

I haven’t updated in a gazillion years. As some of you may think otherwise, I must come out in the open. I have a life.

Ya anyway, I’m kinda lazy now plus I only have like 12 days of freedom from NS so I’m going to be brief. I segmented my holiday exploits into different sections which I am sure all of you are dying to read about.

Villa Hotness
My new house rocks la. Imagine me swimming, toned body and all. A sight to behold. Or just chilling in the steam room with a room full of shriveled almost naked guys. Yes I know. You’re jealous of the things I get to see.

Fast Like Flash
Moi bought a bicycle. My mother doesn’t allow it, but she doesn’t know about it either. Haha. But when you’re living in a place in the middle of nowhere, you need a form of transport you know. Plus, its good exercise.

So one day I went cycling… for fun. Yep you heard it. I was SO bored I went cycling for FUN. I went with Muhd. So we went from my place to Changi Village, then to the other end of Changi Beach, then to Changi Airport, got lost, and later ended up at East Coast Park and back to my Changi Villa Hotness. We cycled for 6 hours in the rain. I felt so rugged. And get this, I beat muhd cycling, uphill! Heh. You gotta to adopt the ‘too tuff to puff’ mantra. Cos when a fit boy like me beats you at cycling, you gotta to tuff-en up.

Did I Just See The Hotness at Orchard? Or was that Brad Pitt?

I tell you. Holidays suck. You go out. You have fun. And you become poor.

But I did get to meet up with my old sec 2 VS classmates. One of them is a Sergeant in the SCDF. He gave me a whole walkthrough of what to expect. I want to grow up to be just like him. Earning $1000+ and working for 12 hours a day, then having 2 days of leave. Now that’s life. But I have to be as fit as him though. Damn. That’ll mean I need 2 miracles.

SHIT, WTF Happened to my holidays?

There were times I was so bored I actually went to the gym downstairs to pass time. But no more. My mum took solace in my misery and bought me an X box 360! Woot. I finished The Godfather and Gears of War. But POOF! The holidays are suddenly coming to an end. Damn machine. It sucked all my time away.

Buyer beware: X Box 360 eats up your time without you knowing. Isyraf and Siu Sing came to my place to swim at 4 pm last Tuesday and they went home at 5 am on Wednesday. They had no chance.

A lot of things are swirling in my magnificent head of mine, but I got to kill my brother in law in Dead or Alive 4 now. I’m a hot long-legged top-heavy girl whopping his ass. So I’ll update more hopefully tmw or Saturday

Let’s hope I keep my update promise this time.